Lovely, absolutely lovely, although I think there are a few things you could do better:
primarily, you should have had Semual (WTF?) kill Angel ("BLASPHEMY! HERESY! You call *this* 'Angel'?!"), thus preventing the ritual from ever taking place. I also believe that he would be much less considerate about Buffy's feelings, not only in general (Dark Angels aren't known for being people-persons, you know...), but *especially* since Kendra arrived. Also, he should have taught Kendra of the Emperor, he may not be an Ecclesiarch Evangelist or the like, but to share the Emperor's Light with a fellow warrior? Why not?
I mean, it's not like you aren't going for an OOC marine already, otherwise the whole town would have been Purged by now.
And on another note, he should be rallying the USAF- er, I mean PDF. Shouldn't take too much effort, perhaps a Gate of Infinity into the Senate during the President's speech? Ought to catch their attention...

Absolutely Awesome ♥
Unique in every aspect ♥

very interesting idea and one I would like to see continued. well done

david

The unreal part is the one where a Dark Angel Librarian would abide the existence of the demonically empowered, vampire-loving Slayer, let alone the soul-cursed, demonic Vampire. Also, Terminator Armour? That's way past overkill, limited by the fact that it's designed more for power than speed and that the storm bolter has limited ammunition. Still, with a Thunder Hammer, it should have a Storm Shield (or am I working with obsolete editions?), and it shouldn't have any trouble what so ever with a lesser daemon.
Still, cool fic. Keep it coming.

Dud, just plain awesome!!! Cant' wait for the next chapter!

Great writing, thanks.

great story mate, will keep an eye on this.

keep up the great writing.

Thanks!

Would you believe it's my first try at fanfiction?

excellent work... it would be interesting if Spike is able to become a champion despite his curruption by Korne

what do you mean by champion, because he could be a Khorneite champion.

Thanks for the review!

I didn't think that Kendra would be killed at all with Semual in the frame. Pretty shocked by that happenstance.

I hope Xander does come back otherwise you will be writing more for an Original Character, than a Xander centred story.

With all these talks of the Walking Emperor and the last W40K story i Like reading is Xander as God Emperor, the only ones available would be:
Jonathan or Oz, unless another Original Character is introduced.

A twist can be introduced is that Xander is the Walking Emperor.

At some point, Xander's psyche goes to the future and "walks into" Semual's body, ready for a crusade to save humanity yet again.

I thought it was a good way to show that space marines are not perfect and that Spike is getting more powerful.

Xander DOES come back, well sorta, just gotta wait a bit.

I don't plan on having a character that is around be The Emperor, remember he was 'born' between 8 and 6 thousand B.C.E. Although, he could technically project any image he wanted into peoples minds. But I think I will have him be a OC when I do introduce him.

Thanks for the review!

Sort of disappointed in this chapter.. since Xander seems to have been regulated to a normal cross over character.. following canon cast around and doing almost nothing useful so regular plots can go on. He doesn't respect Buffy at all, finds her cowardice and love of a demon making her unworthy. She has no discipline or desire to really fight, Spike is running around with a book and cross of chaos.. and he sits around protecting what he considers a useless warrior from assassins. Doesn't even object to her wasting most her day in school while the forces of evil work?

I also couldn't believe he walked around without his armor on the hell mouth, a deadly dangerous area. I don't think he'd care about hiding that much, to a space marine their armor is like a second skin, you don't take it off and go walking around in chaos infested town to talk to people you don't respect or care about.

Over all Xander's new personalty has no reason to listen or Follow Giles or Buffy's request or commands.. yet he acts just like their little dog. I am also disappointed normal things like the bad guys always getting away continues to happen.

Sorry for the disappointment. I tried to show that Semual needs their help, for now. He has no knowledge of anything, he has no real support, and he has to take the timeline into account. He can't just go around blowing stuff up so he has to be subtle when he can. He also believes that The Emperor chose Buffy, even if he doesn't respect her he worships The Emperor so feels she was chosen for a reason. And I think a Librarian, who is the keeper of a Chapters histories and knowledge, would not shun her schooling.

Yes, the Hellmouth is deadly, but most of it happens at night.

I don't think I made him out to be a lapdog. He 'respects' Giles because of his personal quest for redemption mirrors his Chapters and his knowledge. And if I killed every bad guy when they showed up, there is no build up or growth to the badguys.

I thank you for the review and will try fix what I can.

wow... quite a few new things here...

Spike and Drusilla powered up by chaos?
Kendra dead?
Willow maybe a psyker?
Xander converting her to his faith?

Keep up the good work!

Not bad, although you slipped with the name of one of the Ruinous Powers...Its Tzeentch, not tzeetch....Tzeentch, Khorne, Nurgle and Slaanesh....although frankly i'm thinking that Angelus its the kind of depraved thing that would serve Slaanesh, if that meant turn Buffy into his toy and slave.....Luckily Slaanesh its still in gestation for several millennia more

Add, that the "Walking Emperor" must be moving towards Sunnyhell, as he more than likely he's worried for the intense Psyker and Warp bursts that his senses must have felt.......

Thanks for the review, I will go back and correct Tzeentch spelling. Yea Angelus does seem more of a Slaanesh follower to me too, oh well he wont be around long enough anyways HAHA.

The Walking Emperor...yes what is he up to? :)

Thanks for the review!

.... You know the issue I have with stories with WH40k is that people seem to believe chaos is all reaching at least the 40k gods anyway their warp spawn.. there is no warp at this point in time. They may exist but you run into all kinds of problems with them being away from the Eye of Terror and all that. Anyway was kinda hoping this story would be unique and that this wouldn't just turn into a basic frothing at the mouth for the emperor hump fest. There's more to 40k lore then that and the emperium wasn't always a chaos driving order machine that mostly happened after the Emperor got stuck in his throne. Ugh I don't know hopefully you can pull something original from this and not have it turn into a Xenophobe and Dameon hate fest. There are no Dameons from 40k without the warp so you can't just summon them up from no where and using the hellmouth as excuse doesn't really work either.

There is warp at this time actually, and Khorne, Nurgle, and Tzeetch are all around too. The Eye of Terror is just a massive warp-rift allowing daemons to enter the material plane. I also know that the Imperium was not always a tyrannical war machine, it was about uniting humanity and spreading The Imperial Truth. Unfortunatly, that IS what the Imperium is now, if/when I have Semual meet our young Emperor I want to show that he was not a war mongering tyrant. I will do my best to make this story unique.
Thanks for the review!

sucks that kendra died again, for once why couldn't it be buffy? besides that interesting story

It was good, I liked most of it however the interaction after Samuel breaks Ethan's neck is kind of....well forced would be the word, perhaps it could have been a little bit more meshed... Another thing wouldn't Samuel have been a little bit more questioning of the 'sliver' of chaos thats in Buffy? From the sounds of him he seems like a real zealot.

Also I highly doubt Samuel would tolerate the presence of demonic infested flesh in the form of angel no matter how 'good' he is....Will there be interaction between them? Will it involve warp fire and large swings of a large heavy hammer?

Interactions with the Scoobies will I think be rather stressed as the characters are radically different; for example the age difference, a 500 year old will most likely have little to say to a bunch of, at-least in his eyes children. Another thing, what interest might Samuel have for the Scoobies past getting the books on daemons; too him they are amateurs playing in the big leagues at-least compared to him.

A question I have is how you will characterize the Emperor or 'Shaman', as most of the characters that I have seen written lack any sort of depth and are simply, 'super bad-ass guy who can beat anything' I would hope to see an original imagining of the Emperor, you've got lots of lea-way regarding this character anyway so lets see something unusual. For example an Emperor that doesn't know how to fight yet... or is more of a man of science than war as he is described as being in canon, Samuel could in-fact be destined to teach the emperor about Chaos; remember we don't really 'know' anything about the emperor apart from him being really old and being the accumulative reincarnation of thousands of shamans. These Shamans possibly only knew a general idea of what 'Chaos' was plus we don't really know anything about the Shamans apart from them 'guiding' humanity whatever that means....

Point being have the emperor as being something unusual to make things interesting instead of the boring Mr.I AM A GOD AND KNOW BETTER THAN YOU.
(which is basically what the emperor thought, that he knew better then the rest of humanity, not that he didn't know better lol)

Also you gota remember in the Buffy verse there was originally no Emperor cuase if there had been Vamps and hellmouths would never have exsisted as he would have closed them all and hunted all the vamps down, so you have think up a reason why the emperor didn't do this....

Also problems with balance are a bigy now, with Samuel most of the episodes of Buffy would be nul and void due to overwhelming power; the judge? pah piece of cake.
Hence I think daemons from the 40k realm will have to appear. Also I think it would be cool to have corruption feature more, such as in the case of willow.... Also could icons of the emperor be more powerful than catholic crucifixes?

I also think Samuel would go abit mad knowing that chaos was infesting Holy Terra and nobody knew....any ideas as to how he would solve that one?

I hope that was constructive....lol would you believe this is the first time I've actually reviewed a story O_o.

I know I'm kinda stingy on the rating but I really do hope the next chappies are even better:).

No problem, I will go back see if I can make the sequence after Semual kills Ethan mesh more. That was the hardest part of the chapter for me to write and it still felt rushed. As for Buffy, since she does fight daemons he believes that it is The Emperors will, a kind of first test at making a super human. I wont say anymore since I have some plans for how it will be brought up and what it means.

Ah, Angel, his end will be funny for readers, I hope. They will probably only meet once, and threats will be given. The only reason he has not killed him already is because Willow interrupted in Chap 2 and Chap 3 he was not there. He also does not know that he has his 'humanity' back. Remember that Semual does not have his chapter for support, and the Dark Angel normaly keep to themselves. So he has to not antagonize the only people with information, for now.

His interactions with the scoobies will remain 100% professional, for him. I am thinking of having him see them as serf crew, there to help with administration and logistics. They will try and pry and change him. They do have home field advantage and knowledge of the time. He has to be somewhat subtle, whole time travel theory and all. A mistake could mean that The Lion never is created, I am pretty sure he would kill himself if he caused that, lol.

As for The Emperor, he wont be around for a while, and I have only started trying to write his backstory to better his introduction. When we do meet The Emperor it will explain what he did or didn't do about Hellmouths and demons.

Corruption and Chaos God influence will begin to crop up to even things out a bit. Also there are some demons in the Buffy cannon that would be a problem for Semual. The mayor and Glory for instance. As for magic users I have another idea for them. The Icons of The Emperor, I am not so sure. For now I am making them even in power, maybe I bit more so.

And Semual was a bit overwhelmed with the knowledge he was on Ancient Holy Terra. His mission will be defined quite clearly in Chap 4.

The review was great! Any ideas and observations help me, this is my first time writing! :)