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All The Pretty Maids, Two By Two To Fall

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Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from clarityfades
Review:
I find this to be one of the more intriguing stories on this site. Your Dru voice is fantastic, & I loved the First's confusion & Dru's unwillingness to listen. Can't wait to find out how Buffy is 15 again, when she'll escape the buttheads holding her captive, & whether she's being held @ the same place as River. & I LURVE the idea that Spike will make an appearance in the Firefly time. & ooooooohhh, what's Willow gonna do that makes everything suck? Or did she do it already when she activated the Potentials? That would be kinda interesting.

Please update w/ more goodness! :D

P.S. & yes, I'm reading through some of your fics in no particular order for the fun of it. ;)
Review By [clarityfades] • Date [19 Nov 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from paradiso
Review:
great story, though I wish there would be some River/Jayne in the story.
Comments from author:
There may be some, I still haven't really decided. But right now, the story has been put on hold. I'm gonna start working on my stargate crossovers and Harry Potter one for a while first.
Review By [paradiso] • Date [10 Jul 07] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from (Past Donor)halfbloodpuffskin
Review:
Gah, I 'eep!'ed when I saw the blue gloves part...scarier than the Reavers, they are!

Can't wait for the rest! How in the 'verse did Buffy become 15?!
Comments from author:
Thank you! It has something to do with how she "died" and all of this is set after season seven on Buffy as well.

Happy that you enjoyed it. I think you'll like what I have planned for Mal. Poor, poor Mal. LOL.
Review By [(Past Donor)halfbloodpuffskin] • Date [11 Jun 07] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from Lisa
Review:
So glad to see that this piece is going to be continued. Nice chapter and creepy!!!
Comments from author:
Thanks! All of my stories are to be continued, it's just finishing the chapters that's draggin me down at the moment, that and having two jobs.
Review By [Lisa] • Date [10 Jun 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from DemonChildeKyra
Review:
This is progressing very nicely! I can't wait for more of Dru! And like I said in my e-mail, you did a really good job of getting Buffy's confusion across.

~ Kyra
Comments from author:
Thank You!

Especially for all the help!
Review By [DemonChildeKyra] • Date [10 Jun 07] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from FirstQueen
Review:
I would swear I read this chapter somewhere before. Is it a repost?
Comments from author:
Only partially, I took most of the story down for heavy revisions, about 1/4 of the chapter I put up is of the original draft, everything else I've changed.

Sorry for the confusion.
Review By [FirstQueen] • Date [10 Jun 07] • Rating [6 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Two" from musiclover
Review:
love it when dru's in a story makes it all the better because here loony sentances mark the sweater ooopppsss sorry i just wanted to do something like dru for a scond love it
Comments from author:
LOL. She's a fun one to write. And you'll be seeing some River soon too, they are certainly more interesting.

Thank you.
Review By [musiclover] • Date [1 Jun 07] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Two" from DemonChildeKyra
Review:
Oh wow, this one is starting out really good! I love Dru, she's one of my all-time favorite BtVS characters. If you still need a beta I'd be glad to help out, just let me know. I check my e-mail every night, usually more than once, so it shouldn't ever take me too long to get back to you about anything. Anyway, just wanted to let you know that I like your story and that I'm available if you still need a beta. Like I said, just let me know!

~ Kyra
Comments from author:
Thank you!

I am still looking for a beta... well, actually, I need some one who can serve as a listening board and tell when I am getting to outlandish. I pulled most of the original story and am redoing it. If you wouldn't mind listening to me ramble on about the story let me know.
Review By [DemonChildeKyra] • Date [16 May 07] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Two" from Lisa
Review:
Very intriguing. How will Dru send Buffy into Firefly/Serenity verse? So curious!
Comments from author:
Well, Dru won't be sending Buffy into the Firefly verse, but, she does know what will happen and sad for every one else, she is the only one who does.

Thank you for your review!
Review By [Lisa] • Date [30 Apr 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from Lisa
Review:
You write Dru really well. I find her one of the harder characters to get the voice right. Well done!

Looking forward to what you have planned!
Comments from author:
Thank you!

I always thought she was one of the more interesting characters and very underused, which is why I put her in for a bit.
Review By [Lisa] • Date [30 Apr 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Two" from Voldemort
Review:
I am glad you did have time to update the story.

It's a good begin and I'm curious, how you will continue the story.
I like Dru, is she related to River or is River a slayer/descendant of Buffy ?

I also hope you will bring Spike in the story, I understand he is "alive" from "He'll follow her across the stars and never look back
Comments from author:
River will be a Buffy descendent. No, she won't be a slayer, Buffy will be the only one, I am heavily and I do mean heavily revising it, originally I had where it had some of present day Buffy, but, I am cutting that out and jumping straight to a few years before the series.

Spike will be coming in as well. I love Spike too much not to, but, it won't be a Spuffy.

You'll hear a bit more about how Dru became involved although you won't get to see her after this escept maybe for a couple of flashbacks.
Review By [Voldemort] • Date [3 Apr 07] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Two" from Ellie
Review:
I can't wait to see where you take this. I don't see any obvious need for a beta but I hope you find one. Thanks so much for posting. Excellent job capturing Drusilla and her way of speaking. You were able to drop clues while still maintaining her vague stream-of-consciousness way of expressing herself.

Please post more soon!

-Ellie
Comments from author:
Thank you! I've been trying, I wasn't happy with how the story originally was, which was why I decided to redo it.

Thank you for the review.

I need a beta more for bouncing ideas off of and I hope I find one as well! Betas and reviewers make the world go 'round.

Dru is fun to write, I love her character, and I wanted to have a nice redemption for her.

Thank you again,

Trish

aka- heathenseyes
Review By [Ellie] • Date [31 Mar 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Two" from queenevil
Review:
Is she going to be RIVER?! WHOA!
Comments from author:
LOL.

No, but, I did want a link between River and the supernatural. You'll... uhh, be surprised about how things will progress. I'm trying to flesh out the story more then it had been. Hopefully things will be going a lot more quickly.

There's lots and lots of surprises in store. I think you'll like.

And the person from Mal's past will be Buffy, just a little spoiler and you'll get a little reason as to his dislike of companions. Muhahahaha!

;-)

Thanks for the review!!!
Review By [queenevil] • Date [31 Mar 07] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of story "All The Pretty Maids, Two By Two To Fall" from queenevil
Review:
Defintely curious on how this going to go....
Comments from author:
Thank you!!! I'm thinking of revising the story some though. See if I can make things a little more cohesive. But I've already got everything already mapped out. Poor Serenity's crew, they don't even knw what going to hit them!
Review By [queenevil] • Date [27 Jan 07] • Rating [10 out of 10] • Edit Comment
Review of story "All The Pretty Maids, Two By Two To Fall" from UnlikelyStory
Review:
To start with the positive, your story is very readable in the sense that there are very few grammatical and spelling errors to distract the reader. People underestimate how important this is, and I thank you for making the effort.

The main problem is that there is so little continuity that it is difficult for the reader to stay focused. Granted, it is very fun to weave together different storylines and perspectives, but this is especially hard to do successfully, particularly in fanfic where there are many other stories to be read that are straightforward and coherent. I can tell that you plan this to be a long, complexly-plotted story by the fact that it's the first in a series, but if I could make a suggestion, it would be that you give the reader a comprehensible set of introductory chapters so they get sucked into the world you've created and are interested enough to try to figure out any leaps in time and place you make later on. I'm not saying you should succumb to readers' clamorings that you give everything away at the beginning, but readers want to have some sense of where you are and where you're going (especially when there's a large crossover involved, like Firefly), at least by the sixth or seventh chapter. If they don't, it gets too discouraging to continue.

I'm sorry if the criticism was a little much, but I think that you can write well and could create a very enjoyable story with a little more planning and attention to the needs of the reader. Don't give up!
Comments from author:
Thanks, sorry for the confusion. I tried warning on some of the early chapters and reviews that there would be some jumping around but it won't be for much longer. Buffy will be 'dying' again soon, and once she does there will be some references to what happened after her death, but everything will be mainly in the same time line.
Review By [UnlikelyStory] • Date [24 Jan 07] • Not Rated • Edit Comment
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