First, I really enjoy the writing. Keep up the good work!
I have to ask though, was your emphasizing Buffy and Willow's bad qualities while minimizing their good ones a deliberate modification of their characters for the purposes of telling the story, or an expression of your dislike of those two characters?
Review By [BaronScrewtape] • Date [8 Jul 12] • Not Rated
I know one thing that Zarina (the gender-bent Xander) did during that stretch - *training*. (Zatanna - like all of Clan Z - is a firm believer in training, and lots of practice - the jock approach to magic. The "stage magician" aspect is part of the Purlioned Letter method - hide in plain sight. It also keeps you from being invited as the main course at Barbecue Battles - burned at the stake.) While Xander is basically Zatanna's clone, due to age, she's more Zatanna's "daughter". (And thanks to her usual "stage magician" costume, Zatanna gets almost as many passes as a certain Amazonian Princess of Thermyscira - and *more* than Hawkgirl - and that is just from the males - and a few females that swing that way - of the League's members and associates - let alone villains, stalkers, and the general DCU fanbase.)
Review By [SledgeHammer] • Date [16 Dec 11] • Rating [8 out of 10]
It started out good, got better, and then went insane! But I do like the redeemed Dru. I got started reading fanfiction with Ranma 1/2. So the stories of Xander turned girl are fun reads. Thanks for sharing the story.
Review By [Rune] • Date [27 Jun 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
A BIT ambiguous about the ease with which Xander/Zarina adapts to being a woman, but you definitely have some interesting moments here; ‘Spectrum’s’ powers were definitely original (Even if I think it implausible for a random mass-mutation event to give one person THAT much power), and the Black Lantern crisis was fairly effective (Although I still feel that an entire superhero team on that scale for one town is overdoing it)...
In the end, however, my central problem is simple; Drusilla ASKS for a chance to redeem herself and she’s OK- even if I still see her as a lunatic-, but why do we have so many people treating Angel like a monster incapable of redemption because of Angelus’s crimes when he technically wasn’t there when they were committed- and hence had NOTHING to do with what his body did when it didn’t have a soul in it-, and is STILL trying to make up for what Angelus did when he doesn’t even technically have to?
It’s been established in a couple of cases that the soul is the very ESSENCE of the person’s self in the Buffyverse; constantly holding Angel responsible for Angelus’s crimes just because Angelus didn’t ASK for a soul hardly seems fair (If anything, shouldn’t Angel get extra ‘points’ because he’s actually trying to do the right thing even if it’ll never make up for what he did?), given that he clearly ISN’T Angelus and is actually keeping the bastard locked up...
I admit I’m slightly biased given that Angel’s my favourite character, but I felt it needed to be said.
Comments from author:
I'm glad you are giving an honest reply. I like good constructive criticism as it helps me iron out my work. Yes, an entire superhero team for Sunnydale is overdoing it but I'm going to have plenty of villains to attack Sunnydale.
I agree with you about people being character bias towards Angel. Have you noticed that the same people who are bias towards Angel seem to be OKAY with Spike. Spike doesn't even try for redemption. His only reason for being in the good fight is that he gets a good fight out of it. I hope I didn't fall into the catergory of bias towards Angel. I'll be honest though, Drusilla is my favorite character.
I don't mind your mini-rant.
Review By [MarcusSLazarus] • Date [24 May 10] • Rating [5 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Blackest Night Part Two: Midnight" from Peaslums
Review:
While I like the story, the part with Willow getting adopted just seems wrong. Only a few chapters ago, she was stripped of her powers and now she is given even more power than she had before. Not to mention that she's not limited by calling on gods now. It's almost as if she was being rewarded. Also, from what I can see, she still wants to separate the two, what's to keep her from doing so?
EDIT: Just noticed your response now, but what I meant was what changed from Willow's chance of separating the two after she tried the first time other than her likelihood of succeeding now that she has more power? The groups you mentioned should have been there to stop her the first time, and that turned out well.
It seems like a kid who stabbed someone was then given a gun, to use a real world comparison. Same people would be angry if it was used wrongly. Continuing the simile, it just seems like Willow was given the gun rather than being taught responsible use of the knife. The characters seemed to have just completely forgotten the incident as soon as it ended.
Comments from author:
What's to stop her from doing it again? The Justice League, Justice Society, Teen Titans, and numerous others who might be offended if she did.
Review By [Peaslums] • Date [23 May 10] • Not Rated
I liked your story a lot. As I've mentioned before, I felt like I was reading a good comic book. The action was way over the top and your plot kept having zigging off in wild directions. But you did a very nice job with everyones' characters and you did a good job with your dialog. I look forward to more of your story.
Comments from author:
I appreciate what you have said about this story and I hope to continue earning that praise.
Great job on the new chapter, I hope you'll update your other stories soon.
Review By [JediKnight] • Date [1 May 10] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Blackest Night: Part Three: Dawn" from BarbarossaRotbart
Review:
This story is really not bad, but I think that your characters are a little bit too powerfull. Spectrum reminds me of Halo, Jade and especially Rainbow Girl of Subs, but the power to summon certain rings and batteries is imho too much. And the colour she uses should be linked to her emotional state. Calypso is also too powerfull. Normal Amazons are only human without any superpowers (Artemis needed both the Sandals of Hermes and the Gauntlets of Atlas to get as powerfull as Diana, Diana was blessed by the gods, Donna is Diana's identical twin and Cassie got her powers from her father Zeus). Only the 'recreated' Donna had some special powers against evil, because she was really innocent. So giving Calypso a power that makes her more powerfull than one of the Wonder Women is also too much. Blue Bowman. I really hate this character. A superb archer with the canary cry? I would remove either the cry or the achery skill. And I would also have removed his relation to GA and BC from the story. Zarina has also a big problem. That is not her power, but her training and her relationship with nearly all famous super-heroes. That makes her a Mary Sue. Remove her martial arts training and keep Batman distrusting her. Your solution to the Blackest Night is also not really original but a near copy of the original solution. I would have prefered a more Buffy-like approach with magic and Buffy kicking a$$. But it is your story.
Review of chapter "Blackest Night: Part Three: Dawn" from Dragonelf
Review:
You have done a good job with this chapter and I am glad to hear that you will be writing a sequel once you have completed this story.
::Gives the plot bunny a a bowl of Egg Drop Soup::
#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=# To err is human--and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben #=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#=#
Review By [Dragonelf] • Date [20 Apr 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Blackest Night: Part Three: Dawn" from LFW
Review:
I have not read this since Willows power was sealed, so I am a bit curious as to how hyenaXander did not return, unless he is not part of her? I am confused by hyenaXander running around. Otherwise I enjoyed the whole fic and I have to admit that Justice League Sunnydale and Sunnydale Big Band are impressive ideas. Although, they are not as impressive as your first idea, which was Xander's costume. Hoping for more. Thanks
Review By [LFW] • Date [19 Apr 10] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Blackest Night: Part Three: Dawn" from JediKnight
Review:
Great work on the new chapter, I hope you'll post more soon.
-What fanfic of yours will you work on next?
Review By [JediKnight] • Date [19 Apr 10] • Rating [10 out of 10]