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The Dangers of Shopping

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Summary: Shopping is evil. Period. Response to FaithUnbreakable's Four-Letter-Drabble-Challenge. Buffy/Lex

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Smallville > Buffy-CenteredtxalbFR131518142,2652 Oct 062 Oct 06Yes
Title: The Dangers of Shopping

Author: txalb

Rating: FR-13

Spoilers: None. This could be placed anywhere in season 1 or 2 of Smallville and post season 7 of Buffy.

Summary: Shopping is evil. Period.

Disclaimer: I am not associated with either Buffy or Smallville and claim no rights to them.

A/N: This is my response to FaithUnbreakable’s Four-Letter-Drabble-Challenge. I’ve never tried to write something short like this before (of which the hardest part was making it exactly 500 words). The work you see before you is the product of a bored mind with too much time on her hands while at work. Let me know what you think (and yes, I know, Lex really isn’t in character here).

So here are my prompts:


And on with the story:

How did he get himself into situations like this?

“What do you think of this one?”

His eyes briefly flitted to the monstrosity perched on her head before dropping back to the floor, hoping, praying that it was a rhetorical question. She impatiently tapped the toe of her heeled boot, and any chance he had of a mercifully quick easy-out died a painful death. Apparently silence was not the way to go in this instance seeing as how she seemed to take the lack of response as a negative.

Of course there was no right answer here.

“Are you sure it’s not the right one?”

He was a respectable man, well liked by many— okay, perhaps feared was the way to go with that one, but in his line of work you didn’t exactly make friends— he had so many things going for him. Other business men trembled at the mere thought of facing him across a conference table, and yet here he was—

“It took me forever to find this, Lex.”

—felled by a demon from the deepest pits of hell trapped in a body which exuded innocence and charm asking him about the one equalizer of men across the globe.

“I can’t believe you don’t like it.”

Fashion advice.

“Buffy… I uh…” She turned her gorgeous green eyes in his direction, finally diverting her attention from her reflection in the mirror… which only made things worse for the young billionaire. Now he had to do this head on.

What happened to the suave man who had a cool head for every type of situation? The one who had learned not to crack under pressure. Years of verbal sparring with inferiors and turning insulting into an art, right down the drain. The charm that had served him so well throughout his younger years had abandoned him with the onset of one trembling lower lip and the hopeful green-eyed gaze of the blonde looking down at him.

His father would have a field day with this.

Perhaps he had become too complacent. Things had been going too well. The shoe had to drop sometime. Only this time, the shoe looked suspiciously like a floppy Easter bonnet, luridly pink and bright enough to flag down vehicles three counties over.

“Well?” She asked irritably.

Crap. He had waited too long. Desperate times called for desperate measures, and he was a desperate man. He reached in his pocket and pulled out his keys, “I… uh, left something in the car, I’ll be back.”

And with that he turned on his heel and left. Not retreated, left. Luthors didn’t retreat.

In his haste to exit the building, Lex Luthor completely missed the smirk that appeared as she removed the repulsive hat and tossed it carelessly behind her, all the while watching his exit.

She whistled a jaunty tune as she moved to follow him. After all, it wasn’t every day she was able to one-up her boyfriend.

Plus, he looked really good from behind.


The End

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