The time has come, I must confess,
to put my skills to the test.
A rhyming review, today's the day
our inner poets come out to play.

William the Bloody, is now dust,
magical cheerleaders put up a fuss.
Drusilla the Mad searches for love,
she'll not be picky, when push comes to shove

Buffy the Slayer, now fills a grave
this damsel Angel was unable to save.
Alexander's mouth outstrips his brain
Queen C will surely cause him some pain.

Four new Jedi, and one Jedi-light
now take over the Hellmouth fight.
Will they cure their alien condition?
This line ends my rhyming rendition.

A good chapter. Raised quite a few questions, but that's the point, isn't it?
The whole Xander part was rather boring, and a bit annoying. Will we have some more of him? Because if he's going to be all growly and sad over Buffy, it'll get old real soon. I mean, I feel sympathy for him losing his friends, but is it really relevant to the story?
Do Drusilla's dreams mean something? I hope not, because that much insanity...
Was the Gwen part supposed to wrap things up for the Cordettes, or introduce them, because they'll have a part to play in the story?
The teasing between the pack was cute. Although I don't understand why Willow is letting Harmony insult her - 'everything is better with Willow-mocking'.
Deirdra and the hunt were fun. And Drusilla was simply hilarious, especially with her car antics. And I can't wait to see what'll happen with Marie and Drusilla.
Until the next chapter,
Meneldur.

You seem to be under the mistaken assumption that Xander's at all relevant to the story.

Yes, Drusilla's dreams have a meaning. Why else would I include them?

Gwen introduces the Cordettes; we'll see more of them in a few days.

Willow's motives... are her own. Explaining her would spoil stuff I don't want to spoil.

Um, weird, Drusilla is apparently sane now.
Huh, didn't see that one coming.

One question, though, which I'm hoping you'll make clear in the next chapter or two:
Is Dru somehow *ALIVE* now?
[EDIT] Sorry, between the original and the rewrite that plot point (Dru faking her crazy) somehow slipped entirely by me.
Chalk it up to my brain trying to simultaneously compare the two versions (original & rewrite) even while I'm reading the new version.

Err, a previous chapter had Drusilla stating that her mind had healed and she'd been faking her insanity for over a century... not sure how it's that big a surprise unless you're new to the story and this is a review for all ten chapters at once.

And no, no she's not. She's just smart. We've seen a vampire move around during the day using a coat for blockage; thrown on a hoody and she can duck her head and survive the trip from car to store without combusting. And that's assuming it's not an overcast day or anything.

-"Vone, tvo, thvee! Thvee dead vampires! Mwa ha ha!"-

I facefaulted at that.

having said that, it was actually kinda funny when I went back and reread it.

This is what I get for writing while drunk...

Another great chapter. Also after reading more about the different Lightsaber styles I can see another reason why Willow's skill in lightsaber combat isn't as advanced as the others, mainly because she is training using the twin blades which is a style that is harder to learn than when using a single.
There is one question I have in regards to a question posted by Tara tho. At one point Tara wonders why someone would use hilts that weren't reliably usable in all the forms that they are training in. This sounds like your hinting at another reason other than that was simply how Willow bought them. If that's the case could it be that maybe the hilts connect forming a Lightstaff, ala Ventress. That'd be cool.
I am kinda iffy on the having Deidre run using her arms as legs like an ape would, Togruta's don't seem to be built right to pull this off. But I haven't really seen many depictions of the Togruta's in video or comic so it might be so. It does make an interesting image tho.

Actually, Willow's problem comes more from learning seven styles simultaneously; she is close to mastery on one but isn't even done there, while the others all know at least one. So while Willow is very good at Ataru, it's not enough to counter Cordelia's mastery of Djem So and so for now, Cordelia remains the (barely) superior combatant. Jack of all trades, master of none.

The hilts were an oversight by Willow; she intended to dual-wield and wanted hilts that comfortably fit her smaller hands, but the knowledge of being a budding Weapons Mistress then presented her with styles she's not as equipped to use due to her choice of weapon. I'm planning to have her remake her lightsabers in the future by transferring all the components to new metal shells.

As for four-legged motion, we've seen Shaak Ti and Ahsoka Tano both do it. Unfortunately, how to describe it is difficult because the animator seem to have forgotten how humanoid hips and legs connect; the movement seems very feline (like watching a large cat run) but obviously the hind legs on a humanoid are incapable of moving in that way, not to mention the difference in arm/leg length making four-legged movement difficult. I brought it up more to emphasize the young, playful side of Deirdra.

Still feel sorry for Buffy.
Curious about Drusilla's activities.
What is the Pack going to do about the mayor?
Ciao.
^☻^

That's still over a season and a half away, assuming they're in Sunnydale that long and I choose to use that plot line.

Ok, DeadBuffy I can deal with, no problem... but NotCrazyDru??? I love it :). Especially a Dru trying to move into the almost-21st Century. This could be even more fun than 4 Jedi Scoobies :).

It gets better, trust me.

Great chapter!

Thanks.

Your story just keeps getting better and better. Nice to see Xander show up, even if he seems to be checking out of the Sanity Hotel. Even though I have no idea of where you are going with your nifty-neato characters, I'm sure it will somewhere smart, funny, and probably sexy. If you can't decide if it is going to be a Willow/Tara or a Tara/Cordy paring, go with a triad. They are aliens now and maybe their race goes for group marriages along with running in packs. I am liking Little D more and more and I still think Tara's mom is very nice. Dru is also becoming more and more interesting. The image of her hitting the Big Poufter with Spike's car amused the heck out of me. I can't wait for more of your terrific story.

It's just one more dent for them to hammer out when she gets body work done on HER new car. ^_^

Oh, HAPPY DAY! Revisions are done, story moving forward, and I LIKE modern Drusilla La Belle. Very pleased with the Xander marginalization; fast paced, humorous, engaging...all it's missing is some sex and I'd roll over patting my belly in contentment, following a full meal of brain candy.

He might show back up, only to realize... well, he's less than useless at this point.

I'm liking this story. Personally I found the whole "Buffy the Stripper" thing a lot of fun. My personal beef is de-powering her, but if the story deals with it well ( and it was) I don't mind it so much. I hate the "de-powering" of characters, it makes it feel like a fools mate, unless it's written with in the context of what a higher power might actually do. I'm sorry you had to remove it, but I can see your point of things not being fun to right any more cause of the whiners. On the other hand de-powering Buffy would remove her one way or another. Either she dies because some demon gets the drop on the "slayer" and kills her, or at this point in the show she'd just go back to being Jane normal for the most part.

I look forward to more of your kick ass writing.

Like I've always maintained, it was just a fun little subplot that some immature people couldn't handle. Oh well. Now she's dead instead of just depowered. Hope they're happy.

Another good chapter. And the last one that's was already written, so from now on, things'll be new, even if they take longer. I haven't noted much difference between this chapter and the previous version, but I still have a few comments.
I liked Tara comforting Willow, and Cordelia's take on things. It was funny and touching.
Again, I loved the conversation regarding the Forms, but that's probably because it's my obsession. I'd have liked to see the end of Willow and Tara's argument, though. Also, it's interesting and new to learn Willow knows Juyo. So to clear up: Tara knows Makashi, Delia Niman with emphasis on Djem So, Harmony Shii-Cho and Soresu, and Willow knows some of everything, and her second-best is Niman - so what's her best? Jar'Kai? Because I'm not sure that's really a form... it's mostly a blanket term for fighting with two blades. Admittedly, Niman was a two blade form and was adopted by the Jedi order, but in its' adoption it lost the two-blades, and simply meant balance/moderation, not necessarily requiring two blades. I think Jar'Kai shouldn't be considered a form, but a way of fighting. You can have seven different Jar'Kai users, but each one has mastery of a different Form.
Also, Willow knows Juyo? I'm surprised she was allowed to learn this. As Tara mentioned, by the Clone Wars, very few were allowed/wanted to learn it. Still, if she was training to be a Weapons Mistress, she should have. Although if she'd use it against Cordelia, i think she'd win - it's both chaotic and erratic, with a heavy focus on offense, with two sabers, it should be very hard to defend against - especially with a one long-hilt lightsaber.
Um, what the hell did Harmony mean when she said this: "You're all sneaky and Willow knows all kinds of lightsaber stuff and Cordelia can evidently heal people - and if you ever do that to me again, Rosenberg, you are a dead girl walking"? When did Willow heal Harmony?
Also, why are Willow's lightsabers 'a bit too short to two-hand comfortably'? is it because she bought them or something?
I can't wait to see the 'training session' with Deirdra, Willow and Harmony.
So, nothing new with Drusilla or Willow's dream from the previous version.
And just to clarify once and for all: in my message, I was referencing Vamp-Harmony as a humorous suggestion for Drusilla's new lover, as seen in the cards.
Until the next chapter/message then, Meneldur.

Willow didn't heal Harmony, Harmony was referring to Willow knocking her out and needing Cordelia's services.

As for Willow's lightsabers, I thought it was fairly self-explanatory: the handgrip space is simply too small for her to comfortably rest two hands on one saber for long periods because she bought them as a pair with the idea of having one in each hand.

You talked about Tara having Harmony evaluate Willow's and her sister Deirdra's lightsword fighting skill level. This would have been an interesting scene. Also they should have tried to find Xander before bed that day. Willow would have started insisting because of her worry for him.

Oh yes, because running around during the day as aliens or showing up at his house as a Togruta is such a brilliant idea. Tara's the only one who can mask herself and if the Harris parents even let her in, why would Xander trust her?

Oh please, let it be a vision of the future. But do they need the bikinis? Lol! I loved the fact that Dru knows very little about modern American culture, but she does know what goes into making a Big Mac. Lol!

Well, think about it. She had to spend her entire vampiric lifetime either crazy or playing crazy, not to mention most of it wasn't spent in America. How would she know? McDonald's, on the other hand, is everywhere and the slogan spread to other countries' advertising (including a Portuguese version in Brazil). That one, I can't see her NOT knowing.

Now I may be misreading, but it seems to me you missed the whole "wormholes are one way" bit, or there wouldn't have been any backblast *through* the gate.

also, shouldn't Xander be worried about where willow disappeared to, or have you offed him as well?

*sighs* Yes darling. And if the gate is outbound BEHIND Betsy, meaning stuff can pass through it and into the SGC... what happens if you send stuff like, say, a flame, through it?