It seems sort of interesting, although I generally dislike this type of story. However, I did want to let you know that you lose muchos points for spelling magic with a k, because despite the claims of Crowley and his modern philosophical descendants, it is quite possibly the most hilariously pretentious thing anyone can do when speaking on the subject. Quite apart from the subject of whether or not it is a legitimate spelling (for some people, it is, for exactly the reasons you have described in your narration), it just plain looks silly and overblown. It begs you not to take it seriously, and draws a sense of ironic amusement into the narration, which loses the gravitas you attempt to impart by spending half of your first chapter with a lecture instead of, say, plot development.

While I appreciate your review and the chance for your feedback, I feel that since you feel it necessary to give me the grammatical history of "magick" vs. "magic" I need to point out that this site/ genre/ media is for little more than self-gratification and meaningless mental masturbation. And, whereas you choose to point out Crowley and his 'modern philosophical descendants,' I can only say in my defense that it has more to do with neurolinguistic manipulation, which we can debate the origins of for quite sometime. Again, I appreciate such a critical review of a single chapter I put up here quite a while ago, but it's f*cking fanfiction.

Very interesting beginning! I look forward to seeing where it goes and how long its takes Adam to lose his mind.

{snicker} Don't have the fallout shelter, but do have the fatalistic mindset considering I'm downwind of a primary target along a normal weather track though I'm not as close as Adam was to NORAD. Any chance of more chapters any time soon? Pretty please? I hope your schedule and muse will allow you to write and post more chapters sometime soon. Keep up the good work. Zafaran {mailto:} zafaran {at} fastmail {dot} fm

Really looking forward to more of this

"It’s not often you meet a man with his own fallout shelter next to a primary target"

Considering the targeting methods in those days, probably the safest place to be!

jen

I'm intrigued... update soon please.

Good intro, totally looking forward to the next chapter.

P.S. Major LOLs:
"However, the most saturated in every kind of Magick and magic in the Western hemisphere was an itty bitty, teeny tiny, tourist trap in the Colorado Rockies. Sound familiar? Well that’s because with the exclusion of the front range, all towns in the Colorado Rockies are itty bitty, teeny tiny tourist traps."
It's hilarious because it's true. *dead from laughs*

An interesting opening, I'm intrigued. You've done a good job of introducing the characters and I look forward to seeing where this is going.

Who's the second boy? There didn't seem to be any real clues - unlike for Harry Potter.

I like it! Please write more and update soon.

Seems interesting enough.

Oh fun. A very good start. I look forward to seeing where you go from here. Keep writing.

Please add a disclaimer - Rule 10.

Demona
TtH Mod

Thanks for the reminder, I'm an idiot!

Kinda weird but interesting.

Its a bit rushed for the number of characters and moves so far but maybe doable for an introduction as long as it slows down.

I'll be watching for the next installment.