Review of chapter "Prologue" from julz
It sounds very intresting. I enjoy your writing style. Please continue
Review By [julz
] • Date [2 Dec 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue" from garrycooper
Good, good, good!!!!!!!!!!!!
Review By [garrycooper
] • Date [25 Jan 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue" from mariegilbert
I'm eager to see where this goes, I've read stories where dawn is attacked, but never a story with bad shots!
Review By [mariegilbert
] • Date [29 Aug 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue" from AllenPitt
Instead of immediately running into Anita B or whoever, how about some 'ordinary' psychic sees her, and wonders why there's a green glowing aura around her. Who was that witch who worked for the RPIT squad ?
Next up, it'd be fun if Dawn was one of the rare types of weres.... though 'wolf' is the most likely, probably
So... she's intruding on some pack's territory without permission, first weres that spot her will report her; she likely doesn't know about that 'rule'.
Meanwhile Buffy probably didn't realize the effect the term 'monster' would have on her, ouch. I can imagine a very upset slayer following her in, also without permission from the Master of the City. Willow provides a tracking spell, maybe?
Review By [AllenPitt
] • Date [4 Aug 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue" from yakuit
great start and good concept hope to hear more soon
Review By [yakuit
] • Date [21 Jul 11] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue" from Gideon
Cool idea, sad that Buffy still thinks in terms of monsters in some part of her mind. I hope Dawn finds her pard after Anita had taken over. Before would not be good.
Review By [Gideon
] • Date [4 Jul 11] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue" from Pluto
Good start! I like how she and Buffy are on the rocks.
Why isn't Buffy speaking to Giles?
Review By [Pluto
] • Date [2 Jul 11] • Rating [6 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue" from Xeelia
Nice start! I hope Dawn doesn't end up chaining herself up!!
Review By [Xeelia
] • Date [2 Jul 11] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Prologue" from LeaFairy
Great beginning! I love the idea of Dawn becoming a Lycanthrope by having been forced into taking the vaccine (by Buffy at that...), instead of being attacked and thus getting infected that way... It's pretty damn original I think. Also it gives her something in-common with Richard.
I am curious as to what kinda were she is? I'm guessing wolf, but hopefully whatever she is, she isn't a leopard. It really has been done before, and with her being a leopard she's stuck under Anita's rule, which isn't ever great. IMO at least =) Also if she's a wolf, maybe her and Richard can bond or something? I always had a soft spot for him and always thought that if he had someone strong, with a better view on life and who/what the "monsters" really are (like maybe, Dawn? lol.) that they could help him out of his self-hating spiral and help him become a better Ulfric to his pack.
As for ideas, I really don't have any... The only thing I can think of that's somewhat original is Dawn not meeting any of the big players in St. Louis for awhile. Usually in a story the BtVS character meets the big characters in the AB-verse (Anita, Jean-Claude, etc...) within the first few chapters, so maybe you could have Dawn settle down for awhile and stay low/hidden? Or maybe you could have her meet one of the lesser/under-used characters of the AB-verse? Like maybe Narcissus? *shrugs* I can't really think of anything right now, sorry.
Anywayyyy, this really was a great and interesting start and I definitely look forward to reading more in the future! Thanks for writing!!
Review By [LeaFairy
] • Date [2 Jul 11] • Not Rated