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Cultural Learnings of Old Ones

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Summary: Borat interviews Illyria, and soon may be prepared to give up on Pamela Anderson.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Movies > BoratWiseFR1512320102,2696 Nov 066 Nov 06Yes
Cultural Learnings of Old Ones for Make Benefit Glorious Kingdom of Vahla Ha'nesh
by P.H. Wise
An Angel crossover spamfic

Disclaimer: I don’t own Angel. I don’t own Da Ali G Show. Angel is Mutant Enemy’s. Borat is Mister Cohen’s character.


Borat smiled cheerfully as he continued his interview. This American was a very strange woman, but she put up with him, so he kept on talking to her. "My country has many problem,” he was saying, “Social, economic, Jew. But is very fine country."

Illyria gave Borat a level look, as if gathering up her patience. “In my time, my slaves would have sooner fallen upon their own swords than pollute my hearing with such trivial concerns."

Borat brightened. “Your time sexy party? I bet you best prostitute in land! You outfit very pleasing to the testes satchel, make mouth party?"


Taking her silence as an encouraging sign, Borat grinned widely. “High five!”

Illyria lunged at Borat, and...


The ‘technical difficulties’ screen replaced the view of Borat and Illyria. The sounds of Borat shrieking in agony followed, accompanied by peaceful, ambient music, the sounds of birds chirping, and a creek flowing over the stony creekbed.

After a few minutes, the shrieks stopped.

Then Borat asked, “You is very S&M? In my country, we like make suffer too, except it is only to the Jew.”

And Borat’s shrieks resumed anew. “Safety word!” he yelled, “What is safety word?”



Author’s note: Borat > All

The End

You have reached the end of "Cultural Learnings of Old Ones". This story is complete.

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