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Review of chapter "Chapter 58" from deathgeonous
Hmm, I'm kinda sad and disappointed that this has been left hanging for so long, I miss it cause it was good. And while I can totally understand real life coming along and wrecking your plans... it has been over two years since you've last updated. Oh well, thanks for writing what you did of this, and goodbye for now.
Review By [deathgeonous] • Date [19 Dec 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 9" from DragonBard
Having Willow so easily call up the Goddess like that just seems off to me.
Review By [DragonBard] • Date [18 Mar 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 58" from deathgeonous
Ah, I had just remembered this fic and decided that I had to reread it. It seems I missed a few chapters as well. Just a few, though that still makes me sad, for this is a great and fun fic, well, other then the last chapter, 58, it just had me going, huh? Major time skips and time compression seemed to be happening there. And I loved how, not only are you going deep into the Broms Broom theory here, what with the Numbers of the Beast element you've now put in and up, but you referenced yourself as a creator, which you would have to, what with the Brooms Broom theory thing you've got going on. Well, thanks for writing this, bye for now.
Review By [deathgeonous] • Date [1 Aug 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 56" from MadHobbit
very good story,only one small question , why did Willow at Halloween not dress up as a more famous Doctor? McCoy or Crusher? she would get medical skills years ahead and would fit with her Geek background.

in responce to your comments of my review question, I fully see your point,it could have gotten around the tech by having her char carry a medical engeneering databae with her or some such.
even Scotty knew how to make transparant aluminum. But then you have the problem of the chars being too powerful.

I was thinking about the story,and wonder if some char may come in and"spank" Willow and group for going downthe same path that caused her to come back in the first place.

1. she came back to stop all the secrets in the group, the thing with Giles I am fine with ,but she keep Buffy in the dark with Ben

Is having the Watchers kill Ben the same as doing it their selfs? in the real world we have conspirity to commit murder. While Glory was bad Ben was a helpless host ,think the gouald from stargate.

while having people join the Clan is fine,who watches them?as theyare getting more powerful soon almost NO one on either side can harm them "except the Creator or agents" power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutly.

I must say as a reader,I am so tired of the "shovel" speech.

I keep wanting to write a chapter where they give the "speech" to someone, that person calls the person they are dating, Tells them "Sorry,we have to break up , XXX says they will kill me." any relationship have "bumps" in the road, but to have a Death threat(which it is) hanging over your head.Goodbye free will.

and heaven or hell help anyone who by accident harms any of the clan.

like I say ,I like the story ,I would not be commenting on it as much if I did not.
Comments from author:
From an author's standpoint, I just didn't think about it. But now that you've brought it up, even if she had thought of it, she likely would have kept what she had. McCoy and Crusher both had advanced skills, but they were both used to using technology hundreds of years in advance of what was available at the time of that Halloween - and medicine is a very tech-driven discipline. Without tricorders, nanobots, etc, they simply wouldn't be as effective. So she dressed as a top-flight surgeon/diagnostician (think someone like House), and got the best skills for the time that she was at.

EDIT: *nods* Exactly the problem I'm working through on Green Pumpkins. There, it's an inescapable part of the work - here, it's a minor option.

EDIT2: She didn't keep Buffy in the dark with respect to Ben. She told Buffy when she first came back, and then Glory started manifesting, which affected everyone's memory. Before that happened, Willow had set up an automated system to tell when it would be the right time to take out Ben. By and large, Ben was innocent (his knowledge of Glory and what she would do means that he likely should have killed himself to safe hundreds or thousands of others, but that's beside the point); and this tore Willow up. She let Buffy know whenever she knew, herself.

The whole idea of the clan is that these are people who have put themselves into harm's way, and are like family to Buffy and Willow.The powers and the Goddess are both keeping an eye on them.

The shovel speech can be repeated too much, but it is the standard for saying, "We really care about this person. Hurt him/her intentionally, and you die." And the fact is, it's meant to scare you away if you aren't serious about the person, and it's meant to be carried out if you're an asshat. I think I have it twice in here, which, with all of the pairings, is pretty modest.

I'm very glad that you like it.
Review By [MadHobbit] • Date [11 May 12] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 47" from (Current Donor)Listener
I don't usually review mid-story, but I wanted to compliment you on how you handled the addition of Dawn. I thought it was clever and very natural the way she was just... there.
Comments from author:
Thanks. I couldn't imagine the monks doing anything substantially different, but I also couldn't see Willow not being prepared for this very important juncture.
Review By [(Current Donor)Listener] • Date [10 May 12] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 56" from draconis
Glad to see an update. Thank you.

Was a bit worried as it was creeping up on 6 months...quite an atypically long interval for this story.

I need to re-read. What punishment!!!...........................not!
Comments from author:
*grins* Yeah, I had been spending time in another fandom. If you want, you can see a large part of what I was spending time on... Oh, wait, you really should read that, because that has the other perspective for at least the next chapter or so.
Review By [draconis] • Date [7 May 12] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from Jazzibear
Re my previous review: I shall read about Daria and her adventures forthwith – thanks.

No, not Charlie Chan, but Nero Wolfe and Archie Goodwin, the creations of Rex Stout. Stout had a major falling-out with the FBI in the sixties, and the person ringing the doorbell was J Edgar Hoover. The Doorbell Rang did nothing to improve relations. Doorbell is an excellent novel.
Comments from author:
Never have heard of it. Was J. Edgar in a dress at the time?
Review By [Jazzibear] • Date [5 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 56" from Jazzibear
What a splendid story! I have to confess that I haven’t read it all yet, though I’m working hard at remedying the omission. What I’ve read I like very much.

How lovely to meet the characters form TNotB again – it’s long been one of my favourites, ever since Heinlein published it, in fact.

I wonder who the next visitors will be: it couldn’t be an overweight detective and his trusted and energetic assistant, could it? The book ended just as your chapter does, and it (the book) was similarly entitled. I expect it’s too much to wish for: it’s nearly 50 years since it was published, after all.

I look forward very much to the next chapter.
Comments from author:
No, strangely enough, you can find out what's on the other side of the door by reading, though only the last story bears directly on this one - the rest deal with how the characters got to be in that position.

And no, it's not Charlie Chan and his No. 1 son (assuming I got the reference right) - these are from a much later vintage.
Review By [Jazzibear] • Date [5 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 56" from borgrabbit
Errr? Holy fourth and a third wall, Batman!

Nice chapter!
Now, all you need is Gilgamesh Wulfenbach or Agatha Heterodyne to do some contract work for Willow.
Comments from author:
Would Daria Morgendorffer and Mike Harmon/Jenkins be enough?
Review By [borgrabbit] • Date [4 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 56" from TaraLi
Oooh, boy. (NO, that's *NOT* a hint to cross over Quantum Leap - PLEASE don't!)

Ok, this is going to get complicated fast! I can't wait to see the rabbits, hares, and other lagomorphs you're going to be pulling from your millinery!
Comments from author:
I don't know enough about QL to do a good cross of it. I'm actually crossing two alternate universes with two literature universes.
Review By [TaraLi] • Date [3 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 56" from GypsyDruid
I like the way you did that
Comments from author:
Read the last story in "The Author as a Lesbian" for the other half of the train wreck. I haven't gotten the last chapter before the two stories meet done, yet.
Review By [GypsyDruid] • Date [3 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 55" from deathgeonous
Ok, I wanted to reread this. So I looked for it. I spent about a day, not straight, on and off, I'm not stupid, just stubborn, looking for it in the T.V. section of the site, for that's where I thought it was. I could have sworn it was there, or used to be there. Well, after that, a day or really two latter, I went and did a search with 'Willow Turned Back Time' as the key words. And then I found it really fast. Well, anyways, other then not being able to find this, this was a great a fun read to reread, and read all that I had missed. Thanks for writing this, bye for now. Oh, yeah, and the whole 'Turned Back Time' aspect of this fic is not only more unique then the normal time travel idea, but it always makes me wanta break into song 'If I could turn back time.. If I could find a way...' Hehe.
Comments from author:
It did used to be there - as its major crossover was "Medium." But when it started crossing over with "The Number of the Beast," it went to Multiple Crossovers.
Review By [deathgeonous] • Date [14 Feb 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 54" from Zyanadryn
looking forward to more of this story! please kepp writing. plus my son said the number of the beast is good, so i guess i should read it so i know the characters you are bringing in :D 'happy writing!'
Review By [Zyanadryn] • Date [30 Nov 11] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 54" from DofEire
*mach 5 fangirl squee* One of my all-time favorite Heinlein books, 'Number of the Beast'. =) Hilda, Jake, Zeb and Deety FTW!!
Comments from author:
I will try to live up to your enthusiasm. :D
Review By [DofEire] • Date [28 Nov 11] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 3" from Ravus
I can't get past the first few chapters.

This seems like a good story with a thought out plot and interesting character progression on the horizon but I can't get to it. The writing it too scripted. If that was what you were going for then ignore this review. But otherwise I'd recommend eventually getting a Beta and coming back and redoing the initial chapters.

The Emotions and introspection for the characters are either off-base or none existent. Giles, Jenny and Angel are skipped over, they get a few seconds of dialogue and then just accept the alternate future and the need to change. No hesitation, no denial, no fear they just change. A little fleshing out of scenes like that would make the characters seem real and not just words on a page dancing to your amusement.

On the other hand the parts that are given attention seem forced. The big monologues that Willow gives to Buffy seem so out of place, no one interrupting or reacting except with simple actions "willow replied with tears in her eyes" that feel more like stage directions. Obviously you are trying to set up the romance between Willow and Buffy but it feels forced. Willow is too wordy and Buffy is too submissive, she internalises the revelation that she is bi instantly. As a teenager that makes it seem like Buffy either knew all along or that she has some mental problems. Teenagers do not accept. They Rebel.

I'm sure that you have improved lots, the premise you have is very good, the whole "scoobies will never lie to each other" could be so poignant if the delivery wasn't so rushed. But while the ideas are interesting the presentation ruins what could be an excellent story.

- Ravus
Comments from author:
Thanks for reviewing. The fact is, a good bit of it is scripted, as far as Willow's concerned. This is going to happen, that's going to happen. But she's come from the future with certain things that she wants to say, and certain things that she wants to have happen. She has practiced what she's going to say to Buffy during the month that she was doing everything else to get ready. She has decided what she wants to do, so yeah, she's going to make these big speeches. The others are listening because, guess what, they believe that she's from a future - she's proved it to them - and they know enough about her to trust her. Willow is very emotional about what she's done, and why she's done it, so she's going to "reply with tears in her eyes."

She doesn't go in with the idea of jumping Buffy's bones, but she's not going to lie about it. Buffy, for her part (and while not being overt about anything, even to herself, at this point), has loved Willow since they've met. But they're still just best friends at this point.

As for the rest of the Scoobies, they've listened because they respect Willow. Their stories will come up later. The point that you've read to is three days after she's come back. You might want to go a bit further. In any case, thank you once again for reviewing.
Review By [Ravus] • Date [28 Nov 11] • Rating [5 out of 10]
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