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Review of chapter "Factors" from bradsan
almost a year now. I really want to read more.
Comments from author:
You are the first person to review in almost a year. I honestly thought nobody was reading it anymore. Glad to know that someone is. Bug me for awhile, and I'll try and get a new chapter out. I'm not going to promise anything though, because it has been such a long time since I've written for this story. I have to remember what my plans were. Any plot suggestions are welcome. My biggest inspiration comes from my reviewers.
Review By [bradsan] • Date [6 Feb 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Factors" from serenityselena
interesting chapter...
hope to read more soon ^_^
Review By [serenityselena] • Date [31 Aug 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Factors" from Erica
U r my new hero. U have managed ti combine my 2 favorite stories AND have my favorite characters from each in the limelight. I don't know what good deed I did to deserve this but thanks so much!!
Review By [Erica] • Date [2 Apr 12] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Woken" from serenityselena
I`m glad they discovered what happened with Faith and that she will soon be ok....
poor Gibbs.... he sure feels awful but at least he realized that he`s been drugged....
Abby`s reaction was great...
can`t wait to read more ^_^
Review By [serenityselena] • Date [19 Mar 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Woken" from Iceflame
Nice. Eli David has seriously, SERIOUSLY screwed up >:). MOSSAD is going to need a seriously large recruitment drive to replenish the Goon Department very soon!
Review By [Iceflame] • Date [19 Mar 12] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Broken Rules" from Rich
Not bad. I agree you've "dumbed down" the good guys, but the effect of drugs, and possibly magic (?) can explain that. Gibbs WILL realize he's been drugged - he seems to be about halfway there already. When he does he'll realize that there's a lot more going on here than he thought, and he'll be even madder than he is now. Eli is in more trouble than he realizes (I never liked him very much anyway).

CaptainBoulanger has a point about the spelling. It doesn't ruin the story but it is a little distracting. Unfortunately, spellcheck programs don't understand context; they don't get that "studying for finales" doesn't make sense while "studying for finals" does. This isn't a personal criticism - I'm just as guilty as anyone else (while typing this, I've had to correct at least 3 mistakes).

I'm a fan of both BTVS and NCIS, so I like this story so far. I look forward to seeing more of it.
Review By [Rich] • Date [11 Mar 12] • Rating [6 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Fighting" from (Recent Donor)CaptainBoulanger
You need to go through and check your spelling. You've got several misspelled words, mostly ones spellcheck won't catch because they are real words, just the wrong ones (but similar) for the sentence - waist instead of waste, quiet instead of quite, that sort of thing.
Review By [(Recent Donor)CaptainBoulanger] • Date [11 Mar 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Broken Rules" from serenityselena
uh oh... things are not too good though I really hope they will get Eli David soon... he is such a bastard...
can`t wait to read more ^_^
Review By [serenityselena] • Date [11 Mar 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Broken Rules" from evilredknight
I thought this story started off really strong. Unfortunately you've kind of lost me.
I find Gibbs really off.
Gibbs is a man with his own secrets, who clearly accepts and acknowledges that other people are entitled to theirs.
If it does not directly effect SOLVING the case he's on, he does not need to know.

Ziva is rescued, case closed. Canon Gibbs would leave it there. He's been told he has no need or right to know. He would NOT feel the right to know those secrets Buffy, Faith, and Willow don't want to share. A private man gives others their privacy - when it's not directly related to solving the case.

Now, a case could be made here that Gibbs is drugged/altered with something that won't let him let it go. But and it's a big but - Gibbs does have team-mates - especially Tony, who would be going "What the hell's wrong with you boss? You're not acting right." NOT secretly following an out of character Gibbs down a rabbit hole for no real reason(case wise). Gibbs IS off - his very smart and observant team would see that.
If Abby's NOT giving Gibbs a freakin' blood test for mind altering substances in the next chapter, I'll have to call Bull(beep).
Comments from author:
First off I want to say thank you for your honest and insightful review.

The only reason Tony, and McGee are following Gibbs is because it's about Ziva. When it comes to the people Gibbs cares about all bets are off. Both men were there when Gibbs was obsessing about Ziva's brother. Was that just a case? No. It was the involvemnet of Kate, that made him that way. Same goes here. However it's not going to stay that way. It was the drug that made him obsess. He was hurt that Ziva didn't tell him about Faith, and was trying to figure the mystery of them. That's what he was thinking about when he drank the drug.

If he hadn't of been drugged then he would have kept to the origanial plan. To simply observe, and quietly look into their background. To at least ease his curiosity.

There will be no need for a drug test. Gibbs is not a stupid man. He's going to realized that he was drugged once he wakes up, and then he's going to make amends.
Review By [evilredknight] • Date [11 Mar 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Revelations" from spk
Such an intriguing story. Can't wait to see what happens when both teams figure out what Eli David has done. :)
Review By [spk] • Date [11 Jun 11] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Revelations" from Kremer
Since when do slayers get such massive infections so quickly from a single gunshot wound (or even just an infection in the first place)? That should have raised some immediate alarm bells for both Willow and Buffy to get Faith immediate treatment. Yet they not only remain submissive, but even allow Faith to be handcuffed!

Willow should have immediately 'ported them to the nearest Council-friendly medical facility, then just as quickly get in contact with their upper U.S. gov't contacts to have this entire NCIS encounter classified and non-disclosured for all involved. (Your having Sam quickly show up with a Presidential letter shows they've got major clout.)

I tend to agree you're "dumbing down" the good guys just for the sake of plot.

Edit -- Thanks for the reply. I really do think the story premise is great and is otherwise going along fine!
Comments from author:
Again I like your honesty. I promise the "Dumbing Down" is just for that chapter. I needed to put a few pieces into place and get them back to the school before I show you how they really work. Hopefully you'll like the next chapter better.
Review By [Kremer] • Date [8 Jun 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Revelations" from xman
Okay are you trying to get a director killed because I know that Faith well kill him if she finds out she has killed before and to protect what she loves she well go as far as she can to keep what is hers.
Review By [xman] • Date [8 Jun 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Revelations" from Lulubell
WoW I want to killl Eli too... Cant wait for more
Comments from author:
thanks for the review
Review By [Lulubell] • Date [8 Jun 11] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Revelations" from burmafrdnow
Very unrealistic frankly as regards Buffy and Willow. Buffy would have been on the phone right away making it very clear to the Government of Israel why they need a new director of the Mossad. Time to apply the muscle, which Buffy would have done. She would also have immediately started surveillance and investigation into anyone anywhere near the Mossad director. Sadly you are falling into the trap of hollywood writers by dumbing down the good guys and making the bad guys seem so much smarter. Sad because this story had potential that is being squandered.
Comments from author:
I like your honesty. I'm sorry you feel that way, but I can promise you that when they get back to school Buffy and Sam are going to jump into action.They were just more worried about getting Faith help.
Review By [burmafrdnow] • Date [8 Jun 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Revelations" from serenityselena
thank God they got out...
Director David is a bastard... hope the gang find out what he did to all of them...
can`t wait for more ^_^
Comments from author:
thanks for the review.
Review By [serenityselena] • Date [8 Jun 11] • Not Rated
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