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Xander gets adopted

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Review of chapter "Chapter One" from KrisB
Review:
After all, if she didn't have as much of the Harris luck as her newly adopted son, who would she be?

Um, I read the reviews and you seem to haven't ever really put up a chapter 2. My guess from reading this... His daughter or grand daughter depending on time frame.

You mentioned that it was caused by the love spell... That rather complicates things because everyone their seemed to have lost the effect after while... So you'd have to have some one capable of time travel that just got hit and decided to change his life... O.k. That's sort of creepy.

You've got this so damn vague that you should just take out the star trek part and have mystery person that knows of Xander adopts him. It would work rather well for a starting point for her being any one that would like to raise him differently. About the only problem that I see, if you have it a time traveler of some sort they'll likely have to bring him back so he completes those "fixed points" that he was recorded as saving Earth.

I don't really see how he could be federation raised though as they are all about not screwing around with time. That mind set would get transferred to him. I don't see how this will work. What makes Trek great is the advanced tech and techno babble... Xander might be able to have an awesome education, but he wouldn't really be allowed to use it if he returned to the past.
Comments from author:
The person I originally had as the adopter was a vampire (and thus, affected by the love spell more deeply) who was sent back in time. The reason for the Star Trek was mostly because I didn't want to affect my ability to post chapters with a non-cross, and I ended up having Xander be Q's son in my head. I'll probably change that when I post a new chapter, if I can.

Though, interesting guesses all 'round. :)

Hope I can get out a new chapter soon, and that you'll like my other stories as well! (And please, if you can, review my other stories as well)
Review By [KrisB] • Date [14 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from djhardim
Review:
So far, so good.

Since this is a Star Trek crossover, the first person that comes to mind is Guinan.
Comments from author:
Hmmm. Interesting idea, but no, not in this case. Good guess though.
Review By [djhardim] • Date [27 Jul 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from Morgomir
Review:
Great story. Keep up the good work.
Comments from author:
Why thank you. Please read and review my other stories as well.
Review By [Morgomir] • Date [17 Jun 12] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from BlueEyedJedi
Review:
The Adoptive Mother in question....Is she a part of a know cannon?
Comments from author:
Sort of. All will be revealed in time.
Review By [BlueEyedJedi] • Date [21 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from sistercity
Review:
Suggestion 1: name the woman.
Comments from author:
Will do next chapter.
What's suggestion 2?
Review By [sistercity] • Date [19 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from cathyoden
Review:
Wow, what an ego buster sold, and to add insult to injury for a measly $800. On the other hand someone REALLY wanted him, but who IS she?
Comments from author:
Not telling! Not till next chapter anyway.
Love the review. Hope to get more like yours and to have writing worthy of such amazing reviews.
Review By [cathyoden] • Date [19 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from JediKnight
Review:
How about telling us who adopted Xander?
Comments from author:
Next chapter. Promise.
Review By [JediKnight] • Date [19 May 12] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from rothos
Review:
I have to echo WolfWriter, once you get things down on paper it becomes so much easier to write. I'm in the middle of writing chapter 2 for my Prototype 2 story and I'm referring to my notes. It keeps me on topic and not rambling. Good story so far.
Comments from author:
Thanks for the positive review and I actually agree with you. I ramble a lot too, and so that's why I write the whole story down first (basically a rough draft is my version of an outline) and then I make it better by typing it up. It helps me a lot and that way, if I lose things or get things to be too badly bad or off topic, then I can just look at my writing and try to make ideas pop into my head. Doesn't mean it works for everyone, but I also tend to have a very blank head when I'm not acting out sections of story.
Back to my original thoughts, I thank you for your review and hope to see more of it just like you.
Review By [rothos] • Date [18 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from Valandar
Review:
So... what is this a crossover with? It says "Star Tek - Other", but I have no CLUE who this woman is that's adopting Xander. Right now, the scene is incrediblly generic, and could be any number of people from any number of series, from Margaret Houlihan's daughter to Major Carter from Stargate SG1, to Donna from That 70's Show, or even possibly Daria from her show if we push her timeline back and Buffy's forward.
Comments from author:
Hehehe. Great ideas. I might even turn this into a series of universes where Xander gets adopted by different people! HEHEHEHE. You saying that it's so generic tells me that I did my job of being vague well and setting up 'Who she could possibly be?'. So, I think that it'll surprise you who it is that's adopting you.
Review By [Valandar] • Date [18 May 12] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter One" from WolfWriter
Review:
Okay, first off: Who is she? You never gave her a name.

Two: How does this fit in with Star Trek?

Three: Which one? Classic Universe or Reboot? Next Gen, Voyager, or Deep Space Nine?

Four: How old is Xander? Younger than five but older than three?

Five: Where will he grow up? On the Hellmouth or in 24th Century San Francisco?

Six: Will there still be demons, or will they have faded away?

Seven: If it's classic Trek, then it should be Roberta Lincoln and Gary Seven who adopt him. Take him to the planet that Gary grew up on and have Xander trained there, then return him to Earth, in whatever time period he will fit in with best.

If it's classic Trek, then don't have him tell Kirk and Spock where he comes from unless its absolutely necessary to the plot.

This story is pretty good for a prologue, but if you really want a good story, put your plot points down on paper and try to develop it from there.

Like who does what, with whomever, for whatever reason, in search of whatever object or to achieve whatever objective in whatever amount of time.

Once you get ALL of that straight on paper, THEN start typing up the little darling, and believe me, your story will go places.

Just don't get stuck on dialogue or have too much exposition. Those can bog a story down.

Give details, but not too many all at once.

I can't really think of anything else to add.

If you need further advice, PM me, and I'll see what I can come up with.
Comments from author:
I love all the advice you have given me, and I will do my best to use them all, but I will say that the first chapter basically came to me fully formed and with nothing else. That's all I had for this story, total, and am basically depending upon reviews to make it go further along.

One: I will give her a name next chapter, but I know exactly who it is and I'm not telling! (Least not till she tells you in the story. Hehehe)

Two: I was thinking of making a dream in the Star Trek Universe at some point in time, and I just didn't want this to just be a simple non-crossover story, but thinking about it now, and with your wonderful questions in consideration, I might make it a part of his past, just to screw with him. Hehehe. That'll be fun.

Three: I haven't decided yet. Suggestions?

Four: It's right as they're coming back from Christmas Break after it snows on Christmas, keeping Angel alive. That was the last episode I saw, so that's why I chose there.

Five: On the Hellmouth of course, or so we think. Hehehe.

Six: Demons. Definitely Demons. Maybe I'll have superdemons. Huh. *Think*

Oh, and the adoptive mother is doing this partly because of the love spell that backfired on Xander earlier in the year. You know, the one where every female in Sunnydale at the time, including Druscilla, fell in love with him but Cordy. Kinda. *Shakes head to get head in the game*

Thank you for your review and will try to mention you when I put in the next chapter to commend you for your help.
Review By [WolfWriter] • Date [18 May 12] • Not Rated
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