Out of curiosity, what in the gods' green earth is a "bleep"? Is a beeper? Is it a cell phone with text messaging? Is it something you randomly created? Is it a non-American word? Because the only bleep I know of is when one "bleeps it out" as a way to get rid of obscenities. Explain what a bleep is (and how one bleeps someone else for that matter), and I would love to keep giving this a chance.
Your writing style is slowly improving, the premise is interesting, and your character development is improving as well.
Comments from author:
Bleep is just the noise a bleeper makes when it goes off. So when she says ‘Bleep me’ it means contact her via her bleeper.
Review of chapter "A killer disturbed" from Kenshin
Review:
Looking forward to the next chapter.
Review By [Kenshin] • Date [26 Jun 07] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "A killer disturbed" from CPTSkip
Review:
Very interesting. I did catch one error in spelling. Near the beginning you have the line: “We have a crime seen you are needed at. It should be “We have a crime SCENE you are needed at. Just being picky.
Review By [CPTSkip] • Date [26 Jun 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "24 Hours Earlier" from SlytherinWere
Review:
I love your story. I hope you'll continue it.
Review By [SlytherinWere] • Date [25 Jun 07] • Not Rated
Damn! Faith is dead. That sucks. But a Wesley who is as badass as Edward is just too cool. I really look forward to finding out just what the heck is going on. Lol!
Review By [CPTSkip] • Date [25 Jun 07] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "24 Hours Earlier" from superbrutal
Review:
I was trying to figure out who she was talking to and I've got to tell ya that good old Wesley didn't even make the list.
Its a good surprise though, I'm looking forward to finding out how he plays a role.
Review By [superbrutal] • Date [25 Jun 07] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "24 Hours Earlier" from Twoboots
Review:
This is a very good story, but killing off Faith still makes me cry.
Review By [Twoboots] • Date [25 Jun 07] • Not Rated
...I have one problem with this chapter, but it's very nit-picky.
Anita prefers "Ms." Blake to "Miss."
Comments from author:
I feel I need to have my wrists slapped. Being an avid reader of Anita Blake, and having just finished The Harlequin, I should have known that. I will edit the fic and mention you for your help.
Review of chapter "24 Hours Earlier" from littleoldme
Review:
There are some grammar/spelling issues in here, but I find the premise intriguing, and the characterizations are decent so far. A few things to fix:
+Hellmouth is one word.
+You're using apostrophes incorrectly throughout the fic- only use them to if you're trying to show ownership for something (as in, you could substitute his or her in for the word), or if you're using a contraction for *someone* is. Don't use them for plurals- so it should be vampires, not "vampire's," unless you're talking about something a vampire owns- same goes for slayers, watchers, Buffy Summers, etc.
+Wesley's last name is spelled Wyndam-Pryce.
Review By [littleoldme] • Date [25 Jun 07] • Not Rated
nerfherder
