Large PrintHandheldAudioRating
using
 paypal
Twisting The Hellmouth Crossing Over Awards - Results
Is your email address still valid?

Xander Harris Time Cop

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking
Review of chapter "Chapter Seven: Phone call I don't want to make" from Razial
Review:
This is pretty good so far, I like Time Cop as it was a good film and this crossover is not one I've seen before. please continue it. (razial)
Review By [Razial] • Date [6 Oct 11] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Six: Friends will do" from missinglink
Review:
So far has been slow to build, but understand the why what with how you are trying to create most of it outside of known just using familiar characters. This was probably the best chapter to date as you really catch the edge of what that dread is when all you can do is confirm you worst fear. Would have liked a little more descriptive to the reaction. Maybe a tunneling of his vision, a draining of the colors around him, sounds becoming echos and far away. More of a step off the cliff into oblivion, but then maybe they were a little further distant than we were led to believe.

As honor bound and duty bound as Xander is, the onus for him actually attempting to either save Buffy & Willow or even further back and Faith & Giles needs to haunt him and hound at him. Here he is loosing his last two ties to a life he spends part time with and that has to unhinge him. It has to cause him to question himself and his judgement. He has lost his anchors in life to caring. The others around him may be friends in some capacity, but these were not just friends, these were familiy with bonds forged in battle. That has to be the focus of him considering it while his own nature fights the idea of bringing them back. The arguements need to be Buffy's resurrection (poor execution) vs his saving her in the cave (good overall). In each case though a price was paid in the effect on Buffy's mental well being afterwards. Granted here death would never have been touched, simply avoided, but would there still be consequences if it was their time to go? If he is willing to go that far, how far back is enough? Where does he draw the line in the sand, of this and no further? What also might play well is the possible mystery of just what happened to cause the explosion.

Ultimately Xander must struggle with this decision and have that inner conflict as he is going to be doing something that would be against his nature on one hand, but not on another. He would do anything to save his friends, but to risk time just to save them when his life is to preserving time should make it a costly choice and one that he feels regret or grief for having to make.

Keep it up and hope the muse is more cooperative as the moments become crucial to the story. Later.
Comments from author:
Woah, thank you for taking the time to write this lengthy review.

Your argumentation is basically sound, yet for Xander it all goes back farther than just Buffy's death. I am not talking about Jessie here, as that was never again touched upon in the series. For him it began with the zoo keeper's desire in becoming one with the animal spirits, and his own attempted rape of Buffy.

For me the real question was; Had it all been orchestrated from the beginning, by someone who had a real, if unjustified grudge to settle? Someone who realised that he could never settle that grudge directly, someone who reveled in chaos. I have the whole story figured out, why Xander was made a target, by whom and how. I just need to turn all of this into a cohesive whole.

Though, there is some input I need; do you think Max would tell Xander about his own meddling in history, or is Xander the type of character who would willingly risk utter chaos? Well, we still have the PtB to make sure that certain things go as these things always go, badly.

Thanks again for your feedback.
Review By [missinglink] • Date [19 Apr 10] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Five: Pictures" from nemogbr
Review:
If I remember it correctly, they are not supposed to change the timeline or at least ensure that the TEC still exists, else the Timecop would be stuck back in the past.

Van Damme's character managed to save his wife and child, should be interesting to see how you save Faith and Giles.

I would have thought that the TEC would also need to know about the Demons or they end up very vulnerable.
Review By [nemogbr] • Date [31 Mar 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Five: Pictures" from eriktheviking
Review:
Great update, thanks.
Review By [eriktheviking] • Date [31 Mar 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Four: Rain" from DarkFaerieYumi
Review:
OMG! Faith and Giles died?! OMG! *bawls* NO! How?! That sucks but this fic is SO cool! I wanna know more I can't wait for next week!
Review By [DarkFaerieYumi] • Date [23 Mar 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Four: Rain" from Neverwillmini
Review:
Well jeez, now I want to know what happened, how they died, and why they thought the others hated them!
Review By [Neverwillmini] • Date [22 Mar 10] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Four: Rain" from eriktheviking
Review:
Great update with a nicely written scene at the graveside.
Review By [eriktheviking] • Date [22 Mar 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three: Diner's diner" from AllenPitt
Review:
just imagine some rogue time cop deliberately or accidentally changing one of the pivotal Sunnydale moments...and suddenly there's a huge mayor-snake ruling California, or Adam is leading a cylon-type cyborg army...etc.
Review By [AllenPitt] • Date [22 Mar 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three: Diner's diner" from eriktheviking
Review:
A well written getting to know you scene.
Review By [eriktheviking] • Date [22 Mar 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three: Diner's diner" from VillageOrchid
Review:
So far your dialog and characterization skills with dialog are your strength, but you rush the exposition so I often feel like I'm getting highlights or a montage of a a scene rather than a full scene.
Comments from author:
Thanks and I promise it will get better along the way, there is a learning curve involved in writing after all.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [22 Mar 10] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Two: the elepant's dentist" from eriktheviking
Review:
Great update, thanks.
Comments from author:
You're welcome.
Review By [eriktheviking] • Date [22 Mar 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One: Twinkies and Tribulations" from eriktheviking
Review:
A well written and intriguing crossover.
Comments from author:
Thank you, I will try to update regularly.
Review By [eriktheviking] • Date [21 Mar 10] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue: Twinkies and rookies" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Well, I like the idea that Xander the so called "normal one" may be the only time cop that knows about slayers, the supernatural and deamon languages. Could be interesting, the types of problems that he can "see" and interact with. Because with the secret history of the supernatural there's very little knowledge of the original time line and who can trust or want to keep accurate those pesky watcher diaries anyway?

That said - either make "Sarah" another fiction character that you're bringing in (and let us know from where) or define her in some OC way.
Comments from author:
Thank you.
Sarah's role will be made clear, I assure you.

I can just imagine a watcher diary suddenly changing while Giles is reading it... *grin*
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [21 Mar 10] • Not Rated
StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking