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Review of chapter "Meals and Makeovers" from RowanChick
Found your story and I really really like it :) can't wait to see how you continue the storyline, I love your characterisation of Dawn and how she is strong and helpful but still staying true to herself, I hope you bring Connor and Cassie in they would be interesting to add to the mix maybe have them come in with Spike and Jordy (Oz's younger wolf cousin who bit him) as I think it would be very interesting to see how they react to the mallrats and Dawn. I wish you luck and hope you update soon :D
Review By [RowanChick] • Date [11 May 11] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Meals and Makeovers" from bellec
Great story! And original! By the way, because of your story I have started to re-watch the series, you are evil!! xD

Now, ideas... Okay, let me think...Ah!

How did the virus affect the no-normal humans(like werewolves, for example)?

Wolfram&Hart: There's an episode were they said that Wolfram had made experiments with virus. Did they have something to do with this one? It would be a good plan... Champions can fight demons, but they won't be able to fight a virus. And it's easier to take over when the defenders are kids...

Vampires, humans and the First Evil: In Season 7, the First mentions that once the vampires outnumbered the humans it would recover its physical form. Back to the fact that kids don't make great fighters, Dawn's going to have a big problem once she learns about that.

Following that line of thought, if she ever learns about the First, how does she learn?

PD: Don't give up on this story, it has a lot of potential, ;)


I nearly forgot about Spike! He promised Buffy that he would protect Dawn, so there's the possibility that he's around searching for Dawn. It would be interesting to see how Dawn explains Spike to the others,(maybe that's how they learn about vampires? I just can't see Spike going along with the virus excuse, he's too proud of being a vampire for that, xD)

And I agree with Orion. Our favourite anual event, is going to happen sooner or later. And while I think that the mall rats will get scared by the idea, they might get more scared when Dawn mentions that "apocalypse" should be used in plural and considered an anual event with a warm up that starts a few months before.

There're also some details that you can use, like Dawn not wanting to use the "W" word or her telling the kids about the true Santa Claus. And don't forget the Scooby-speak, xD

And now that I think about it... Is Dawn still going to get kidnapped every Tuesday?

By the way, a gift to feed the plot bunny:
Comments from author:
Ooooh, shiny picture :D

Thanks for the review, and the plot bunnies. I am going to include the First (now you've given me the idea). I'm going to have it appear to Dawn (and, in turn, the Mall Rats) as her mum, Buffy, the Scoobies etc. to try and trick her (and divide them, give them false hope that there are adults around so they won't want to fight, alone anyway). As for the lovely Spike, I don't know how he's going to get there (given that his dad took custody of her and NZ is a pretty long way to travel without encountering sunlight), but I will get him there even if I have to have him crossing the oceans on a bloody boat if I have to! And there'll be a whole Spike/Lex alpha-male rivalry thing going on.

I'm doing an Initiative type thing for the Mall Rats to learn about vampires (demons, and the forces of darkness). In my mind Lex and Ryan's 'Boot Camp' was more about preparing the more able kids to fight 'evil', and protect the others... Though they both think it was just a hoax to keep them scared and not fight the adults. So they won't take much persuading. I may make Tai San a former potential, if I can stomach giving her that much story time!

Ooh for the WRH idea, that will be 'incorporated' (read- shamelessly taken), but only when they get to the research-y place (where Zandra died and Amber... didn't), so Danny (ugh) would be aware of the whole supernatural element, given that her dad had something to do with the virus. Maybe Spike would know more about Angel's affairs than it seemed in the series.

In this, Dawn is a lot more savvy and strong than where we leave off with B:TVS, so there will be less kidnapping, more emotional weekness.

Wow, I now have a plot plan because of you! And I will update in the next week, for sure :D

Thank you for reviewing and getting my brain in gear for this story! Expect a cyber-cookie gift basket!
Review By [bellec] • Date [1 Mar 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Meals and Makeovers" from Orion
A decent start, and certainly a big bunch of bonus points for introducing The Tribe to TTH.

Ok, so, arc ideas? You want them, I got them . . . of course it's your story, so pick and choose as you want - these are just meant as inspiration.

~You've introduced vampires, demons, Armageddon (beyond simply: all adults died virtually overnight) and magic to TribeWorld. Roll with it. The mall rats will probably need to find out that it's real (and not just mutations from the virus) pretty quickly if they are going to help when Armageddon season roles around next Tuesday. Also, the locos tend to be pretty dark . . . bet a few of them are magic users of the not-good variety.

~On that note: Though vampires will probably become increasingly scarce (less humans to feed on, turn, and thus decreasing population on both fronts - the demons are probably mostly still around. It was never clear in Buffy if most of the demons actually NEED to eat people or not. Either way, more demons are likely still around then vampires - and they tend to be harder to kill if only for the "stake through the heart or even beheading do not always work" factor.

~Tai-San . . . probably already a magic user of the good variety.

~Having another older girl present will be good for Amber - someone to talk to - and maybe actually get in a health, trusting relationship with Brae - and thus she doesn't walk away and be believed dead after believing Ebony's exaggerations . . .

~There was always some question about if Zoot was actually dead - or if his ghost was around. Is he around haunting his ex? His brother?
Comments from author:
Thank you for the review- so many ideas! I big part of me wants to use all of your ideas and turn the Mall Rats into some kind of demon-fighting, spell-casting army :D
Review By [Orion] • Date [21 Aug 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Meals and Makeovers" from CPTSkip
I've never seen The Tribe but your story caught my interest. I hope you continue.
Review By [CPTSkip] • Date [20 Aug 09] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Meals and Makeovers" from Poisyn
YAY!!!!! finally another tribe fan =^_^= don't think it has gotten around much in the us which is a shame, i didn't even start watching till shortly after the guardian :/ the guys i like most don't come in till later then you've set XD though lex is in the top 5 ^_~
love to see if you add any one else from the btvs cast, but looks like you have a good start even if you don't =^_^=
Review By [Poisyn] • Date [20 Aug 09] • Not Rated
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