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Bar Fly

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Review of chapter "Bar Fly" from Vassago
Review:
Who was talking when?

You can use the enter button, as evidenced when you did so in the narration, so please continue to use it during the dialogue. It'd also help if you actually used a speech act (Xander Said, "This is a speech act").
Review By [Vassago] • Date [21 Apr 10] • Rating [4 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Bar Fly" from spring
Review:
I like it
Review By [spring] • Date [14 Jun 08] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Bar Fly" from MichelleWinchester
Review:
You write with an accent. :) Where are you from? You totally could write a 'Firefly' story!
As for this one, It was good. To make it great, you need more!!!! Like maybe having the Xan-man go to San Fran and Pheobe having a vision of him in danger. Then have Prue react to meeting her 'dream' guy! :)
Comments from author:
Thanks for the compliment. I 'd have tosee if my muse likes the idea.She might make me right it. So keep lookin for updates it might happen.
Review By [MichelleWinchester] • Date [4 Sep 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Bar Fly" from Bobboky
Review:
sweet work
Review By [Bobboky] • Date [4 Sep 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Bar Fly" from neverwill
Review:
Not bad, but it was Oxnard not Oxford. I'm assuming this was an early instance of Pru's astral projecting power? Will Xander eventually make it to San Fran and P3 (they 'meet' in various bars along the way) or is this as far as the "romance" goes?
Comments from author:
Good question...I leave it open for anybody willing but my muse says this story is done for me.
Review By [neverwill] • Date [3 Sep 07] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Bar Fly" from PATM
Review:
I side with Starchild on the real name of that town. I've seen plenty
of bumper stickers posing the query "Whats an Oxnard?"
Now,Xander in Oxford!
Review By [PATM] • Date [2 Sep 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Bar Fly" from starchild
Review:
Interesting. And it was Oxnard not Oxford.
Review By [starchild] • Date [2 Sep 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Bar Fly" from jupitersdaughter
Review:
Oh that was so cool and I think I get it! Awesome story!
Review By [jupitersdaughter] • Date [2 Sep 07] • Rating [10 out of 10]
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