The White Stuff (Angelus/Luna)
The White StuffAuthor:
J.K. Rowling is the owner of the Potterverse, and all the related little spawn running around Hogwarts (and Hogwarts itself). Never quite figured out who owns the Buffyverse, but I know for a fact that it's not me. And our title song is the property of Weird Al. Let's just go with 'not mine' and leave it as that.Summary:
Luna loves the white stuff…Joe's Note:
*blinks* You know you've written too much smut when you look at your own summary for a cute ficlet and your mind goes to dirty places…
Angelus, one quarter of the infamous and rightly-feared Scourge of Europe, was completely and utterly flummoxed by the scene in front of him. It was well outside anything his two centuries of life had prepared him to handle and so in the end, he decided to call for reinforcements. "SPIKE!"
"Bloody… obnoxious… poof…" There was the squeak of the wheelchair's old and battered wheels as his grandchilde rolled into the kitchen, making sure to smack one of the armrests into Angelus's leg in the process. "What?"
Gesturing to the blonde sitting Indian-style in the middle of the kitchen floor, Angelus sighed. "Care to explain what your childe is doing, Spike? Because honestly… and this comes from the one who sired Drusilla… this is bizarre."
"The first one was a sweet one, second one was a blast. Soon I finished off the bag, ate 'em up real fast. You can see 'em in my fangs, tell it when I talk, if my pancreas worked it'd be going into shock…"
Spike looked from Angelus, down to his childe, and then back up at Angelus. "She's eating. Singing, too, if your ears aren't working anymore. I've heard that hearing loss starts to set in when you get past a certain age…"
Gritting his teeth, Angelus leaned down so he could hiss into his grandchilde's ear. "Your lass is sitting on my kitchen floor, buck naked and eating cookies."
Spike shrugged and rolled back over Angelus's foot as he retreated from the kitchen. "Well yeah. Drusilla picked her out and I warned you that her chums called her 'Loony' Lovegood. What were you expecting, Peaches?"
"I love the white stuff, baby, in the middle of an Oreo. I love the white stuff, baby, it's the most delicious thing I know…"
Angelus's eye twitched before he stomped past her, grabbing his coat as he slammed the back door open. Why him? Had he offended some god somewhere? What had he done to deserve this kind of punishment?
Oh, right, the dead gypsy girl.
Still. This was just cruel and unusual, damnit.