Review of chapter "Chapter One" from DeepBlueJoy
This would be a nine or ten if you had given enough background. For anyone who hadn't seen the episode, it's hard to know what's going on. For those who have, however, it's a great story. I love the idea. I love Lindsay and I think you wrote her well. My only other quibble is that the story ended too abruptly. You wouldn't want the kid to be taken home, you'd want the EMS on the scene immediately. Or better yet, not get shot... but we can't have everything. His being shot works better dramatically.
I too didn't like how that episode ended up. What I wouldn't give to be or have a seer every now and again!
Merry Christmas and/or whatever else you may celebrate. Have a great new year.
Review By [DeepBlueJoy
] • Date [25 Dec 08] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from JoeB
This could be a good story, I think. You need to add a lot of back story to this for it to make more sense.
Review By [JoeB
] • Date [28 Aug 08] • Not Rated