Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from dogbertcarroll
Review By [dogbertcarroll
] • Date [23 Feb 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from Jarvey
Comments from author:
Review By [Jarvey
] • Date [29 Dec 08] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Six" from Muadzin
What? No other reviews? Guess I'm the first then.
Can't say its the best story I've ever read, but it was enjoyable in its own right. And I can think of a lot of worse stories. Plus I'm a sucker for anything that has something of an B/X in it. ;) Keep going and don't let the lack of reviews deter you. Sometimes the shittiest stories get lots of them and the better ones, pfff, nothing. That's the way it is sometimes.
Couple of nitpicks though:
- Xander should know Spike was alive as he saw him when Buffy took care of the Judge, which happens before your story.
- Keep an eye on your formatting. You used italics for thinking, but that would require keeping an eye on the [I] en [/I] tags. Now whole chapters were in italics, which looks sloppy.
- While you seem very knowledgable about guns I'm not sure a bullet through the head can kill a vamp in the Buffyverse. Nor should a riot gun. Not unless it causes some explosive reaction.
Comments from author:
My excuse is. . . I was very, very drunk. :)
No, actually my real excuse is that I wrote this story about ten years ago, and I like to think that I've gotten better.
If I remember correctly, Spike was not at the mall with the Judge, as he was crippled in a wheelchair by that time.
Fixed the formating. Those little '/' can really mess things up, no?
It is canon that bullets do not affect vampires and demons they way they do normal humans, essentially because they are stronger and have no real blood pressure (no heart beat). However, their nervous system (particularly the spine cord and brain) and bones and joints (knees, mostly) can be physically damaged and while they do regenerate, it takes a while (look at Spike and the wheelchair). So if someone aims carefully and hits a lower joint or the spinal cord or the brain itself with a bullet, it will stop a vamp. A shotgun round will cause massive damage depending when it hits, and buckshot to the head will effectively decapitate and dust a vampire. The only real reason not to use guns close up with vamps is that they can overwhelm a shooter, and you need to be very accurate for the rounds to work, which is harder than it looks.
Thanks for reading my story, and sorry for the delay in answering your FB.
Review By [Muadzin
] • Date [26 Dec 08] • Not Rated