The Power Within Me
Title: The Power Within Me
Author: Rebecca or red_pixie88 or dust_ashes2003
Disclaimer: Don't own anything
Summary: after displaying some powerful magic in front of Dumbledore,
Dawn is excepted to attend Hogwarts where she meets a certain Draco
Spoilers: Up until "The Gift," Season 5 of BtVS; SS/PS, CoS, PoA, GoF
A/N: I got a beta reader so no one (eyes search look into all the
readers eyes) can bug me about my lack of spelling and grammar
skills. (triumphing laugh) bwahahaha.
May 27, 2002
I have been staying with Giles in England since Mom and Buffy died. He didn't think it was safe for me in Sunnydale. Willow, Tara, and Xander have been taking care of the Hellmouth until Faith gets out of prison to help them. No one has seen Anya since Xander left her at the altar. Everyone fears she returned to vengeance. I don't blame her. Xander was a complete idiot. Now he's tolerable.
Spike couldn't handle living without Buffy. I don't think many people can. So he went to L.A. to see how Angel did it without her. He now works with Angel Investigations. I'm not surprised he stayed. Even I can see Angel still loved Buffy. I miss him. Spike, Giles, and Angel were the closest people I had to a father. Xander was mostly just a friend who makes things fun.
In the back of my mind though, I knew that no matter how much they cared about me, the only reason they stayed, or fought, was for Buffy.
Everyone loved her, loves her still. I love her, too, but in a way I
resented her for that. She was the beautiful superhero. But she's never coming back.
I was relieved to leave Sunnydale, the place of nightmares, monsters, and memories. I would have to watch the ones I care about die or leave like Jenny, Angel, Cordy, Wesley, Mom, Spike, Anya and Buffy
The remaining Scoobies won't last long without the slayer by their side, to help them, support them, and I think they know that. It was probably why they pushed me away. Even here I rarely see Giles. He always had some business to attend to. At first I thought he was getting down and dirty with Olivia. But mostly it seemed like he didn't care. That's probably why I haven't told him my secret.
I've been changing. Getting stronger, faster, more powerful. I know it has something to do with me being the Key, or that I share Buffy's blood. It's like the magic is coming back to me slowly. After awhile it got easy to see magic residue. I know that it sounds ridiculous. But magic does leave a trail, like radioactivity. It didn't take long to figure out that Giles' business has nothing to do with the Watchers Council, or even Olivia for that matter, unless they embraced magically every day.
But I didn't question him about it until much later. I took advantage of all the free time he gave me. I went through his magic books, expanding my knowledge. I couldn't keep my power a secret forever. And I was probably powerful enough to be sensed by vampires already. I would need to protect myself. Even with my strength I have, like, no coordination at all. And it would take me longer to train than to learn magic, considering I'm made out of magical energy.
God, I can't believe I said that. I would rather research then learn slaying techniques. Buffy would be happy. She never wanted me in danger. And usually I didn't care about what was sensible. I always wanted to patrol. She would never let me. She was right. But now I can stand my own by using magic.
I closed my diary. I wrote that entry three months ago. I was too busy studying after school, before school, and in between classes to write anything else. I think I took magic a little too seriously.
Now I know seven languages: Latin, Sumerian, Gaelic, Aramaic,
Chinese, Fyarl, and English. I may have gone overboard. But once I saw what I could do, I couldn't stop. I promised myself I wouldn't turn into Willow. And I won't. But now I don't even need words to do spells. I can look at something and it will change. All I could do was tell myself everything I did was necessary.
Most of them were protection spells. I had at least one thing that belonged to everyone I cared about. So I made a protection circle. Their belongings represented them, like an element. I placed their elements around me in a circle, chanted to the goddess to bind them to my power. I know it sounds extreme, but to me, it's necessary. As long as I am alive, or more technically as long as the Key's energy exists, they can't be hurt. All that can kill them is old age.
I placed wards on overly public buildings, so vampires and demons can't enter. I was pretty proud of myself. But what I really wanted was for someone to share that pride with.
I didn't know if any of it had really worked until...