~Still waiting to see if I get a referral to fix my issues, lame.

~Almost found a new job, but it was just an independent contractor commission only insurance sales position in the end, lame. So still trying to find a new job and cleaning my room and keeping M sane.

~Sadly my car needs work on it again, after the radiator burst and caused overheating and making the head have issues so it'd continue to overheat, now it's the catalytic converter and the pre-catalytic. We fixed the catalytic, temporarily, but now it's the pre-catalytic that isn't flowing right. It won't accelerate properly, takes forever on flat ground and on an incline it struggles to maintain a decent speed. And by decent speed I mean if I don't have insane momentum then on bad inclines I'm lucky if I can keep 20mph. So that means visiting M requires city streets only, freeways on the way to him go up and down too much. Joy. Now we save and save because car comes before finishing my almost finished computer.

~Because of helping his friend D, M has most of the parts for my new computer build and it's exciting. Too bad it won't be done soon, oh well. I have a shiny LAN box and a motherboard and processor, going to borrow one of M's video cards for now so just need RAM and a hard drive. If the one in my mac mini isn't dying, I'll just use it, but I have to test. It's been shutting itself down, hopefully it's just a heating issue.

~I have New Balance Minimus trail shoes and I love them so much. Been going on walks around the neighborhood with them and my new yoga pants and ahh, I love being outside. Going to use the Couch To 5K plan to get better at taking walks, woo.

So first off, not gastroenterologist unless it gets worse/bleeds more/I hate going to the doctor.

I've barely been home recently, there goes thinking my little schedule plan will work, haha.

Also, I use MacJournal to post to here except now it freaks out dealing with sharing, can't share, can't edit share settings, it just freezes up. I could upgrade finally but I have exercise things to buy that come first so, maybe not.

LAYER ONE: THE OUTSIDE<br>
- Name: Meagan / Aiden<br>
- Eye Color: Green/yellow/light brown (hazel, call it hazel, a very green hazel)<br>
- Hair Style/Color: Medium brown, shoulder length for now (growing to butt) usually in a ponytail<br>
- Height: 5'3"<br>
- Clothing style: Comfy whatever<br>
- Best physical feature: Hands<br>
<br>
LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE<br>
- Your fears: Spiders, heights, very small spaces, going blind <br>
- Your guilty pleasure: I'm don't feel guilt over any of it! (overly dramatic tv shows and smut fanfiction)<br>
- Ambitions for the future: Stability<br>
<br>
LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS<br>
- Your first thoughts waking up: It can't be morning, just a few more hours.<br>
- What you think about most: Michael and how I can't wait to get a place with him for more cuddle times<br>
- What you think about before bed: Too many things, it's why I take a pill to help me fall asleep<br>
- You think your best quality is: Being nice<br>
<br>
LAYER FOUR: WHAT’S BETTER?<br>
- Single or group dates: Single<br>
- To be loved or respected: I don't really get this one, you can't really love without respect so...<br>
- Beauty or brains: Brains<br>
- Dogs or cats: Cats, though I have a soft spot for my parent's mini and toy poodles
<br>
LAYER FIVE: DO YOU?<br>
- Lie: Yeah, and sadly I can be good at it<br>
- Believe in yourself: More now because of anti-depressants<br>
- Want someone: Yes, in that I have someone but not physically with me as often as I'd like<br>
<br>
LAYER SIX: EVER?<br>
- Been on stage: Yes<br>
- Done drugs: Yup<br>
- Changed who you were to fit in: More like I tried to be good at social t...

So, last June I had an abscess that had to be surgically removed. I was out of work for two weeks, bedridden and in pain. That was awful.



Well, for a moment back in January I thought it came back, which it can, but no, just a hemorrhoid. It started out awful but then got better so eh, I’ll just hope it heals itself. Well, it started to get a bit worse again and I was waiting to see if I needed to call my doctor when it got better. Only, the reason why it got better? Draining. From a hole that should not exist. That I got from surgery back in June. So my doctor is referring me to a gastroenterologist. So we’ll see how this goes. Crossing fingers. Though if the way I’m feeling worse and worse is anything to go by, I may have an infection I need antibiotics for after all.



I’ll make a separate post about last February, I’m all over it finally, realized that while blocking it away I just let it go. I just want to put it all together so it makes sense.



So I get to see Catch Me If You Can  at the Pantages Theatre tomorrow, yay. Really enjoy that movie and it’s free, because M’s grandma and grandpa got tickets before making plans to be out of town. So yay, plans. Maybe we can make it into a date with some food. To be honest, we’ve only really had “dates” on Valentine’s Day. Otherwise even if we do a lot together in one day, it’s just a normal day, it’s not really a date and our time. Well, also our anniversary, that’s six flags day.



I don’t know how long ago my friend C got me a stepper but I finally started using it yesterday. Ah, my knees, but they are okay today and I’ll use it again tomorrow. Sadly putting a box on my desk to make it a standing desk doesn’t make my laptop high enough to use with stepper, must fix this.



I’ll try to keep this updated regularly, sadly it’ll be easy for medical reasons, rawr.

I hate the heat. It's March, not June, this is not right LA.

Set up a daily schedule of sorts, so I don't get too overwhelmed by all that I need to do.
Daily schedule
Sun: study
Mon: tumblr/Pinterest
Tues: photos/music
Wed: study
Thurs: tumblr/Pinterest
Fri: penzu/LJ
Sat: photos/music
So hopefully I'll have more to say Friday.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

Ugh I lost a friend, sadface. I have anti-depressant times but motivation still not optimal. Some health stuff had me bed ridden for weeks that meant nothing done. I won't promise to be back regularly but I do have things to say, things I've finally gotten over that will explain last year. So don't think I'm gone, I just need to sort out all the pile up from last year.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPad.

I still need to get used to this damn app though. Dealing with tags but then couldn't figure out how to get back to writing the post! Oh well. I have my iPad (named Amelia) and her keyboard (still to be named, damn it) and hopefully this means more writing in the future, not just in here. It's hard to just set up my laptop and typing on my lap isn't always easy, depending on where I am. This way I can just pull out two little things and start at it. Yay! A million other things I need to do but oh well, such is life. Do I do anything I mean to do in the day? ...

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPad.

It's holiday card time!  I can't buy anyone a gift but cards are cheap enough.  If you want me to send you a card, just comment with your address, don't worry it's screened.  Even if I've sent you a card before, I like making sure the address I have is still correct, just in case.  I hate getting cards returned to sender, it's sad.  I'll probably send them out the beginning of December and don't worry, I have more than enough to go around.  (Thank you Wal-Mart for 32 cards for $7, double the reserve I had from last year.)

Your result for The Sorting Hat: A Comprehensive Harry Potter Personality Assessment [Test/Quiz]...

Ravenclaw55% Ravenclaw, 48% Hufflepuff, 55% Slytherin and 41% Gryffindor!












Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,


if you've a ready mind,


Where those of wit and learning,


Will always find their kind;





























         The cardinal traits of Ravenclaw are intellect, wit and openness to experience. They are the most introverted house of the four. Ravenclaws are more likely to prefer small gatherings of like-minded individuals and require recooperation after stressful social interaction. These individuals are intuitive creatures, the quintessential researchers. They lack the stubborn, strict, and rule-abiding qualities that would inhibit intellectual growth—one can't be too set in their ways if they are to be open to exploring new ideas and paths of thought.In contrast to Slytherin and Gryffindor, Ravenclaws in general are much more emotionally stable. Their reactions seem dampened compared to the sometimes dramatic responses of the other houses—they're much less likely to get offended, they're more open to criticism, not particularly argumentative and interested in hearing different points of view. They can at times seem to be less interested in people and more interested in their own inner world, and appear to be disconnec...

What is your LEAST favorite movie of all time, and why?

First question listed was submitted by roguetheelf. (Follow-up questions, if any, may have been added by LiveJournal.)

View 1154 Answers


I'm torn between Napoleon Dynamite and Skyline.  On the one hand, I just want those hours back from watching Napoleon Dynamite, I found it too dumb.  I know it's a love-or-hate movie and well, I hated it.  On the other hand, Skyline didn't make me want my money back, I was just too sensitive at the moment so kept having near panic attacks.  Also, horrible ending and by that I don't mean the plot ending, I mean where they cut it off.  Also also, it works for the title of this writer's block, it could not be unseen and that made for not happy times after.

Not sure when I’ll get to those entries I spoke of before, because I have too much to do (as always) and I’ll want to do them right. Also, I shouldn’t even be on my computer today because it’s National Day of Unplugging but things prompted me to change up my twitter/facebook privacy and such and respond to something before it sat for too long in my mind. But I shall clean a great deal today and then when I’m with Michael we plan to stay unplugged and really spend Us time together, instead of TV time together.

Why do I have so much crap? Also, I need candy so I can partake in moderation instead of going OMG NEED SUGAR.

To the cleaning!

Time is relative. Also, life is relative, shades of grey. It is because we are not all the same, even when we have a lot in common. You can find someone, hypothetically, with the exact same list of interests as me but that person still would not be me. Hypothetic-clone-me will not have the same reasons for liking what I like, will not have the same perspective on things we agree on. So when I say we are all unique special snowflakes, I mean in very specific terms, no one else is me. I do not mean special as in deserving special treatment or any other self-empowerment kind of way. We are all the same only in that we are all different. Thusly, life is relative, though luckily not to the point that no one can agree on anything. Now, I am not about to say anything revolutionary, as far as I know, but I will be thinking aloud. There are things that I find myself at odds with when it comes to the general “society” view and some just interest me, some bother me, but they are all worthy of discussion. Am I crazy? That is another thing entirely. Why am I doing this? Because when there is too much on your mind, you get it out. My way is writing, so you will be subjected to my ramblings. At a later date.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

(how is it already Christmas? I don’t approve. I turn 25 in three days omg)

 It's that time again.  I haven't shopped for cards yet but very soon.  I'll probably mail them out right after Thanksgiving.  I already have a bunch of addresses but I like to make sure things haven't changed without my knowing.  Comments are screened but you can also email me if you want.  My address hasn't changed from last year but if you're sending cards and want to double check, just let me know.

I'm already listening to Christmas music.  I love this time of year.

I’m being productive again. I finally geotagged all my photos, now I need to sort them then rename them. Oh, then put them back into iPhoto and tag them. Joy /sarcasm I’m also doing my medical billing and coding program again. I’m on medical terminology. Shoot me now. I’m using flash cards, seriously, shoot me. I also made it to level 80 in WoW, finally. (shut up!) It’s nice, getting things done.
I got 24 hours last week but only 14 this week, 18 next week. If it wasn’t for Michael, I’d be screwed. Okay, time to add “find a new job” to my productivity list and by that I mean actually do something about it. At least it gives me plenty of time to study?
That seems about it for now, need to finish this chapter before I go to Michael. He’s finally practicing driving! His permit expires beginning of December so he needs to get his license before then. He also has a car (used, ’89 Sentra) that he’s going to buy, so that will be nice. And it’s manual so I’ll get to learn.

I’m trying out using MacJournal instead of iJournal because this way I can keep both my LJ backed up (in a way) together with my personal private ramblings. Not sure how it’s going to work out so fingers crossed.
Work is work. Work was light this week and by light I mean 11.5 scheduled hours. Joy. No, not of my doing though I did take advantage of my five days off (wtf) and went home to visit family. It was a nice trip, made dinner for my family both nights. Well, Michael and I made my favorite casserole the first night and then the second night he made his chicken and broccoli fettuccini (homemade sauce yum). Tasty food was tasty. Tried to stay positive about work. New idea? First find a temp part time job around here but once Michael has a car (and his license, obviously) we’re thinking of moving up to my hometown. I should never say never, shouldn’t I? Well, hopefully third time living there will be the charm, haha. Plus, if it means living with Michael finally, I won’t complain.
We’re still okay. We got our moments and by our moments I mean I go crazy and we both get a little hurt but then we work it out (I stop being crazy) and life isn’t so bad. We’ve had more nights of practically not seeing each other but making it work for an hour or two. Tonight will be another short night, picking him up from work and after just a half an hour (to maybe an hour) dropping him off at home so he can work on cleaning his room. (Yes, one hour with me and then being taken home still gives him more time to clean because it can take him two hours to walk home from work.) This is life and I know it could be way worse. If only that logic worked when my mind goes negative (really negative).
I need to be more productive. I need more positive days, I’m tired of these negative days keeping me from doing anything, even fun things. Yes, organizing photos (geotagging, sorting, renaming) is considered fun by me, I’m weird. Come on, brain, stop being silly....

It's been forever, hasn't it? Well, I got a shiny new laptop and I take her to my boyfriends all the time so I shall not let this haitus continue! (I'm at home now, it's a rare day indeed that I don't get him for the afternoon)
Now, what did you hear last? Let us start with work.

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a. Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search.
b. Using only the first page, pick an image.
c. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into fd’s mosaic maker. Choose 3 columns with 4 rows.

The Questions:
1. What is your first name?
2. What is your favorite food?
3. What high school did you go to?
4. What is your favorite color?
5. Who is your celebrity crush?
6. Favorite drink?
7. Dream vacation?
8. Favorite dessert?
9. What you want to be when you grow up?
10. What do you love most in life?
11. One Word to describe you.
12. Your online moniker.

No, I’m not dead. I know, I’ve kind of disappeared. Life kind of got away from me. There have been some great things, some okay things, and some stressful things. There are things I need to tell you, things I won’t tell you publicly, and things I really shouldn’t say at all. I always have too much on plate but I’m going to try to do better on here. My focus may not be back greatly but I’m resolved. Things will be different. They already are and I’m working on making the good changes stick and dealing with the not so pleasant ones. I’m an adult and the road has been bumpy but I don’t give up. Okay, I have in the past and I’m actually really good at it. But some things I can’t just turn my back on because either they are a life-requirement (money is necessary) or I need to change a pattern emerging. Oh hell, maybe I’ll even tell you that which I shouldn’t because that’s what protected entries are for. I would really get into things now but I’m tired and trying not to totally blow my sleep schedule yet, that’s what Saturday night after D&D is for. And yes, I keep ending with prepositions because I don’t care. The English language is silly. So yeah, be prepared for a lot tomorrow. Writing an entry is on my to do list and I’m good at finishing those.

Manga for sale, prefer $5 a volume but if you want a series or quite a few I could be talked down to $3 a volume!  Shipping will depend on the size of the "order" but I'll try to be as reasonable as possible.  If my flist knows anyone who would be interested in this, send them my way!

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I’m no longer going to be needed at Kids Club. And I know they do have fewer kids than they’d like so the reasoning is sound. I just know that my hours were greatly reduced after a debacle of sorts and just kept getting reduced. (Oh right, yeah, the debacle. I wasn’t all aboard playing Yatzee with some kids, didn’t mean to sound insubordinate, planned to play Apples To Apples once I got a chance and was also thinking I should watch the rest of the kids at the same time because everyone was busy. Well, my aunt, who is my boss, took it badly I guess and it was her boss, the principal, who told her not to fire me. So I got fewer hours after a week off to “think about it.” And then I got no more time in the library.) I’m fine not having it anymore but it does mean I need to find a new second job.

I will probably have regular good hours at Kohl’s now that I work in the cash office. I count the safe and the three registers that we keep in the safe and the bags from the other registers. (They keep each register at a certain amount and anything over that goes into the bag at the end of the day, which should be the amount taken in during the day.) Should take two hours, my fastest time was 2.5 hours. The holidays has made it crazy but I finished before lunch today, woo. Getting back into the game.

I actually want to move down south (well, further south) so I’m torn between looking for a second job here or a new job down there or a second job down there and attempt to transfer to another Kohl’s down there. I guess I could look into both. I also really really really need to donate stuff and throw out stuff and oh, I’m selling a TiVo Series 2 DVR and all my manga. If you are interested, we can work something out. I’ll make a post about the manga tomorrow and link it around LJ and post up on craigslist and Facebook.

The day after Thanksgiving was a long day at Kohl’s but it was so nice having a bagger helping. Haven’t really...

End of year review!

Look back at your entries for the year and take the first sentence of each month to sum it all up! LETS GO.

January: It may be a new year but some habits never go away...

February: blame ravenesquesky this time

March: What a combo, iPhoto face tagging and watching Reaper.

April: Yay, more lies!

May: It’s so much easier to just update Twitter because I have that app always open.

June: 1. You can ONLY answer ‘Yes’ or ‘No’.

July: Tonight shall be a grand night.

August: Leave me a comment asking for a letter if you want to play.

September: I’ve been working at Kids Club for three weeks now and Kohl’s for four.

October: I made that subject line in thinking with my own future but I find it funny that I would do so while watching FlashForward (which I love).

November: Holiday time!

December: Two memes right now and a third later because it’s more personal and I want to be able to protect it.

Okay, next year, totally doing less memes and more personal updates! Maybe even some fiction.