Large PrintHandheldAudioRating
using
 paypal
Twisting The Hellmouth Crossing Over Awards - Results
Rules for Challenges

A Matter of perception - The Beginning (HP)

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking
Review of chapter "The start of something great, terrible yes… but gr" from Dragonelf
Review:
I hope you get inspired to continue working on this story.

::Gives the plot bunny a cup of blueberry soup::

#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#
When one teaches, two learn.
- Robert Half
#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#
Review By [Dragonelf] • Date [10 Oct 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "The start of something great, terrible yes… but gr" from Obsidian
Review:
Have to say a very interesting story. I look forward to more.

Hmm ok now I'm Really confused. Why write the other stories if this one isn't completed to explain how it progressed to those stories? makes no sense and makes for a very disjointed story with no backstory to really explain what comes after the first incomplete story.

Can't really read the others, they now make no sense what so ever. not really.
Review By [Obsidian] • Date [11 Jun 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "The start of something great, terrible yes… but gr" from Grossclout
Review:
An interesting concept. A self-aware collection of nanites. Not new, but handled quite well with the merging of technology and magic. Also, a darker Harry than we normally see. Well done. I do have one problem, though. You identify this story as not completed. I believe this should be marked as completed. The 6 chapters that make up this story, complete it. Yes, the SERIES is not complete, but the individual stories within the series should be marked as complete when they are. It lets your readers know to look for the next part of the series and not to look forward to any more on this particular part of the series.
Review By [Grossclout] • Date [29 Dec 07] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "The start of something great, terrible yes… but gr" from banner
Review:
It's so perfectly ironic that Snape's Legilimens attack would be the trigger for the nanites to become self-aware and for Harry to start fully integrating with the AI. I wonder if he'll be more careful, or if Snape will just keep trying to abuse Harry? I'm trying not to think about how the lack of Harry's support will affect Hermione, and poor Neville.
It feels very odd not to have Hedwig around. I suppose that Harry doesn't have anyone to correspond with, and would have no wish for a pet. She'd just be another lever to be used against him. On the other hand, if Sirius plays his cards better in this story than in the books, the two of them could be a *mighty* force. I've never understood why Sirius was so easily marginalized by Dumbledore. AD was head of the Wizengamot: it was his JOB to ensure justice. Instead, an innocent man, one who had served Dumbledore faithfully, was sent to hell. And then Sirius just went right back to blindly obeying the old man. He's an Auror, a wealthy noble, and he's smart and savvy. At least he should be all that. Instead, he's little more than a minion.
I'm EXTREMELY poorly versed in the technology you've been using - I generally have to read the information about the nanites repeatedly. Can the nanites colonize Harry's wand, or do they need living tissue? Working through the wand as well as with it could be an incredibly efficient process. I've been learning a lot and having a wonderful time with this story. Thank you.
Review By [banner] • Date [15 Dec 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "The start of something great, terrible yes… but gr" from BlueScreen
Review:
Thankyou, thankyou thankyou.

I've been following this and the Chaos on the hellmouth sequel for some time, and am looking forward to more updates to both of them.
Review By [BlueScreen] • Date [12 Dec 07] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "The start of something great, terrible yes… but gr" from Ramenth
Review:
Woo! An update. I found this gem over the summer and forgot about it; but I definitely like the idea. I look forward to seeing where you go with it. :)
Review By [Ramenth] • Date [12 Dec 07] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "The Ancient Art of Praestantia" from Yojo
Review:
I love the concept of Praestantia; very interesting system. The way you described the supernatural was astounding. I loved how you made it seem so complex yet maintained the easy-to-understand mythical nature. Superb job.
Review By [Yojo] • Date [13 May 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Searching for Independence – Part 2" from Dreamweaver
Review:
Don't want to make too big a thing of it, but if it'd been me in ol' Dumble's shoes, there was on thing mentioned that would've raise SOME kind of warning bell. I mean, threstals are supposedly only seen by those that've seen death. If Harry'd been raised as sheltered, protected and whatever as he should've been, how the he** would he have been in any situation where that would've happened that he wound up able to see them?
Comments from author:
I figure that he assumed that Harry saw one of his parents die that night.

After all, what happened exactly wasn't known to anyone at that point in time. But his attraction to the threstals perhaps should have.

Thanks for reveiwing Dreamweaver, I hope you like what I have planned for the future.
Review By [Dreamweaver] • Date [7 May 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "The birth of 001-CSE" from (Past Donor)Jewel
Review:
Deeply disturbing. Looking forward to more.
Review By [(Past Donor)Jewel] • Date [5 May 07] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "The Ancient Art of Praestantia" from purrfus
Review:
Really delightful to see this update. I was a little worried you might have decided not to continue.
Comments from author:
Not happening - but real life issues are slowing my writing considerably.

Make sure you checkout the rest of this series as well

Thanks for reviewing
Review By [purrfus] • Date [20 Mar 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "The Ancient Art of Praestantia" from banner
Review:
Great chapter. Thanks for reinforcing my hatred of Lucius.
Your explanation about the nanites was thorough without overweighing the story.
It's fascinating watching young Potter think things through - I've always loved a smart, tough Harry. The only question is what House to go in ... I think this Harry is savvy enough to avoid Gryffindor. Gryffs tend to be eye-catching and boisterous. He'll probably end up in Slytherin, but Ravenclaw is also a good fit. I suspect your version of Harry would be too dangerous for Hufflepuff. Too many students trying to get too close...
Review By [banner] • Date [19 Mar 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Searching for Independence – Part 2" from purrfus
Review:
Still having a great time with this. The mixture of science and magic is really well done. Harry's personality continues to fascinate. More please.
Review By [purrfus] • Date [19 Jan 07] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Searching for Independence – Part 2" from VillageOrchid
Review:
This story continues to facinate me, but also be somewhat more dark than I'd like. Power-hungry, intelligent and manipulative Harry is a totally different personality, given the situation. There are some glimmers of hope, but if you continue to head him towards destroying the world I will probably not stay for the entire journey. What I did like was the wise-coldish-canny observations -- although some seemed to mature for him, regardless of life's experiences. On the science-fiction end, if fat stores are used to make more nannites, the boy is near starving that's not so good. Body will die if it doesn't have enough fat.
Comments from author:
I appreciate you taking the time to review this but since this is the epic introduction and back story to Chaos on the Hell Mouth - well you already know the ending. What you will be seeing is the twists and turns and challenges Harry encounters to shape who he is and who is to become. This will NOT have a happy ending that you are used to/asking for but Chaos on the hellmouth might.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [5 Dec 06] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Searching for Independence – Part 2" from banner
Review:
I'm enjoying this story - everything is coming together. I like this strong independent Harry. I hope he's good at "making friends," and how to use them...
Review By [banner] • Date [5 Dec 06] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Searching for Independence – Part 1" from misagoddess
Review:
Hmm. I read the other story first but this one is just as good. I see you are posting stories one and two simultaneously. That is unusual but I can read both at the same time. ;-)

I do think I like this first story a bit more than the other - I always like origin stories. It's nice to read about Powerful!Harry but I like to see *how* he got there. One of my favorite types of stories is where Harry does not seem to worship at Dumbledore's feet as much as he does in canon. Completely ignoring the fact that he let him be abused for ten years...well there is all the crap he put him through during school. But let me stop before I get on my soap box. Heh.

Excellent story! I will definitely be looking for more of this one and soon.
Comments from author:
I have written a fair amount more back story than what I have posted here but until I catch up with Chaos on the Hell Mouth I will be unable to post it.

Powerful!Harry aside - Not all things are going his way and he is by no means all powerful.
Review By [misagoddess] • Date [25 Nov 06] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Page: 1 of 2 next end
StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking