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Andromeda Unchained

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Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from DieselDriver
Review:
This was a very good story. I hope you write a sequel.
Comments from author:
Thank you! I have no immediate plans for a sequel; I have outlines for a couple of 'gap-filler' stories, for instance Hathor/Andromeda's meeting with the dying Egeria, but I am too far behind on my other stories to do anything about them at this time.
Review By [DieselDriver] • Date [19 Oct 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "You’ve been taken in and restrained" from DieselDriver
Review:
The comment about an African-American standing out at a NASCAR race would completely out of line and uncalled for. NASCAR fans and drivers are no different than anyone else in this country. Most of them don't give a hoot about skin color especially the drivers. All they care about is how fast they go. Sorry, please don't do that again. Say something funny instead like standing out like a leopard at a hog farm. Or a peacock at a dog show. You're creative, be creative.

BTW, there's some interesting reading here: http://nascar.about.com/od/drivers/a/africanamerican.htm
Comments from author:
A comment made by a character in my stories is not necessarily a comment I would make myself; merely one I believe the character might make. I got the idea for the remark from a YouTube video of a routine at a New York stand-up comedy club which described the typical NASCAR fan as white. I did look up the facts and found that the proportion of African-American fans, although lower than in the population as a whole, was high enough to make the comedian's generalisation inaccurate. At that point I considered not using the analogy but then decided that 'O'Neill of Minnesota' was likely to share the New York comedian's inaccurate perception and I went with it anyway.
Review By [DieselDriver] • Date [19 Oct 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from Morgomir
Review:
Great chapter. Keep up the good work.
Comments from author:
Thank you!
Review By [Morgomir] • Date [13 Sep 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from raxadian
Review:
I loved this story.
Comments from author:
Thank you!
Review By [raxadian] • Date [4 Aug 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "You’ve been taken in and restrained" from draconis
Review:
.
A very nice story overall.

I very much agree with RevDorothyL regarding eventual acceptance of earth military (modified) tech and tactics. Reminded me of the episode in which Carter demonstrated earth weaponry effectiveness by blowing apart from distance a swinging tree stump then in sniper mode shooting the rope holding it with a single shot...yet the Tok'ra and Jaffa seemed or feigned? being unimpressed...idiots.

Your development of Hathor from enemy to ally (and even friend to some) was well done. I would have much preferred to watch it develop in considerablyi more detail over the entire time period from their first meeting in the SGC to the Bregman interview, but for a short 3 chapter story you did a good job of covering the essentials.

Thank you.
Comments from author:
Thank you!

The Jaffa in the service of the Goa'uld are pretty much a Napoleonic army, without cavalry, if you take away their air support. Not only do they have no long-range rapid-fire weaponry but they have no indirect fire weapons at all. In this story I didn't have space to go into details of the Earth weaponry adopted by Hathor's Jaffa Legion but in my notes I have them equipped with plentiful mortars (easier to take through the Stargates than artillery) as well as MANPADs, machine-guns, and personal weaponry. Conventional Jaffa wouldn't stand a snowball's chance in hell against them; as in Becuzitswrong's 'Things to do in Colorado Springs when you're bored', in which a 4-man SG team with extra claymores and LAWS rockets annihilates a 250-strong Jaffa force.

I might write occasional gap-filler stories in this universe, in the future, featuring incidents such as Andromeda fighting to the death against an Ashrak, how the Tok'ra deal with the base on Tartarus where the Kull Warriors are produced, and the conversation between Hathor and the dying Egeria on Pangara. And I might reveal why Hathor and Andromeda call Jack and Sam by their first names but call Daniel 'Doctor Jackson'. But I'll only do that when I'm stalled on my other stories and want to do something different for a while.
Review By [draconis] • Date [2 Aug 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from ShyBob
Review:
I love "Bit Part" stories like this where minor characters are explored and fleshed out into plausible major characters. Your development of Andromeda was nicely done.
Comments from author:
Thank you!
Review By [ShyBob] • Date [2 Aug 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from RevDorothyL
Review:
A conclusion well worth waiting for . . . especially since you found a way for Hathor/Andromeda to save Janet, as well as incorporating more effective long-range weapons and tactics in the Tok'ra/Free Jaffa/Haktyl alliance repertoire. :)

Love it.
Comments from author:
Thank you!
Review By [RevDorothyL] • Date [1 Aug 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from purrfus
Review:
If I listed the best parts I'd be listing 2/3 of the story, so I think I will just go with ... Really nicely put together. Thanks for sharing.
Comments from author:
Thank you very much!
Review By [purrfus] • Date [1 Aug 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from (Current Donor)JanessaRavenwood
Review:
It really is too bad they didn't go with your version in canon. I thought killing off Dr. Frasier was a terrible idea.
Comments from author:
Thank you! Janet, like Tara and Egeria, is a character I always save when I can.
Review By [(Current Donor)JanessaRavenwood] • Date [1 Aug 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from MarcusRowland
Review:
Nice ending - Janet Lives! is always a good idea (now prove me wrong with a zombie Janet story or something...)
Comments from author:
Or a 'Janet gets taken over by a Goa'uld' story... but I don't think I'd write that. Janet lives in the 'Tabula Avatar' series (Airman Wells is cured in no time with a healing potion and there's no need for Janet to go to P3X-666) and Janet will appear in 'A Plague of Serpents'.
Review By [MarcusRowland] • Date [1 Aug 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from Sunhawk
Review:
Absolutely wonderful conclusion to the story!
Comments from author:
Thank you very much!
Review By [Sunhawk] • Date [1 Aug 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Resurrection Time" from (Current Donor)vidicon
Review:
Very interesting. I wonder how she interacted with Egeria when they found her.

Thanks for writing
Comments from author:
I considered writing the Hathor/Egeria scene; it would have included Egeria telling Hathor how proud she was of her and, after Egeria's death, Jack and Sam having to devote considerable effort to talking a tear-stained and furious Hathor out of nuking Pangara down to the bedrock.

Thank you!
Review By [(Current Donor)vidicon] • Date [1 Aug 14] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Perfect host for our dream" from Sunhawk
Review:
*offers Speaker's muse blatant bribes and blandishments to inspire creativity!*

Looking forward to it! This is a wonderful story that just seems to work very well with the characters.
Comments from author:
I still haven't managed to get the closing scene right. I'm happy with all the rest of the last chapter, now, it's just that one scene. And I have to stop now to go to bed. But I'm nearly there and I'll think about it more while I'm at work. I should be able to get it finished tomorrow.
Review By [Sunhawk] • Date [23 Jul 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Perfect host for our dream" from Sunhawk
Review:
Really liking this, but you indicated that this was finished and would be posted 1 chapter a day for 3 days, where's chapter 3? *whimpers, whines, makes begging noises*
Comments from author:
Sorry! Shortly before I was about to post chapter 3 I read it through and decided that it really didn't work as I'd intended. I held it back for a rewrite and still didn't quite get the effect that I'd intended. So I put it aside for a little while and worked on the chapter of 'The King of Elfland's Daughter' that I posted on Sunday. Now I've gone back to this - I'm busy with it at this very minute - and I'm making good progress. I'm still not totally happy with the very end - I can't come up with a last line that closes it off properly - but I'm not far off. I might even get it posted today if I can just get that last line right.
Review By [Sunhawk] • Date [23 Jul 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Perfect host for our dream" from Morgomir
Review:
Interesting so far.. Keep up the good work.
Comments from author:
Thank you!
Review By [Morgomir] • Date [12 Jul 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
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