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Snack Foods of the Galaxy

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This story is No. 4 in the series "A Little Planet We Like To Call 'Home'". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: Food is the one constant across the universe.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Stargate > GeneralSpiffydaWonderSheepFR1371,54802928,8358 Dec 065 Jun 07Yes

Guidelines for Interplanetary Dining

Disclaimer: Not mine. No money.

Guidelines for Interplanetary Dining
1. Watch what other people around you are doing. Copy them.
2. If everyone around you is staring at you, you're probably supposed to eat first.
3. Pick something boring-looking to start with. White, beige, and brown are usually safe colors.
4. Look for utensils before resorting to fingers. Even if Ronon Dex is in your party.
5. SMALL BITES! SMALL BITES! This lessens the possibility of being overwhelmed by a spicy or a bad taste. DO NOT BE DR. DANIEL JACKSON!
6. All off-world Slayers are to carry EpiPens and be trained in their use. Unless you are on a mission with Dr. Rodney McKay, in which case, carry three.
7. The galaxy is a large place, with many different cultures. We do not expect you to always automatically know what is taboo for the peoples you are visiting. We do expect you to run fast, so don't fill up.
8. You will, at some point, have a physiological reaction to an organic compound. It happens to everyone. Don't be embarrassed, and report all reactions to the medical staff as soon as you come down. Also make sure to report the incident Dr. Marquez in botany for entry into the monthly General Jack "I did WHAT?!" O'Neill Memorial Award.

"I apologize, Dr. Jackson," Giles said. "We didn't know you were coming."

Jackson turned from his perusal of the whiteboard that hung in the kitchen, a grin on his face. "Oh, don't take it down on my account," he said. "It is a rather sensible set of instructions."

"Yes, well, after a few... incidents, Xander thought it was best to create something a bit more succinct than the SGC briefings."

"And it was a very good idea, but I'm curious about this..." Daniel tapped the whiteboard by number 8. "I'm actually a little hurt that I've never even heard of this. There were a couple of times I'm pretty sure I would have easily won, like the time on PX3-990, it was a culture very close to ancient Crete, except--"

Giles had removed his glasses. He pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and began polishing the lenses. "As I understand it, you and your team members have each won the award several times over, but, er... no one wanted to admit its existence to you."

"You mean to Jack," Daniel clarified.

Giles cleared his throat. "Yes, quite."
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