Large PrintHandheldAudioRating
Twisting The Hellmouth Crossing Over Awards - Results
Rules for Challenges

Undone: Justice League Slayer Style

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking
Review of chapter "Secret Origins: Prologue" from SpacedCadet
Great beginning.

Where's the story ?
Review By [SpacedCadet] • Date [1 Aug 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Secret Origins: Prologue" from fran
I Like, I Lust, I Love!!Please Update Soon!!
Review By [fran] • Date [11 Jun 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Secret Origins: Prologue" from justapiranha
I would like to see how this story turns out, but this is the 3rd prologue in 4 chapters and less then 2,200 words.Total.
--This is not a flame--.
I am just pointing out that it has very little story to it yet. In 4 updates you have posted a summery each time that is 103 words long, and only 3-4 short paragraphs of story per posting. It seems like you are trying to put lots of filler in your postings. It seems like a lot of people like your idea, 20 some good reviews. I'm just waiting for you to stop cluttering up your fic with redundant filler and get to the real story.
Review By [justapiranha] • Date [6 Apr 11] • Rating [1 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Secret Origins: Prologue" from VillageOrchid
Is it Joan because of the visions, like Joan of Aracadia?

Meanwhile you wrote: the aching headache that was starting to plaque her.

She should brush and floss if plaque is giving her a headache.

You may want the letter "g" instead of "q".
Comments from author:
whoops thanks! I didn't realize what I did! Thank you!
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [3 Apr 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue 2" from VillageOrchid
So no hair dye for Buffy in this world. So far so good. The transitive of "to die" is dying.
Thanks for sharing the tale.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [3 Apr 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Secret Origins: Prologue" from evilredknight
Well I guess I'll add my 2 cents too.

Why does Buffy need to be paired with anyone? A romance JUST to have a romance is lame. Is it integral to the story? Does it make sense? Clearly not it you deciding by poll.

Think about it.
Would a 20 year old college drop out who's major interest outside of slaying is shoe shopping, attract the romantic interest of a worldly sophisticated Bruce Wayne? Not to knock Buffy, but no. What the heck would they REALLY talk to each other about? Discussing how and where they've saved the world would run out fast. BOTH characters would have to be so incredibly OOC it would be silly.

One of my pet peeves are some of the absolutely ridiculous pairings you see on this site. Basing a pairing on how hot the sex you picture between the two actors that play them would be(NOT the characters), makes the whole thing pretty shallow. Main one - 22 year old Buffy/50 year old Jack O'Neill? Give me a break.
(And don't start whining that Angel and Spike were OLD. Buffy was NOT into them for their age. She was into them for their HOT 20 something bodies. I still consider them both little more then child molesters.)
For a pairing to work it HAS to make sense. Could a Buffy/Wayne combo work? Sure.
An end of season 8 Buffy POSSIBLY would. She's been shot, lead and faced armies, robbed banks, lived in a castle, learned Italian, slept with a woman, traveled around the world. Heck, they'd be able to talk about the kind of foods they each ate when in Tibet.
The life experiences she had in THOSE three years make her an entirely different WOMEN(not girl) then the season 5 Buffy.

See what I mean?

Buffy here, for all her experience in saving the world is a young, fairly naive, undereducated, girl, with no real adult life experiences outside Sunnydale. Bruce Wayne would NOT pair up with this Buffy. As sexually attractive as he may see her. He would treat her as a little sister. For all his playboy persona, he is not the selfish, perving, jack-offs Angel and Spike are. NONE of the senior members of the JLA would EVER consider a relationship with her at this age. They would consider it cradle robbing.

If you NEED to pair her up. Then I have 1 suggestion for you. A late Robin/early Nightwing, Dick Greyson. Close ages, similar tastes in music, movies, food. Comparable levels of power, skills, education, and experience.

I think you might just reconsider what you're doing with Buffy romantically here. Make it more realistic.
I think your story would be better for it.
Review By [evilredknight] • Date [3 Apr 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue 2" from TwoBlackDragons
To be different for pairings I vote Buffy/Zatana/Wonder Woman.
Review By [TwoBlackDragons] • Date [31 Mar 11] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue 2" from DigitalSorceress
Okay, people are putting their pairings in in reviews, so I guess I will too.

I honestly think it would be a little neat to have Blue Beetle (Ted Kord) as a romantic interest. Batman and Buffy is done a lot, as is Superman and Buffy. It would just be refreshing to have another character besides one of the Big Ones, and maybe not another...Brooder. It's your story no matter what, and I'll keep reading as well no matter what guy she gets paired with.

I really like your story so far anyhow, and can't wait for another update. So few good DC crossovers these days, and far, far fewer that don't jump on the Xander focused bandwagon for Buffy/DC crossovers.
Review By [DigitalSorceress] • Date [23 Mar 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Biography" from IceLady
I usually don't read stories that don't include ships, that's one of my deal breakers in fanfic. But the story idea was intriguing enough that I going to take a chance. Plus, there's just not enough Buffy/DC fics around.

That said, I'm looking forward to your next chapter, now that Buffy is actually awake. If your taking votes for pairings then my first choice would be Batman. Not only would Buffy's Joan persona fit in, and complement his Bruce Wayne cover perfectly, but just imagining them fighting crime, and the occasional alien together give me the chills. 2nd choice would be a threesome between Bruce/Buffy/Clark (the cover art for this story gave me ideas). Third choice would be Oliver Queen. I kinda came to love him on Smallville
Review By [IceLady] • Date [23 Mar 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue 2" from CrystalBlaze
That description at the end implied either a manifestation of her willpower ala the GL Corps or, more likely, the power of the Key is now part and parcel of Buffy so Dawn can have a shot at a life of her own..
Review By [CrystalBlaze] • Date [22 Mar 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue 2" from cloudleonsgurl
Love it. The more you write the more I want to read. I can see great potiental for this story and can't wait to see where you take this.

PS. I'll try to make a new banner for you today or tomorrow. And I forgot to vote. Bats, Green Arrow or Superman. Don't really care, but they are my favorites.

Also, if you are sort of following the JL cartoon look up Justice League Quotes, and find wikiquotes for them. It'll let you read what happens in every episode and also you can use certain quotes to help keep people in character if you have trouble with that. :)
Review By [cloudleonsgurl] • Date [21 Mar 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue 2" from LostDragon
Great start but the chapters could be a little longer, reading them makes me feel like I am being teased.
Review By [LostDragon] • Date [21 Mar 11] • Rating [6 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue 2" from (Current Donor)Tempi
A promising beginning. I look forward to reading more.

BTW my vote for pairing would be Batman, Wonder Woman or Jason Blood in that order.
Comments from author:
Thank you for the votes, I will be adding them with the others.
Review By [(Current Donor)Tempi] • Date [21 Mar 11] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue 2" from deathgeonous
Hmm, nice fic, but the chapters are a little short, although the pictures are nice. Well, thanks for writing this, bye for now.
Review By [deathgeonous] • Date [21 Mar 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Biography" from TwoBlackDragons
Why did you change Buffy's first name but not her last name?

,\./. ///./

You do know that Buffy's real name is Buffy don't you? The Elizabeth is fanon not canon.

Joan Maria Summers
Real Name:
Elizabeth “Buffy” Anne Summers
Comments from author:
Not sure why I did, just had a sudden feeling to do it. Not changing her last name was also part of that feeling. At first I was going to change her name to Winters but I let her have her last name instead.
Review By [TwoBlackDragons] • Date [21 Mar 11] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Page: 1 of 2 next end
StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking