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Review of chapter "Chapter 5" from clei
Review:
Dumbledore turned to Willow, looking nearly apologetic. "It is a shame that you were not brought up to appropriately wield your magic. Without proper tools and tutelage magic has a tendency to take over. Do you understand what I'm talking about?"

Willow nodded, eyes drawn down as she watched her own fingers fidget with the hem of her blouse.

"You do not have to tell me what happened, and I probably don't need to tell you that the effects still linger." Willow nodded, finally pulling her gaze up. "But you need to know that any magic you do moving forward needs to be restricted to only that which does not harm. Healing, for example." He leaned back at that, his blue eyes sparkling once again. "And while transfiguration may not seem particularly harmful, it very much can be if used incorrectly."

>
>

If this is in fact taking place a year or so after Sunnydale bit the dust, I think you may be going a bit too far with the whole Dark Willow Bit. In fact I rather doubt Dumbledore and the rest could teach Willow anything that she hasn't already learned about herself and her powers already through bitter experience.

In fact Buffy and the others should be wary and concerned about Dumbledore and his crowd's attempts to "steer" them into certain directions as was seen here.

If Willow is going to be fighting Vampires and Demons, limiting herself to Healing Magic as suggested by Dumbledore is going to be worse than useless, as Willow and the rest of the Scoobies should already know.
Review By [clei] • Date [9 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 5" from ChaosLady
Review:
Interesting.
Review By [ChaosLady] • Date [8 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 5" from VillageOrchid
Review:
I'm enjoying your complex character set-ups, motivations and delivery.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [8 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 5" from Swordstress
Review:
Really enjoying this! And the characters are spot on!

I love how much Snape is underestimating Buffy...He's in for a surprise!
Review By [Swordstress] • Date [8 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 5" from Swordstress
Review:
Really enjoying this! And the characters are spot on!

I love how much Snape is underestimating Buffy...He's in for a surprise!
Review By [Swordstress] • Date [8 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 5" from Rich
Review:
Very nice work on the characters here, although I don't remember Lupin as being quite so naive; but compared to Severus I guess most people are naive. I like your version of Minerva - I always thought that she was smarter than she usually let on. I think the Order's idea of the Slayer is a litle bit off, but given the knowledge they have it makes sense.
Review By [Rich] • Date [8 Dec 13] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 4" from link
Review:
Love what I read so far. IMHO you managed to write Buffy-speak just right. Keep writing more.
Comments from author:
I'm so glad to hear this. It is so difficult to switch back and forth between Buffy and Severus. Talk about two people with completely different ways of expressing themselves! Yikes!

I'm glad you enjoyed and should have the next chapter up shortly.
Review By [link] • Date [3 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 4" from fayefree
Review:
The flo scene with Buffy was way over the top and much to long. I found myself skipping forward to get to the meat of the story(Buffy in Hogwarts), boy was I disappointed. The first part of the chapter was good, and meeting Hagrid was funny but a little vague.
Comments from author:
I can see why you might think the floo scene to be a little much. There is a reason for it, though. I don't want to give too much away, but I will say this - her death a resurrection will be a recurring and emotional theme. In fact, it's pretty important to one of the subplots.

And I can only assume that you were disappointed because the "meat" that you were looking for - aka "Buffy in Hogwarts" - hadn't happened yet. I should probably warn you now that this story takes a while to unfold. I spend a lot of time establishing the characters within their environment and setting up the dynamics between those who come from different worlds - specifically Buffy and Severus.

Finally - I'm not sure what you mean by vague, so I cannot comment. But if you'd like to offer something more specific as to why you felt this way, I love to hear it. Its difficult, as a writer, to look at things objectively and I often worry that I'm taking things for granted. j

Thanks for your feedback!
Review By [fayefree] • Date [2 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 4" from ChaosLady
Review:
Wonderfully rewritten! I can't wait for more!
Review By [ChaosLady] • Date [1 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 4" from cjsplace
Review:
The timelines and differences are a little confusing, especially since in the last chapter you mention Dawn, but she's nowhere in site. You also speak about the Hellmouth being closed by magic but not how?? Was this a side effect of Willow's meltdown?? There is no mention of the First Evil, minis, or Spike.

I'm really enjoying your story, and would be happy to help you with the HTML formatting. It only takes me a few minutes, and can jet the chapters back to you. Just something to consider.

Looking forward to how you resolve things.
Review By [cjsplace] • Date [1 Dec 13] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 4" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Delighted to see another chapter so soon. I was little confused about the transition to being on the plane to being in the airport, but other than that all good.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [1 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 3" from Rich
Review:
I like this version of Snape; he's not evil, he's just massively overworked. Congratulations.
Review By [Rich] • Date [1 Dec 13] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter 3" from AllenPitt
Review:
I like that the council & slayer are not much known about in the wizarding world & vice versa. Each will surprise the other quite a lot. Any chance of Spike showing up? Could turn out he was a squib from a prominent family.... They might want to try phoning up Angel just to see if he knows anything ...
Willow is the one who will be most affected by being at Hogwarts, I'd think. Will read all the textbooks, might try to get a wand, that sort of thing.Potions would be hugely interesting to her (poor Snape). Too bad Anya isn't around anymore, she probably knew all about Hogwarts. Maybe a portrait of her might be one of the walls? i.e. she was a student in the first graduating class or some such?
Is this year 5 for the HP-verse? Based on the 'decrees' from the Ministry, it sounds like it.
Hm--vampires seem to be socially acceptable in the wizarding world, at least slightly. Might be fun to see one encountering Buffy & realizing she's the slayer.
Comments from author:
Good call - it is year five.

I've had some thoughts on Angel and Spike, though I hadn't thought about Anya. It may be interesting to try and incorporate her into the story somehow.

And, oh yes, can't write about Buffy without vampires. That just wouldn't be right. They will play what I hope is an interesting part getting the plot off the ground.

Thanks again for your suggestions, by the way. They definitely give me something to think on.

FI
Review By [AllenPitt] • Date [1 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 3" from VillageOrchid
Review:
An interesting take on Severus point of view. He's clever and well read in his own world, which he has used as crutch against actually using his intelligence. Good establish that he was also over tired and stressed, because he would seem to be better at reasoning, planning and reacting than we saw - but again - you gave reason - and it was internal dialog not outward expression.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [1 Dec 13] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter 2" from VillageOrchid
Review:
Okay. This chapter established some of the AU elements on the Buffy-verse side, but I'm really surprised that especially after that season (six?) where everyone blended to fight Adam that Buffy doesn't appreciate Xander's practical way of thinking through things (or strategic thinking and planning) better.
Review By [VillageOrchid] • Date [1 Dec 13] • Not Rated
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