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Ship of the Line: The Death Star

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Review of chapter "An Impossible Rescue" from Bill
Review:
SWEET! Now if they only had some cloning cylinders...
Comments from author:
Yep, that would definitely take care of filling out crew positions at the entry level, and that I might just cover in a chapter or two...kinda making this up as I go along. Right now I'm just planning on filling key crew positions with regular Sunnydalers, SG-1 and possibly a joint multinational roster.

As long as I can keep to both the Buffy and Stargate timelines with at least a half-decent effort at preserving continuity, at least until the fateful day in 2012, then I can make this work. 1997 to 2012 is fifteen years, so there's a task ahead. I just need to find the page for each timeline, and then I'll have a much easier time of it.
Review By [Bill] • Date [16 Apr 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "An Impossible Rescue" from DCG
Review:
Hope you don't forget thoes guys rebling inside the docs. Would be nice to see them get away.
Comments from author:
Huh? Spell check much?
Review By [DCG] • Date [10 Apr 14] • Rating [7 out of 10]
Review of chapter "An Impossible Rescue" from storiescollector
Review:
Good chapter, Klorel captured, SG1 and Bra'tac rescued, but Apophis escaped. I wonder if they could find a owner for a slightly used Ha'tak?? And a couple of hundred Death Gliders?? Hope they can find a way to free Skaara. Looks like until sufficient defence space stations are built, the Vigilant Watcher will need to stay near Earth. Would a TIE fighter fit through the Star Gate?? If not, I expect that they could build a version that could. This would give the SGC a force projection capability that could be quite useful...
Comments from author:
Of course they COULD just move the Stargate to the Watcher...as for Imperial craft small enough to fit through, I would suggest the BARC speeder or its successor from "Return of the Jedi"

An owner for a "slightly used" Ha'Tak? I dunno; it would depend on the market value. What's Hathor's Blue Book say on that? Make and model? What year? Hyperdrive rating? Zero to light speed in what?What amenities and accoutrements does it possess? Any car salesman will tell you, details make your sale.

ROFL.....
Review By [storiescollector] • Date [10 Apr 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "An Impossible Rescue" from Bobboky
Review:
very good
Review By [Bobboky] • Date [9 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Prologue - Doomsday" from (Current Donor)JanessaRavenwood
Review:
Ok, stopping part way through the first chapter. I can't get beyond the following:

"NASA had been tasked with reactivating the Space Shuttle programme and taking the vaunted ships out of mothballs in order to facilitate evacuation of the civilian population, and the remaining shuttles that had not been destroyed in accidents were working overtime to ferry people to their rendezvous with what, incredibly enough, was a real, moon-sized weapon of terror, that would ironically now serve as the instrument of their salvation. Local aerospace engineering companies were tasked by Presidential mandate to build vast numbers of rocket ferries that would carry people up to the Death Star in droves, and passenger airliners were retrofitted with rocket engines to assist in achieving orbit and retrieval by the Death Star’s tractor beams; the engines were meant to get up to orbit only, with one chance to achieve their goal, as there would not have been enough fuel for a second attempt nor a rescue effort."
-----
No, just...no. That is so far beyond what is aeronautically feasible with that equipment that I barely have words to describe it.

EDIT: Well, the easiest fix would be to just say something along the lines of: "Realizing that the Earth's present day surface-to-orbit transportation capability was nowhere near up to this monumental task, they made extensive use of the veritable fleet of shuttles aboard the massive space station, which were more than capable of and designed for repeated orbit-to-surface cargo and troop deliveries."
Comments from author:
Glad you pointed that out, thanks. But please read on, and I promise I'll devote a chapter or two here and there to circumventing that little issue.

It's constructive criticism that improves the creative aspect of literary work, and this certainly proves constructive. Thank you.

Edit/Reply 10APR2014: sometimes the easiest fix isn't always the best one. with that in mind I suppose I should I tell you the second chapter clears up the first one as a premonition or a bad dream. Xander then get the chance to start over or make things better. From then on the knowledge of what's to come will return to him in bits and pieces, giving him the means to improve upon the situation as it stood in his dream.when the fateful moment arrives the surface to orbit capability of Earth's transportation infrastructure will be dramatically improved, enabling Earth to basically hyperspace everybody that the Death Star can't hold to other worlds thus saving everyone. Xander would then be able to blast the earth to rubble without incurring a single human fatality.
Review By [(Current Donor)JanessaRavenwood] • Date [9 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "An Impossible Rescue" from Edman
Review:
Good chapter.
Comments from author:
Meh, I'm only halfway through it; next chapter should hopefully finish it out, then I can proceed to the next part.
Review By [Edman] • Date [9 Apr 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "An Impossible Rescue" from Harry
Review:
Well, the trio of stormtroopers have done their job. They got SG1, Master Bra'tac and this Gou'ald leader. Now, its time to get them back to the Death Star, and then prepare for any possible retaliation.
Comments from author:
This particular Goa'uld leader happens to be inhabiting the body of Jack O'Neill's oldest friend since going to Abydos...and they'll be keeping him and Skaara nice and cozy on the Vigilant Watcher until they can figure out how to remove Klorel from Skaara's body. I imagine there might be a means that Imperial medical science has discovered to extract a Goa'uld symbiote from its host without a loss of life. And if it don't work, then when they meet up with the Tok'Ra those guys will figure out how to convince Klorel to let Skaara come out and play a bit.

Looking forward, there's still the matter of what to do with all those captured Jaffa and Death Gliders; who will serve and who shall remain loyal to Alpo and Junior? And there's the question of ultimate authority on board the battle station. It may be a foregone conclusion that Xander Harris and Co. will assume that role, but of course he and his will have to establish their jurisdiction. As with other SOTL fics of this site, any who would seek possession of the Death Star for their own or their country's purposes will have to get jurisdictional approval from the Moff.

Once all that's settled, then there's the issue of just what to do with the Hellmouth. I'm thinking Xander just might relocate the Sunnydale population to the Watcher...with their consent of course. You know, free will and all that business. ..
Review By [Harry] • Date [9 Apr 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "An Impossible Rescue" from grd
Review:
I love it. The scene of the stormtroopers entering the bridge fills me with glee too.
Comments from author:
Yeah...now what to do about old Alpo?
Review By [grd] • Date [9 Apr 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "An Impossible Rescue" from RoyalTwinFangs
Review:
Was short but still okay. You know I believe that "Katarn-class commando armor" is better then regular "Stormtrooper armor". Also the breach of the bridge kind of remind me of the one in beginning of Episode 4.
Comments from author:
Yup, except these troopers have much better aim and are smarter, to boot. Hellmouth experience and stormtrooper skills pay the bills...
Review By [RoyalTwinFangs] • Date [9 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Out of the Frying Pan..." from RedCalypso
Review:
I'm not going to touch what's going on with the Death Star,since other people already have. I have only one thing to say. Wilow, are you out of your FREAKING MIND? Carlos has half his thigh burned away and you're going to take him to your house for FIRST AID??? And "you don’t wanna end up in the hospital with that"??? The hospital is EXACTLY where he needs to be!!!

Edit: I went back and reread the scene. Nowhere does Willow give thought to bacta. Her main concern was that Xander would get into trouble with the police for what happened. She does think about contacting Giles or Xander, but let's face it. She has NO WAY of doing so at the moment, and Carlos needs help NOW. Again, he needs to get to the hospital, not go to her house for a bandaid. When you find an injured person, you do not deal in "maybes" and "what ifs". You get the best possible help right then and there. BTW, it was demonstrated several times that hospital personnel were just as deep into "Sunnydale syndrome" as everyone else in the show.
Comments from author:
Ok, try explaining "blaster wound" to the medtechs at Sunnydale Memorial; he stands a much better chance at healing if he's submerged in Bacta, doesn't he?

Edit/Reply 5APR2014: If you recall from when everyone was possessed by their costume personae, Xander, as Tarkin, suggested that the medical facilities on board the Death Star would be far better than anything planetside, so at some point, having consideref the circumstances, and being a bit of a sci-fi buff herself (unless I'm wrong), Willow might have entertained the possibility that Bacta immersion would help greatly, even if I hadn't made mention of it in that particular scene. And when Xander showed up at her home with the means to get everyone up to the battle station, she might have seen her chance to avoid having to explain a difficult situation.

And as far as the hospital staff at Sunnydale Memorial being under the same influence of Sunnydale syndrome as the rest of the citizenry, I may have made a slight departure from canon in that regard, but then this is the world of fan fiction, and in this world, nearly anything is possible so long as it's believable.
Review By [RedCalypso] • Date [5 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "The First One Through takes the First Hit..." from JamesBrown
Review:
interesting story so far, and I will keep reading,
but I think Giles figured out the COM system a little quickly
given everything is labeled in another alphabet
and his Canon dislike of computers.
but he is highly intelligent, and a librarian and a watcher
and used decoding books in many odd languages,
So I think We can give that a pass.

as to Buffy's expertise, when she went as a Victorian or
earlier noblewoman, I note that while it took her only seconds
to figure out and become proficient with the weapons systems,
when asked to configure the sensors,a likely less complex task,
she couldn't figure out what to do.
I'm thinking the magic of the slayer is downloading a subconscious
tutelage for anything that she thinks of as a weapon.

So as she needs them she's getting station defenses,
tie fighter programming, probably station internal security
now that they've got prisoners.
If she gets into the cockpit of a fighter she's going to be an ace,
possibly in minutes - no 'force' needed
and if she gets a hold of a light saber, how much, if any,
Jedi (or Sith) knowledge will she suddenly acquire?
but things like communications, engineering or life support
I think she's going to have to learn the hard way.
Comments from author:
Well, I think we can forget lightsabers as during the Dark Times, the Empire was endeavoring to purge all knowledge of the Jedi, and the Force in general, out of the galactic consciousness, and they damn near succeeded, too. Thus it stands to reason that nowhere in any of the Vigilant Watcher's extensive databases and servers would a basic schematic for a lightsaber be found.

As for the Slayer Essence basically downloading the working knowledge of the weapons systems of an Expeditionary Battle Planetoid, let's hope that it doesn't include that damned planet-killing superlaser!

Coming now to the G-Man, being a librarian and a Watcher pretty muchmakes Iit a foregone conclusion that Rupes will be an expert linguist, so figuring out how to transliterate from the Aurebesh to Romanized English alphabet should not be a hard thing, and if he has any questions still, then he can always turn to any member of the Trio after the extraction of SG-1, since they're all fanboys anyways. ..
Review By [JamesBrown] • Date [5 Apr 14] • Rating [6 out of 10]
Review of chapter "The First One Through takes the First Hit..." from Edman
Review:
Good chapter.
Comments from author:
I hope the next one's better...
Review By [Edman] • Date [4 Apr 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "The First One Through takes the First Hit..." from borgrabbit
Review:
A rhyming haiku review:

A cliffhangerfest
Putting heroes to the test
Please update soonest

•‼•‼•‼•‼•‼•‼•‼•‼•‼•‼•‼•‼•

Okay. Maybe not exactly a cliffie, but I still look forward to more.
Comments from author:
There shall be more; I just hope I can post it sometime this weekend, otherwise you'll see it next week sometime.

Oh, good job with the haiku: never read one that rhymed. Keep it up.
Review By [borgrabbit] • Date [4 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "The First One Through takes the First Hit..." from Darkblood
Review:
sweet!!! love it
Comments from author:
Ya gotta give the more minor characters in the story their moment in the spotlight from time to time...can't make a good story without them!
Review By [Darkblood] • Date [4 Apr 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "The First One Through takes the First Hit..." from grd
Review:
Love the Trek references mixed with the obvious Star Wars lingo. 3 commandos vs a hatak filled with Jaffa. Hmmm. Will be very very interesting. SG1 will have to revise many assumpsions about that verse when this is over.
Comments from author:
They wouldn't be the Geek Trio without the constant sci-fi references tossed about as well as the ever-present appearance of being permanent residents of Loserville...

Except this time their constant fanboy obsession with all things sci-fi may very well save their asses and those of SG-1, and by extension saving the day.

Next chap will show just how skilled in the art of war the Hero Trio has become. Adaptive camouflage and vibroblades in the knuckle plates of their gloves...quick, silent kills...plasma-resistant armor...ohhh, the list may very well go on, but I think it'll be enough for Warren and his boys to do the job this time.
Review By [grd] • Date [4 Apr 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
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