Large PrintHandheldAudioRating
using
 paypal
Twisting The Hellmouth Crossing Over Awards - Results
Rules for Challenges

Forgotten But Not Forsaken

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking
Review of chapter "1: Making Something Out Of Something" from banner
Review:
Draco with horns...
This could be good. But what's going to happen when the Scoobies discover that these aren't really their children?
Review By [banner] • Date [28 Oct 05] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "2: Something Amiss" from Caliadragon
Review:
This is a very interesting concept and I really like the fact that of all of the children, Luna is the only one to remember.

Thanks
Calia
Review By [Caliadragon] • Date [13 Jan 05] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "1: Making Something Out Of Something" from (Past Donor)Kiara
Review:
I really liked it- especially cause Draco had lil devil horns tee hee. Two things puzzled me though, one: about the 'new' relations. Could you maybe do a family tree to explain which potterverse kids went where and also their ages? And two: do the Scoobies/ rest of HPverse know the truth or is it just Luna?
Great Story!
Kiara
xxx
PS: If this shows up twice, sorry- but my thingy shut down on me half way through. Damn computers.
Review By [(Past Donor)Kiara] • Date [12 Jan 05] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "1: Making Something Out Of Something" from (Past Donor)Kiara
Review:
I liked it. Two things though, I got a bit confused about the 'new' relations. Could you maybe do a family tree to explain which kid went where and their ages? And also do the Scoobies know the truth or is it just Luna?
Thanks for sharing!
Kiara
xxx
Review By [(Past Donor)Kiara] • Date [12 Jan 05] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "1: Making Something Out Of Something" from GeekGoddess
Review:
interesting first chapter....am kind of curious about the age differences and the reason of who was paired with whom. Hermi and Fred is one I would not of suspected....but cute idea since they are both nerd girls.....and the idea of Angel being Fred and Georges' parent is hilarious. I look forward to the next chapter
Review By [GeekGoddess] • Date [11 Jan 05] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "1: Making Something Out Of Something" from CPTSkip
Review:
Now this was something totally different. But it did catch my attention. Please write more. There didn't seem to be the Challenge at the end, however.
Comments from author:
Yeah, it was in a different format than the rest of the chapter and came out looking like box, so I'll put the challenge it's based on in the next part. I'm working on that tonight if I can. Glad you liked it!
~J
Review By [CPTSkip] • Date [11 Jan 05] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "1: Making Something Out Of Something" from IrisOwens
Review:
Interesting start and it seems like it has possibilities. The things I comment about below are not meant as flaming, just things that seem not quite right. It is a well-written story with nice character interaction, there are just questions and plot points that need clarification for me. You may believe this to be an over-analyzation of what's supposed to be a fun fic. If that's the case, my apologies.

I wonder: It seems the kids know they are not who the world perceives them to be, but the Scoobies and the Fang gang don't. If Dumbledore did a spell to 'insert' these children into the demon-fighters' lives, wouldn't the world's most powerful wizard somehow sense the spell used to 'create' Dawn's life and memory tampering? This should make him worry what the heck he was interrupting and possibly allowing his students to become subjected to or be influenced by? Do the children have all of their memories (with implanted information of their supposed histories) and are merely 15/16 year olds trapped in small bodies? If that's the case, they've got to be angry and frustrated about it. Are they just changed to age appropriate fake memories? Are their emotional states the ones of a (ie) five year old?

Why not have all the Weasleys together? If the Potter-verse kids have their memories, wouldn't they wonder where the heck was their brother? Maybe put Harry, instead of Ron, with Buffy. Sure, Harry is 'safe' with the Fang Gang, but as the Slayer's 'son', there'd be more protection than with Wesley as his primary relative. Sure, it's the Hellmouth, etc, but the Hyperion's not exactly safe, either, ie Gunn's fighting a demon while the kids' are present. The placement of Hermione with Fred certainly seems well-matched, as does the Luna/Tara combo. Draco as Lorne's son was an amusing concept. Also, Fred and George are supposedly two of a set of triplets along with Connor? Well, that kinda doesn't feel right. So, not only is there a miracle child born to two vampires, but it's actually three? (Do they need to digest blood? I seem to recall Connor needing that ~ might be just a memory trick on my part, though.) (By the way, two Freds in one location? Maybe call the boy 'Freddy'?)

It seems a bit of overkill to have so many children changed. I know there has to be a reason they were age-reduced and relocated (other than what I'm perceiving - they'd be cute and it would be funny. It could be cute and funny with less altered kids ... and more believable), so obviously, we'll just have to wait for it. Also, why these particular children? Since Harry is deemed of the utmost importance, I can see why he could need to be relocated, but the other children? Maaaybe (if you squint) Neville might make sense - he might somehow be interpreted as important to the Prophecy. Possibly, Hermione might make sense (since she has muggle parents and is close to Harry), although her staying with the Weasleys seems viable. I'd need to read more to accept why the Weasleys (who have a wizarding family to protect them) are involved. Most especially, why are Draco and Blaise included in this group? Dean and Luna? What is their importance to Voldemort (if that's who is threatrening the group).

Please note, the challenge wasn't showing when I read this. Also, the empty box it should have been in, makes the page extra wide. This makes it impossible to read completely from the left to the right without needing to shift the page from side to side with each line (which is always somewhat irritating). I just decided to copy and paste the text elsewhere, since that's a pet peeve of mine ... but no biggie.
Comments from author:
I really didn't know the challenge wasn't showing up. Sorry about that. I don't consider this flaming, and it actually helps me to focus on the weak points. The only one who realizes something is wrong is Luna - who is too young to say anything. The rest of the kids memories are altered to think they've been there all along. Dean doesn't know. I only had part 2 half written when I put part 1 up, and that explains more of the background info. There is a reason they're all split up, and a reason there's triplet miracle children. I just haven't gotten to get it down yet.
~J
Review By [IrisOwens] • Date [10 Jan 05] • Rating [6 out of 10]
Review of chapter "1: Making Something Out Of Something" from Caliadragon
Review:
This looks to be a very interesting fic and I look forward to seeing what happens next.


Thanks
Calia
Review By [Caliadragon] • Date [10 Jan 05] • Rating [10 out of 10]
StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking