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I Meant to Say That

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Summary: Drabbles inspired by everyone's favorite, most common, most ridiculous, or just plain fortuitous fandom misspellings and typos

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Movies > GodzillaRemingtonSmytheFR181719021,11524 Oct 0624 Oct 06No
Drusilla remains the property of Mutant Enemy and Godzilla that of Toho Co. ltd. Jack, should anyone care, is my very own cardboard cutout creation and he will be deeply mourned for at least five seconds, I'm sure, by all my loyal readers. Any donations sent to me will be passed on to the family of poor Jack and should not in any way be construed as me profiting from the exploitation of Dru or the Big Guy.


"He's coming!"

Nothing unnerved Jack more than his sire in a good mood. At this point it was beyond abundantly clear that the bitch was loco and it had only gotten worse since she'd returned to collect her fledges after her old man sent her packing from the Hellmouth. In fact, she hadn't done anything but eat and whine about her 'Poor Spike' being corrupted by the 'Nasty little Slayer' in weeks.

It had gotten so bad, he'd got the whole group together and slaughtered a barge crew, catching a ride all the way to Tokyo to try and get her to shut up about it. Not that he would ever say that to her face. He shivered as she stopped for a moment to favor him with a very disappointed and... somehow sadistic pout. On second thought, maybe even thinking it was a bad idea. There were some subjects best left forgotten until crazy psychic killers were far enough away that you didn't have to worry about them.

"Baby Blue needs a bottle, Miss Edith. Such pretty green fire he'll make. He'll heat it up all nice and warm."

On the bright side, it didn't sound like the 'he' on his way would be Spike. But Jack didn't think he wanted to meet anything that could make Drusilla this happy just by showing up.

He glanced across the rails into the harbor. The night still hung softly, with the busy city noise floating across the water. He felt the deck shift slightly under his feet, like another ship was passing, but he couldn't see anything. Up by the bow, he saw the water start to bubble and boil.

"Hey, um, Drusilla? This guy that's coming... You said he made fire?"

"Oh yes! Pretty green fire to heat up his bottle. He'll make such beautiful carnage, won't he Miss Edith?"

This was sounding more and more like the kind of party a vampire wanted to avoid. The bad feeling in Jack's gut began to multiply like rabbits, but he knew even before he heard the ear-splitting roar that it was far too late to contemplate running.

The head came up out of the water, reminding him of the fin of a surfacing shark, and immediately let loose a jet of fire that melted everything for a hundred yards. The creature swung a clawed hand at a nearby fishing boat and tore it in half. An entire section of the docks collapsed as it took it's first step out of the water and set the city aflame, continuously screaming that hideous shriek that had heralded its arrival.

The air raid sirens cut on as the Japanese Defense Forces began to mobilize, but anyone could see this thing wouldn't be leaving until it decided it was time to go.

Jack was almost ready to believe they were ok on the barge, with the lizard thing heading into the city. Of course, most people don't consider all the consequences of facing a ten story reptile. The tail, for instance, stretched out quite a distance. To a regular human, it held literally a crushing weight. Vampires as a rule were less impressed with blunt crushing attacks - probably due to their lack of breath requirements. Unfortunately, however, the power of a large blunt object can be just as destructive as the sharper, more controlled weapons a Vampire normally has to fear. Jack didn't even have time to notice the way Drusilla moved back just before the tip of the monster's tail swept across the deck, moving at just the right height to knock his head cleanly from his body. Drusilla's laughter filled his ears as his body decomposed on the spot.

"Oh, what fun! Isn't it a lovely party, Miss Edith?"

He knew should've walked into the sun the minute she started to cheer up.

The End?

You have reached the end of "I Meant to Say That" – so far. This story is incomplete and the last chapter was posted on 24 Oct 06.

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