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Dawning Knight

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Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.2" from DarthTenebrus
Review:
Perhaps linking the two worlds together as a Key ability of hers would enable Dawn to return eventually to her own world with her new friends in tow? How's that for an eventual plot bunny? Then she can bring on the revengey goodness to Ethan Rayne for getting her stuck in that universe, having to run around on Taris, Kashyyyk, Tattooine and a few others, hmm?

"Ethan, I got some splaining to do here, you Chaos mage, me Key, me bring 55 gal drum of whoop ass and dump it on you now..."
Review By [DarthTenebrus] • Date [13 Jul 12] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.2" from Addlcove
Review:
Just re-read these three chapters and I am still eagerly awaiting the return of your muse :)
Review By [Addlcove] • Date [28 Aug 09] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.2" from FireFlash
Review:
A nice beginning for a story that shows promise. I would argue that all of these three chapters are parts of the 'prologue.' However, that may just be my preference for long chapters showing. I look forward to reading more.
Review By [FireFlash] • Date [27 May 08] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.2" from Addlcove
Review:
eagerly awaiting an update on this, actually made me start a new game of KoToR :)
Comments from author:
I'm glad you're enjoying it. I kind of got stuck on it, then lost my muse. I don't want to just completely recap the game with Dawn along as an observer, and had some ideas on what I wanted to do, but ran up against a wall.

I'm working on some other stories right now, but I want to get back to it eventually. Hopefully someday soon. :-)
Review By [Addlcove] • Date [10 Apr 08] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.2" from TonyTheJew
Review:
So will dawn know Mission or Z? Or will she know Canderous? Would she be a Mandalorian?
And dam your cliffhanger!... up-date soon
Comments from author:
Dawn will only know what she's seen in the game (up to the point where the escape pod leaves the ship towards the very beginning) and what she's seen in the movies (Ep. I, IV, V, VI are all that have come at at this point in the story), so she's only heard Bastila's name and has only seen a video game rendering of Carth. She will get to know other characters as the story progresses.
Review By [TonyTheJew] • Date [18 Feb 08] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.2" from (Past Donor)Ponder
Review:
Aww, can't end it there? *bounce bounce* Want next chapter! :)

> A long time ago in a galaxy far,

far away….

That's a non-printable character there at the start of the second line, and did you mean to have a line break there?


> (except for the American standards for punction within quotation marks, which I feel is retarded and the British convention makes eminently more sense).

Your quote character usage looked fine to me. What "American" convention were you eschewing, and what do you believe is the better replacement?

*** Ponder
Comments from author:
> A long time ago in a galaxy far,
> far away

Thanks for pointing out the weird character. It looked fine on my mac, but I've edited it. As for the formatting, yes, that is intentional to have a line break there--that is how it appears in the game and in the movies.

As for the conventions using punctuation within quotations, I'm specifically referring to placing full stops, question marks, etc., within the quotation marks at the end of sentences. In American usage, if the end of the quotation is at the end of the sentence, then you'd place the punctuation within the quotation marks, regardless of whether the original quote had the same punctuation. In British usage, if the punctuation isn't part of the quote, it is placed outside the quote. For example, if I'm referring to something said, in US usage, it would be:
Did he really say, "green trees?"
Even if the original statement being referred to wasn't a question, American usage puts the question mark inside the quotes.

British usage would have the same sentence as:
Did he really say, "green trees"?
If the original statement was not a question. Of course, if it was a question, the question mark would go inside the quotes.

Now that I think about it, this really shouldn't become (much of) an issue in writing fictional prose, it is more of a stylistic concern in writing for research or reporting. Although, I suppose a quote within a quote used in fiction could face the same choices for style.
Review By [(Past Donor)Ponder] • Date [18 Feb 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.2" from CPTSkip
Review:
Argh! Evil cliffhanger! Bad cliffhanger! No cliffhanger biscuits! I think this is a great start to a plot with a lot of potential. I can't wait to see Dawn kick some butts in the Star Wars universe. Please update asap! I've finished my homework and want more story. Lol!
Comments from author:
Sorry to leave you hanging like that. It is a good place for a chapter break, though. I'll try to update as soon as possible, but since the weekend's now over, I have to go back to work. Soon, though.
Review By [CPTSkip] • Date [18 Feb 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.2" from (Recent Donor)MissingAuthor
Review:
You have definitely caught my attention... really looking forward to see where you go with this!

Wispr
Comments from author:
Thanks! High praise, indeed. I hope that I don't disappoint you.
Review By [(Recent Donor)MissingAuthor] • Date [18 Feb 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Getting There is Half the Fun, pt.1" from TonyTheJew
Review:
Nice set up so far, But I can't wait for Dawn to get in to the game. So will Dawn have any powers or just pick up skills as she goes? And If she does have powers will they be Jedi or from her Keyness?
Comments from author:
You have asked the two questions that I have struggled with in deciding how I want to approach this story. I don't want to give too much away, but Dawn will be put into the KOTOR universe exactly as she was when she left Sunnydale: a 14 y.o. schoolgirl, who also happens to be the Key.
Review By [TonyTheJew] • Date [17 Feb 08] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue" from TonyTheJew
Review:
so is Dawn going to be the main character in the game? I hope she make more grey choose and not black and white, After all she did grow up in sunnyhell.
Comments from author:
Thanks for the review. I agree with you about the game: it's annoying that it semi-forces you to only go all light or all dark. Also, the game only makes light/dark choices based on dialog choices, but oddly enough doesn't penalize a light-side character for, say, draining someone's energy using dark-side powers. Once Dawn's in that universe, things will be a bit more realistic.
Review By [TonyTheJew] • Date [10 Feb 08] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue" from Satori
Review:
A fanfic that actually pairs up mission? In a non-objectionable way? AWESOME.
Comments from author:
That's the plan, anyway. I'm not entirely sure what you mean by non-objectionable, but I plan to keep it fairly PG, or maybe slightly PG-13 -- they are both 14, after all. Thanks for reading and reviewing.
Review By [Satori] • Date [28 Jan 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue" from Cali
Review:
Not really sure about this, but the summary and the fact it's about Dawn had peaked my interest. Hope you continue soon.
Comments from author:
Thanks for reading. This is just a quick setup for what's to come. Not sure how quickly I'll be able to update -- I wanted to have several chapters written before I started posting, but for some retarded reason I decided to post this as soon as I had written it.
Review By [Cali] • Date [27 Jan 08] • Rating [5 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue" from CPTSkip
Review:
Excellent start. You did a very nice job with both characters' voices. You setup is just nifty and I can't wait for more. Dawn with a light saber, won't Glory be surprised? Lol!
Comments from author:
Thanks. Glad you liked it. I sort of have in mind where I want to go with this, and I'm trying to avoid plot devices that have been done to death. I hadn't thought as far ahead as what happens with Glory when Dawn gets back, but I'll keep that in mind.
Review By [CPTSkip] • Date [27 Jan 08] • Not Rated
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