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Xander's Character

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Review of chapter "I hope you choke on me" from eriktheviking
Review:
A great set of characterizations.
Comments from author:
Thanks, it was a bit out of my comfort zone, but I think I nailed everybody pretty well.
Review By [eriktheviking] • Date [15 Sep 11] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "I hope you choke on me" from RockyWilliams
Review:
Not a bad story, could use a bit of polish, and something to signify the change to after the battle would help too. Suddenly reading about Dawn was jaring for just a moment. Also, nee isn't properly used here. Nee is born as. So, a Buffy who married Xander would be Buffy Harris nee Summers. Unless this is alternate reality, and Buffy's name was Harris, and Xander was a Summers.
Comments from author:
I added a scene breaker, I'd had one before but sometimes things disappear between me, and my Beta, and the emails. I also switched it around. A few people had mention it, so I did change it. I'm trying to improve, but I've found polish is a bit hard to get without a lot of time, and I do think the more I post the smoother my stories get. This one was the first one a year or so I think. Feel free to check out some of my other stories and say what you think.
Review By [RockyWilliams] • Date [13 Sep 11] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "I hope you choke on me" from Gideon
Review:
I could see that going down just as you wrote it. There would only be one thing more likelt to bring Buffy out of retirement and that would be a threat to Dawn.
One thing though, I think Buffy's name should be written as Buffy Harris, nee Summers not the other way around
Comments from author:
Yeah, thanks for the review. As for the nee thing, I thought about that as well. But the truth is, one spouse couldn't fight vampires and leave the other out of it. Xander chose to stay when Buffy left, and in turn she had to leave him.
Review By [Gideon] • Date [13 Sep 11] • Rating [7 out of 10]
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