Fraggles? You added FRAGGLE ROCK TO A FAN FIC? LMAO God that is priceless. The whole scene where Fraser talks to his dad's ghost? Utterly hilarious. This was exceptionally well done!
Review By [bucksavage] • Date [14 Nov 12] • Not Rated
Found this series a few days ago and have loved reading them. The last scene is just perfect. Thanks so much for the series and I hope you keep on writing--and maybe post under your own name. Be sure and let all us lurkers who like your stuff know where you are.
Thanks for sharing BB
Review By [BillieBog] • Date [13 Feb 07] • Not Rated
Very enjoyable Due South is a great show and Cupid was another great show If Xander will be in Chicago with Cupid next will Due South visit? Oh, and hang up on Giles again Thanks
Review By [LFW] • Date [24 Dec 06] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Hey - in general, I've really been enjoying this series. Oddly enough, I didn't notice that this was actually part of the "places he's been" until I got to the end; at that point, I thought you were brining in a lot of unsupported crossovers. But then Xander started talking about a fraggle, and I realized the connection. So it was all good. :)
Anyway - good use of dialog for Fraiser. Xander came across as getting more world-weary, which I think was kind of the point. Also, I thought you did a decent job with writing Faith as cocky, but nervous about talking to Xander - good point about "when was the last time you fought a Slayer?" question.
Some critiques: I never really got a good feel for the surrounding area, though - nothing made it really feel like Chicago, IMO. Also, while I thought it was very clever to slip the slayer the potion in the drink, the whole setup seemed a bit off. The effort involved to permanenetly strip a Slayer of their power seemed, well, relatively paltry. I can easily see Xander downplaying the effort and risk involved (maybe it put the entire coven at serious risk, and only THAT coven could have done it due to their connection to Willow, and it's a spell that works only because there are so may Slayers now instead of just 1), but the way it was presented made the task seem mundane.
Recommendation - some extra establishing shots would work - more description of the landscape and whatnot. Also, maybe a paragraph or two of Xander relaxing afterwards, and remarking "phew, I'm sure glad that didn't kill of the Coven, like it almost did last time", or something along those lines - a place to put the expository dialog for how the potion actually worked, and why they don't use it more often. (Another thought - being a Slayer is still a likely path to an early death - lots of girls probably would WANT to un-become the Slayer. Is this process still available to them?)
Review By [KevinSchultz] • Date [27 Nov 06] • Not Rated
James