Good start of the bigger story. As a one-shot though... a bit too abrupt ending, a bit too much loose ends. Say, your description of gen.Hammond's actions at the beginning is GOOD, but as there is nothing tied to it in the ending, it's half-wasted. The talk with Buffy? Also interesting, and have a lot of potential - as a beginning of something. Basically, my advice will be - continue this fic, please. Had it been a first chapter of the unfinished story - I'd gladly rated it 9. As a "completed" story... 6 to 7. Anyway - thanks for the good work.
I could definitely see this as the start of a longer story, or even a series. I'm not sure that Buffy would be this open, but your portrayal of Gen. Hammond seems dead on target.
Review By [Rich] • Date [8 Aug 12] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Buffy might perhaps have been a little more cautious, given her reason experiences with the military, but Hammond probably came across as a good and honest man. He was always one of my favourite characters in Stargate (I much preferred him to Landry). This certainly has potential for future development.
Thanks for writing this.
Review By [Cordyfan] • Date [8 Aug 12] • Rating [9 out of 10]
I can't quite see Gen. Hammond as forgetting to *offer* help. Certainly, he knows they're likely to be less than happy with the military (though his reaching out like that might have much larger effects than he realizes). I also expect he's going to be listening to the news a lot more carefully, listening for the truly odd things that might indicate they could need help.
Nice! I could seriously see Buffy taking up General Hammond's offer after Sunnydale's collapse.
Something I've sometimes thought about is the Goa'uld always having known about Vampires and Demons while the Jaffa have 'legends' about a mighty warrior who defends human(and Jaffa)kind from Sokar's monsterous creatures who escape from Natu. I can just see Jack & Sam trying (and failing) to convince Teal'c that Dracula isn't real and 'The Exorcist' isn't a documentary about a real life event.
Review By [ChaosCarlos] • Date [7 Aug 12] • Rating [9 out of 10]