I do have to say, however, that chapter 5 has a lot of issues, the main being beteween first and third person (I/Faith) and proper use of me/my she/he. ;)
Review By [Rhyssia] • Date [10 Dec 09] • Not Rated
although this is a wonderful chapter it has a lot of mistakes. You swiched pov from third to first person.You also mentioned earlyer about Faith not being able to spar with the Cullens because of the fear that they might not be able to control themselves if she started to blead and then you claim that she is sparing with Jasper the one with the least amount of controle. I look forward to the next installment.
Comments from author:
Thanks I changed the first/third person mistakes. I am writing a story in first person at the moment and I keep getting them confused. I also changed the bit about Jasper sparring with Faith. They still do, but Faith was the one the one that lowered the rules. As for him having the least amount control. This is where her 'predator sense' kicks in. It will be explained later I promise.
Review By [spring] • Date [9 Dec 09] • Rating [10 out of 10]
You had me really confused when Trick came in to the picture until I remembered no derect sun light! I love this chapter the worry that Faith has is just rolling off the story. As you can tell (I hope) I love this chapter and I eagerly await the next installment.
Review By [spring] • Date [6 Nov 09] • Rating [10 out of 10]
oooh!! awesome-ness! cant wait for more! are u going to pair faithy up with someone?
Review By [Missingviolet] • Date [6 Nov 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Welcome To Forks" from KzintiKiller
Review:
Is this post-New Moon? It can't be if if Rose, Jasper, and Emmett are still in school. So how are the wolves involved this soon? Jacob shouldn't be chasing after Bella yet.
KK
Comments from author:
The Cullens know about the wolves, but Bella doesn't.
Review By [KzintiKiller] • Date [6 Nov 09] • Rating [7 out of 10]
ROTFLMAO..... that last cometment from Rose..... I love this oh so wonderful chapter and extremely glad to see this story updated again. Personaly I think that the Cullen's would be fine sparing with Faith if 1) they fed recently and 2) they were careful. As always I love this wonderful story and I eagerly await the next installment.
Review By [spring] • Date [2 Nov 09] • Rating [10 out of 10]
SlayerandWereLeopard
