Large PrintHandheldAudioRating
using
 paypal
Twisting The Hellmouth Crossing Over Awards - Results
Is your email address still valid?

Letters to the Gods: Spike and Xander

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking
Story

This story is No. 1 in the series "Letters to the Gods". You may wish to read the series introduction first.

Summary: Xander emails Aphrodite about his love life.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Television > Xena-Hercules > Xander-CenteredDarkDesignFR181750033,58029 Oct 0629 Oct 06Yes
I don't own anything!

Xander & Spike

TO: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
FROM: xander@sunnydale.net
DATE: 12 April 2001
SUBJECT: Demon Magnet

Aphrodite,

Why Me?

Xander

_______________________________________________

TO: xander@sunnydale.net
FROM: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
DATE: 12 April 2001
SUBJECT: RE: Demon Magnet

Xanny-

Why Not?

Dite
_______________________________________________

TO: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
FROM: xanders@sunnydale.net
DATE: 12 April 2001
SUBJECT: RE: Demon Magnet

Aphrodite-

But I don't want to be a Demon Magnet!

Xander
_______________________________________________

TO: xander@sunnydale.net
FROM: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
DATE: 12 April 2001
SUBJECT: RE: Demon Magnet

Xanny-

How about I send you a nice tame one?

Dite
_______________________________________________

TO: spike@vampiresneedlovetoo.net
FROM: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
DATE: 12 April 2001
SUBJECT: Nummy Treat

Spike-

I found you a nummy treat. Meet him at the Bronze at 11 pm on Saturday. He'll be wearing a bright yellow shirt. You can't miss him.

Hugs and Kisses-
Dite
_______________________________________________

TO: xander@sunnydale.net
FROM: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
DATE: 12 April 2001
SUBJECT: RE: Demon Magnet

Xanny-

I found your tame demon. Meet the demon of your dreams at the Bronze at 11 pm on Saturday. Wear a bright yellow shirt and your demon will find you.

Hugs and Kisses-

Dite

_______________________________________________

TO: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
FROM: xander@sunnydale.net
DATE: 15 April 2001
SUBJECT: What the Fuck?

Dite-

What the fuck was going through your mind when you set me up with that... that damn vampire? Sorry about the four letter words, but did you totally lose your mind over the last couple of millinium?

I don't get it. What did I ever do to deserve being a demon magnet? Buffy and Giles stop searching out the demons they need to destroy. They just send me out to play in a cemetary and watch from behind a tree. When the demon comes, they jump out and "save" me. I'm getting tired of these so called rescues. Hades, Dite, even Angel calls for me to come to LA when he can't find a demon he's looking for. The last thing I expected or wanted was for a beautiful goddess like you to pull something like this.
Why Me?

Xander

PS: Besides, Spike's a man.

_______________________________________________

TO: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
FROM: spike@vampiresneedlovetoo.net
DATE: 15 April 2001
SUBJECT: What the Fuck?

Aphrodite-

What the bloody fuck was going through your mind? How could you offer me such a nummy treat when you know it's impossible for me to have it? First, because of the chip in my skull which has caused me all sorts of harm, I can't suck his blood. And second, he's straight.

So, am I suppose to be his friend or something? Isn't the chip enough punishment for the hundreds I've killed? I'm not souled. I don't feel remorse, and I don't brood. Let's leave that to my poof of a grandsire.

Spike

PS: Isn't Athena or Hera suppose to take care of the whole punishment racket?

_______________________________________________

TO: xander@sunnydale.net, spike@vampiresneedlovetoo.net
FROM: aphrodite@passion.olympus.gods
DATE: 15 April 2001
SUBJECT: RE: What The Fuck?

Boys-

I'm telling you, you are meant to be together. The UST between you two has started fires in the viewing room here on Olympus. Darlings, even Ares has mention that you two "just need to fuck already," and all he cares about is war. You two just need to go out together and get to know each other.

Well, got to go for now. Herc is visiting, and I want to flirt with Iolaus. That always makes Herc mad.

Love Y'all-
Dite

PS: Xanny, Spike wants you as his nummy treat! I swear to Zeus!

_______________________________________________

TO: spike@vampiresneedlovetoo.net
FROM: xander@sunnydale.net
DATE: 17 April 2001
SUBJECT: Is it true?

Deadboy Jr-
Is it true? Was Aprhodite right when she said you wanted me as your nummy treat?

I've never thought about a guy that way. Well... there was Larry, but he propositioned me. And... Angel, but that was only cause I was trying to see what Buffy saw in him. And...

Oh hell, okay, I've thought about it. I thought about you (especially that time that Angel offered me to you as a snack). But I've never done anything with a guy. Besides, I get why you would want me anyway. It's not true, is it?

Xander

_______________________________________________

TO: xander@sunnydale.net
FROM: spike@vampiresneedlovetoo.net
DATE: 17 April 2001
SUBJECT: RE: Is it true?

Nummy-
It's true. Don't get me wrong. After Dru and all this shit with Buffy, I'm not allowing myself to fall in love with you (besides, vampires aren't suppose to love, just maim and kill - which I can't because of this bloody chip). But I do want you.

What do you say, we try a date this Saturday? How about dinner and dancing in LA?

Spike

The End

You have reached the end of "Letters to the Gods: Spike and Xander". This story is complete.

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking