Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Obsidian
Great Story so far. Hope you continue it.
Review By [Obsidian
] • Date [22 Jul 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Bigfan
Awesome story. Excellent writing and I love how you've blended Xander with the Fanastic Four and the Avengers. I also want to tell you that I've enjoyed your version of Fury. He's still a huge dick, but he's not as bad as some people write him out to be. I'm def hooked on this story, and I hope you will update soon. Great job!
Review By [Bigfan
] • Date [17 May 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from deusexsububi
I took some time to reread this. Your public demands an update!
Review By [deusexsububi
] • Date [9 Apr 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Ironbear
Hrmm. What happened to Fury's promise to get Cordelia out for a few public dates for Xander in order to help her with her financial issues? Fury just forgot? And Xander hasn't called Fury on it yet?
Seems a bit OoC for Xander.
ETA: *nod* So, the "I kind of forgot about it" part is the operative phrase here, huh? ;)
ETA2: Ah well. I was tracking this mostly out of interest and curiosity toward seeing how you were going to handle that interaction. I enjoyed your X/C interactions in "Spyke". Now that I'm aware that you won't be following up on it, I'll untrack it.
I disagree with the reasoning that Xander would have let it go after making a point of making it a condition for going along with Fury in the first place. At the very least, a confrontation with Fury over why Nick hadn't followed through on his word, followed by vehement argument between the two of them over the security thing, would have made it believable... possibly. (Depending on how it was written and handled.)
Given that Fury has Xander going on talk shows and doing interviews, as well as allowing him to visit Sunnydale and have contact with his friends there, makes the security concerns argument a bit weak.
The argument that Xander wouldn't follow through on an intent to try to make up for the damage he did to Cordy, and to assist her out of her post-Sunnydale difficulties, out of fear of his ex-girlfriend quite honestly makes him sound like a spineless jerk, which is heavily OoC. And considering that in canon prior to the point where this fic began, they had reconciled after the prom dress and even skipped class together during the lead in to the Ascension, makes the argument nonsensical.
Coupled with the ongoing blackmail by Fury, all of this is adding up to far too many plot holes and inconsistencies in internal story logic for me to continue maintaining my suspension of disbelief.
A pity. I've enjoyed a lot of the installments in your "Xander as various X-men" series. I was hoping to enjoy this story as well.
ETA3: Hrmm... this is getting to be a bit lengthy to do as a comments section exchange. If you want, pick it back up in a PM, and we can follow up on it at both of our leisure? Or not. As you choose.
Comments from author:
In all honesty, Fury/I kind of forgot about it/realised what a security breach it would be, so he pretty much dropped it and Xander never called him out on it on account of having a healthy respect/fear of Cordelia and because he did not want to pretend to be in a relationship with someone whose heart he already broke and who has access to an arsenal of bladed weapons.
Edit: That, combined with a whole 'I couldn't figure out a way to make it work with Fury's whole 'secret identity' thing' situation... Yeah.
Edit 2: Well I guess that's just where you and I disagree on what makes Xander 'in character'.
Don't get me wrong, I've heavily enjoyed most, if not all, of your stories, but I consider your version of Xander to be, well, a lot more confident and outspoken than he ever was in canon. He is also a lot more aware, almost clinically in some cases, of the faults and better qualities of all those around him. While I do agree that he is pretty good at reading people, I definitely don't think he could list these all off so eloquently on the spur of the moment.
And Xander didn't make dating Cordelia a condition of his going along with Fury's plan. He tried to make S.H.I.E.L.D. pay for her college, even though, well, he didn't really have the grounds to do so (her father was cheating his taxes and the U.S. government did take the money legally... her financial situation, whilst tragic, wasn't S.H.I.E.L.D.'s responsibility) and Fury twisted it into something else entirely that Xander was not on board with.
The 'fear' thing wasn't really a good explanation, I'll give you that, but it wasn't really meant to be. Fury never brought it up again and Xander didn't really want it brought up again, so the whole thing was dropped in favour of more pressing issues and, later, the more opportune and beneficial 'relationship' with Jean.
The security concerns, I'll admit, are a bit of a copout for me to keep Xander away from Sunnydale for as long as I have. They pretty much always have been, to be honest. But when he goes on talk shows, he does so in costume and in persona. How he appears and acts as 'Surge' is pretty different (i.e. a certain degree more professional and confident in himself, heck, he's downright cocky at times) to how Xander ever acted before his empowerment. Plus, as far as anyone in Sunnydale's concerned, Xander's working in L.A..
I suppose you could say he's Clark Kenting, in a sense, with people simply not being able to fit the 'Xander' and 'Surge' identities together because, well, they simply can't believe the two would ever be one.
As for allowing him to visit Sunnydale, that's pretty simple. As time goes on, Fury's threats get less and less threatening. 'Surge' has ingratiated himself with both the public and the Ultimates enough that Fury simply can't 'out him' as a bad guy and expect no one to question it. So now he has barter to keep Xander under control. Hence why he's starting to concede things like giving Xander time off. The thing is, though, that Xander's only just starting to realise this.
Although, out of curiosity, what other plot holes/inconsistencies have you noticed? Or was it just the Xander/Cordelia stuff? Because I have to say that while I love the pairing, I just didn't set out to write a Xander/Cordy fic here.
Review By [Ironbear
] • Date [9 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from EroSlackerMicha
so how many x-men tag along? (lol)
more please. starting to feel withdrawl
Review By [EroSlackerMicha
] • Date [8 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Sanabalis
Awesome story! Looking forward to more! Only complaint: chapters coming out too slow! :P :)
P.S. Get Xander a girl or five!
Comments from author:
You know, a lot of people have been making similar comments, but I'm sorry to say that, well, I don't really see him being with anyone at this point. He's too focused on the whole double life/secret identity thing, not to mention the press, various meta-criminals and getting out from under Fury's thumb.
Review By [Sanabalis
] • Date [7 Apr 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from lastjuan
I'm really impressed with this story. In general I have several reserves about Superheroes and Sunnydale in the same universe, but you get to work around these issues. The only thing that leaves me a bit upset it's that you haven't hooked Xander yet ;-).
Thanks for sharing with us!
Review By [lastjuan
] • Date [24 Mar 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Eljin
this is great, i really like it. the story flows well, its not boring, and the time skips are long enuf to skip parts where nothing much has happened but not long enuf for a lot to have been missed out.
it would be nice to see if xander is receiving any further education or training. especially with the mentorship thing he has going with fury.
it would also be nice if xander and jean actually end up in a real relationship. genuine love and affection growing from the time theyve spent together. theres plenty of potential for angst and shenanigans as each realises that they truly care for the other while in a fake relationship.
Review By [Eljin
] • Date [23 Mar 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Piterio
I love this story and hope you continue it. Every moment of it is something I enjoyed reading. Though I bothered by all the pears and lies moment it just how life is.
Review By [Piterio
] • Date [3 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from nerfherder
Still waiting for this years update. This is to good a story to let fall by the wayside.
Comments from author:
Well it is still early in the year... nah, I should have something up by the end of the month. Sorry, but I do have other projects going on at the moment.
Review By [nerfherder
] • Date [7 Feb 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Morgomir
Great chapter. Keep up the good work.
Review By [Morgomir
] • Date [2 Jan 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Chikageko
WEEEEEEE! You're back here. Good. This is all going to blow up in xanders face isnt it? Rofl, I can't wait to see willows reaction when she finds out Xander is dating a redheaded not-her.
Edit 1: Unless she's past Oz and onto her repressed bisexual 'i'm a lesbian' psychosis, i was under the impression during the seasons 4 through seven that she'd still have happily gone out with Xander if he's ever figured it out enough to ask her out under his own power.
Comments from author:
Well, 'blow up' is a little too harsh for what I have in mind. And by this point Willow's long past her Xander obsession.
Review By [Chikageko
] • Date [8 Nov 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from wonderbee
Interesting, and will look forward to what happens when Jean arrives, as well as what else might go down next time after things get wrapped concerning the gentlemen
Review By [wonderbee
] • Date [8 Nov 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from LFW
Xander in town and he can talk is a fun twist
Hoping for more
Review By [LFW
] • Date [7 Nov 13] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Eighteen" from Jimbobob
Quite a fun story so far. Seeing/reading Jean destroy the Gentlemen will be fun.
What I'm most looking forward to/hoping happens is Fury's blackmail on Xander coming to light.
Review By [Jimbobob
] • Date [7 Nov 13] • Rating [9 out of 10]