BtVs created by Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy, Muppets by Jim Henson Productions.
Yet another 'Woke up in Vegas' pairing.
Thank you, Bobboky, for the diet bit :D
"Worse yet, we're married," I said, holding up the certificate.
"No, no, I do not believe this! This is all your fault!" Mrs. Piggy-Angel yelled, grabbing the paper from my hand. She read it through and groaned. "Hmph. You should have told me you were human."
I took a second to look her over. Considering my recent diet, she smelled vaguely of food.
"Listen, I was drinking to forget. Not that I was human, that I was a puppet. It was just a spell cast to save my life."
"Well, you don't have to go around breaking a woman's heart... Please at least tell me that we didn't get married by an Elvis impersonator. That would just be so... tacky."
"No, I can safely say that we weren't," I answered truthfully as I looked through the Polaroids of the space-themed chapel.
In those photos, I saw something which truly made me angry. My demon fought to surface. I checked myself, managed to keep my face in control, but my eyes had probably turned yellow.
"I can't believe this!" I yelled, nearly tearing the hateful image in half.
"What is it?" she asked, hurriedly pulling her clothes over her short and well-built body.
She was well-proportioned for her height. The night before when I'd been drunk and about her height she'd had a much greater impact on me.
"Well, I'm not a scifi fan-boy and lady," I said as I waved the picture around. "You don't look the type."
"Well, I did use to act in a show called 'Pigs in Space'" she said huffily, annoyed at having lost track of the conversation.
"Whatever," I snapped at her, then I caught myself. I'd been taking my anger out on her and... "I'm sorry, but I trusted him, I..."
I handed her the pictures and continued to explain as I pulled on my clothes. "Even drunk, I wouldn't pick that place. The black-haired man right there? The one with his back to the camera? That's Xander Harris. He was supposed to keep an eye out for me, so I wouldn't have to go through this alone... I trusted him, and not only does he let
me get married in Vegas, he picks out the chapel!"
After a few more hurried words, I threw open the door that connected my suite to Xander's, only to see the one-eyed man himself standing there, about to knock.
Before he or l could speak a word, Mrs Piggy-Angel had launched herself forward.
She executed an incredible high kick - "HI-YA!" - which landed firmly in Xander's crotch.
He sank limply to the floor. If he still had both eyes, they'd have crossed.
Before my wife, the puppet-pig, could begin to gloat, she was suddenly tackled by an invisible force.
Of course, I leaped to her rescue.
Everybody began to roll around the floor in a wild tussle of arms and legs
... Some of them invisible.
Eventually, the panting Xander was able to gasp out a command to stop.
Well, the 'fight' ended abruptly.
"Hey, I know what you're thinking," Xander stated. "But I was at least as drunk as you. I'm sorry. I've got to introduce my new wife."
"Don't tell me you married a storm demon?"
"No... Marci Ross."
"The invisible girl who tried to kill, well, everybody?"
"Yeah, but the government gave her some training, she's not that bad now..."
Concentrating, I could just barely make out the glint of a ring on an invisible finger.
I sized up Xander's new wife and my own.You know what?
I thought to myself. I'm better off.
When she had enough energy to talk, my wife let out a breathless squeal: "Well, Angel-honey, aren't you going to introduce me?"
After 'proper' introductions were made, the new Mrs. Piggy-Angel turned to where she thought Marci *must* have been standing and asked: "One question... Who does your hair?"
This was going to be a long day.