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For the Motherland

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Review of chapter "Natasha Redux" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Natasha's choice of the simple life or returning to it is interesting. Does she have a replacement leg? The soul-magic reminds me a lot of the secrets in Galaxy Express 999. Overall, I know you mentioned that you teach high school but you could be a game adventure writer as well, if you wanted to be.
Comments from author:
I have written for games, video and tabletop.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Jul 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "An Offer" from VillageOrchid
Review:
I'm still not sure what the "good neighboors" are unless they are the black stuff (Vrada Nishta?)- or what she might become with a voluntary bonding.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Jul 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "A Fairy Tale" from VillageOrchid
Review:
A very political dark-force, who knows better than to kill its minions. Very interesting.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Jul 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Annoyed" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Interesting that there is a native version of Buffy already in this world.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Jul 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Call Him Al" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Enjoying this vastly.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Jul 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "History" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Good explanations and shared epiphanies.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Jul 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Consciousness" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Greatly surprised that you have a post-portal Buffy rather than one from this world. That will help with the POV and tour stuff. Meanwhile Glory-era Buffy might have have known about Turok Han yet - so this could be a later Buffy or one from Glory-era that read some books that she didn't talk about. :)
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Jul 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Natasha" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Totally not familiar with your source material - enjoying the details and the tour provided.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [29 Jul 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Natasha Redux" from Zeviz
Review:
I liked this story too, but the mangled Russian was kind of painful to read, given that I actually know Russian. Anyway, it was an interesting story, and I'll keep reading this series.

PS The main character didn't sound Mary Suish to me: you said that she had been one of the best before "retirement", so it makes sense that she can do everything she did. (The escape from inescapable prison was the only point where I wondered "if it was so easy, why hasn't it been done before?", but other than that, I wouldn't worry about the protagonist's power level.)
Comments from author:
Strictly speaking there is no 'Russian' in this story. They're all speaking 'Varan'. Any differences are due to the dimensional changes.
Review By [Zeviz] • Date [29 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Journey Proposed" from Zeviz
Review:
IIRC, the phrase in the original fairy tale is "Izbushka, izbushka, povernis' ko mne peredom, a k lesu zadom". ("Hut, hut, turn to me [your] front and to the forest [your] back.") It's been quite a while since I've heard/read fairy tales, but I think I remember it correctly.
Review By [Zeviz] • Date [28 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Natasha Redux" from DieselDriver
Review:
Ok, to answer one of the other reviews, obviously she managed to get her leg back or to get a good prosthesis other wise she wouldn't have been able to trudge. Seems obvious to me. On the other hand, to answer another reviewer it seems obvious also that since in the redux she made sure no one found her and everything was in cash and no one who profited by it wanted to do anything to upset the apple cart and slay the goose that lays the golden eggs or coins if that be the case. Simple enough, I suppose, for Baba Yaga to arrange for her to keep the bag.
Review By [DieselDriver] • Date [24 Nov 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Plannage Coming Together" from DieselDriver
Review:
Damn! It's bad having a seriously annoyed office building chasing you. :-)
Review By [DieselDriver] • Date [24 Nov 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Some more pictures and a bit on Telekinesis" from DieselDriver
Review:
So if Marcus can pick up and move up to 200,000 pounds, can he pick up something he is inside of? For instance. If he's in a car can he move it forward at a speed worth worrying about, how about a small plane? Although he wouldn't need the wings if he was lifting it. But can he convert that "lift" into "push"? 200,000 pounds of thrust gets you up into the amount of thrust that a 747 has so if he could push that hard and maintain it for long enough he could fly a rather large plane across country. Could he lift a container he's in, into space?
Review By [DieselDriver] • Date [24 Nov 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Escape" from DieselDriver
Review:
"exhaling she slid between the car and the wall"

Heh heh. (dirty old man here...) At which point I'm betting she wished she had smaller teats.
Review By [DieselDriver] • Date [23 Nov 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Interrogation" from DieselDriver
Review:
See, this is what I mean about wrong vice missing words:

"Red Fleet had proscribed as mandatory for Troopers physical fitness"

proscribed is prohibited, prescribed is mandatory.
Review By [DieselDriver] • Date [23 Nov 13] • Not Rated
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