Review of chapter "Chapter One" from littleoldme
Cute fic- my fave line was the "wrack them?" one- very nicely done. There were a few grammar problems- most often, you omit the comma that's necessary before a person's name when they're being addresses. For example, it should be "yes, mother" not "yes mother." There's four or five of these errors in a relatively short space, so it's probably a good thing to watch out for in your writing in general.
Also, canon-wise, how could Dean have heard about Buffy for years and also thought there was no such thing as vampires for a really long time? Is this AU for Supernatural?
Review By [littleoldme
] • Date [4 Nov 06] • Not Rated