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Shattered Innocence

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Review of chapter "Epilogue" from BrownFinderth
Review:
WONDERFUL! IN THAT BUFFY & DRACO ARE GETTING CLOSER!!!!
Review By [BrownFinderth] • Date [26 Nov 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Epilogue" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Sweet and relationship-angsty ending... but nicely done furthering the AU plot.
Comments from author:
Thank you. I am a fan of angst. ;)
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [9 Oct 09] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Twelve" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Enjoying the AU outcome of that event. Though his blood was spilled and perhaps could be collected. I do wonder what they will do for the summer, because if she leaves the grounds the watchers might find her... unless perhaps a tailisman is made by some of the teachers?
Comments from author:
The watchers aren't looking. Because she died so early, it was barely a blip in the time line to them, the next was chosen within a day of the previous one dying. The summer details are now up in the third story. Thanks for the reviews.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [9 Oct 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eight" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Actually, if you're going to follow parts of the books without much change, I like that most of that happens off camera.
Comments from author:
Thank you. The next stories are going to progressively ignore more of the books, so hopefully the format will continue to work as well.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [9 Oct 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Okay, so Buffy is deliberately Mary-Sue in this story, but the angst and plot combined with the characters are interesting. The everyone can't help but love her and want to protect her (until she ends up loving them all and protecting them all) may wear a little thin on me. I appreciate the effort in twisting the worlds together, and your writing is pretty good.
Comments from author:
I wouldn't say deliberately Mary-Sue. I tried to keep it as minimal as possible (you should have seen my first drafts) but I do tend towards Mary-Sueism. And you shouldn't worry about the love and protecting wearing thin, because in the third story Buffy is going to make a big mistake, and the people around her are going to react... well, you'll see. Thanks for the review, and hopefully you'll enjoy what's coming.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [9 Oct 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Five" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Having the phophesy and Buffy being chosen, looks like it will lead to some AU plot.... very interesting.
Comments from author:
So very Au. Thanks for the review.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [9 Oct 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from VillageOrchid
Review:
You missed a really imporant word in regards to giving Draco the antidote for the sleeping potion. Also it wasn't clear who brewed it, the students as part of the assignment or if it was given by the teacher.
I am curious if Buffy knows how Harry has been treated by Snape because Giles and Jocye told her, or if it was because of a dream, or if it was because of how Buffy and Harry shared thoughts on the train.
Comments from author:
What was the word?

Sorry that it wasn't clear. The assignment was that one student made the sleeping drought, and the other the antidote.

Buffy knows about the treatment by watching them interact and listening to the trios Snape stories. Giles and Joyce had no idea about Harry, and the thoughts on the train were only enough to let them know who they were in relation to each other, not to fill in details of their lives up until that point.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [9 Oct 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Very interesting AU keeping *most* of the personality traits, but changing the circumstances drastically.
Comments from author:
Thank you. I find the best review is that the personality of the characters still comes through the twisting of the universe.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [9 Oct 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Epilogue" from winnie
Review:
Good story. Thanks for the work.
Comments from author:
Thank you. Glad your enjoying it.
Review By [winnie] • Date [18 Apr 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Epilogue" from Chosenfire
Review:
Wow....this is amazing.

I usually hate AUs, they take away from the characters and are cliched, boring, and not what I really like to spend my time reading but I adored this one. The story you worked out was easy to picture and follow, you write the characters beautifully and Buffy is still Buffy. I am a fan of the whoe Buffy is a Potter angle and you did it really well.

My favorite thing though would have to be the Buffy/Draco relationship. I am a fan of the pairing and this has got to the best written one I have found so far. You write them so beautifully and believeble. I am a fan of your Draco, you are definitely talented.

Great job and I will look out for the next parts :D
Comments from author:
Wow! Uh... Wow! Wow. Thank you so much for the review. I'm glad you enjoyed the story, and hope what's to come doesn't disappoint. I'm always glad to get feedback on my character voices (especially encouraging feedback like that) because that's really all that makes AU still cross over. Stay tuned, more Draco/Buffy to come.
Review By [Chosenfire] • Date [12 Nov 08] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Epilogue" from spring
Review:
I love this fic. It's wonderful. I really really love how you finished the Challenges for the Tri Wizard Tournament. I am eager to read the next in this series.
Comments from author:
Thank you! The next in the series should be updated soon.
Review By [spring] • Date [7 Nov 08] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Epilogue" from (Past Donor)Fritolays
Review:
Great story! I'm assuming by part 2, you mean Growing Older? I can't wait for that story to be updated! Great writing :)
Comments from author:
Thanks. Growing Older will be updated... eventually. Sigh. I have to work on writing the third part, but I should be back to putting it up in December. Thanks for the review.
Review By [(Past Donor)Fritolays] • Date [31 Oct 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Epilogue" from (Past Donor)FireDragon
Review:
Oh that was sweet and kind of sad. Poor Draco.
Comments from author:
He does get the short end of the Destiny stick some days. But he's in good company. Thanks for the review.
Review By [(Past Donor)FireDragon] • Date [31 Oct 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Twelve" from AllenPitt
Review:
gee, poor Voldy, foiled again. He's about out of options, too (admitted in book #4 that he'd about given up hope at this point). Surely he will prevail!
Might be time to bring something in from the slayer world. Maybe Voldy hires Spike to help him out or something?
Comments from author:
No quite Spike. But don't worry about poor little Voldemort. He's got another trick up under his sleeve. Prevailing is his strong suit.

:)

Thanks for the review.
Review By [AllenPitt] • Date [30 Oct 08] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Twelve" from (Past Donor)FireDragon
Review:
Not to be negitive or anything but with the false Mad Eye out of the way the same things in the race wouldn't have happened. He used the Imperious Curse on Krumb to get him to attack Cedric with the Crutacious. And Mad Eye was behind Flur's defeat also. I can understand it would be easier to write it the same way but it just didn't make sense to me.

aside from that I loved how Draco stood up for Buffy. It was so sweet and how touched he was when she was worried about him.
Comments from author:
Oh. I did not read my book closely enough, did I? Hmm. Mmmkay. Right now I'm going to leave that, but thanks for pointing it out. I will go back and fix it, because that wasn't laziness, so much as gross oversight. Sigh. Thanks for letting me know. And I promise, baring blindness or complete amensia, I will fix that.

Thanks for the review.
Review By [(Past Donor)FireDragon] • Date [29 Oct 08] • Not Rated
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