Large PrintHandheldAudioRating
Twisting The Hellmouth Crossing Over Awards - Results
Rules for Challenges

Girl with a Plan

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking

Summary: If Pansy Parkinson says she's your friend, don't trust her. If she invites you over, don't go. You might wake up hung over, in only your underwear, and in Malfoy's or Zabini's bed.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Harry Potter > Non-BtVS/AtS Stories > Theme: RomanceechoFR1513,8886134,08612 Dec 0612 Dec 06Yes
disclaimer: Not mine. They belong to Rowling. I'm just borrowing to suit my own sinister and perverted purposes.
shout: For dotty8608 who requested some D/G with a side of B/L and an uncomfortable dare. Just a bit to jandjsalmon too for all the rec'ing.


A girl with a plan was dangerous. A Slytherin girl with a plan could be right up there with an apocalypse. Pansy Parkinson had a plan. She had a damn good plan. At least she thought it was good plan, and that was probably the most dangerous part of the whole thing.


"Luna, I don't think this a good idea."

Luna tucked some errant blonde hair behind her ear and glared at her best friend. "Ginny, she's not like she was in school. Pans is quite different. She's trying to make nice. You are two of my closest friends now. I would like it if I didn't not have to dole out my time separately between the two of you. I'd like for you to give her a chance."

"Luna-" Ginny was about to just punk out and leave Luna to it.

"Do I need to dare you? Because I will."

Ginny glared. She was always hard-pressed to resist a dare. Especially if the dare-er knew she did not want to do it. The more uncomfortable she would be, the more determined Ginny became to actually complete the task.

"I dare you to come to tea at Pansy's with me... and I dare you to be civilized to her."

Bugger all! Gauntlet... thrown. Damn.

Ginny sighed. She didn't trust Pansy Parkinson as far as she could throw her non-magically, but Pansy was Luna's friend and coworker. Ginny didn't want to make trouble. She supposed she could make nice. After all, Pansy had turned out to be on the non Death Eater side of the war when it had been all said and done. She wasn't all bad. She just maybe had some questionable means to her ends.


"I'll behave. I swear it." She sighed again. "I just don't see how you can agree to meet at her place."

"It's just for tea."

"Luna, doesn't she live with Zabini and Malfoy? Aren't you worried you'll bump into those prats?"

"She does, and I've only seen Malfoy. He ignored me."

"Typical." Ginny muttered as the walked up the steps to Pansy's flat.


Pansy Parkinson knew how to do tea. Ginny would give her that. The china was very nice, albeit a bit Slytherin. The white porcelain had dainty little green snakes painted on it. Pansy was pleasant. She kept the conversation flowing. There was not a Malfoy or a Zabini in sight. There was a fire roaring in the fireplace. The room was quite warm and cozy.

Ginny's eyelids felt a bit droopy suddenly. Perhaps a bit too warm and cozy in here then.

Pansy was still talking on and on. Ginny noticed her cross the room and take Luna's cup and saucer from the blonde's limp fingers. Luna was out and half draped over the arm of the little sofa she and Ginny were sitting on. The redhead became alarmed. She tried to rise only to find her legs would not seem to mind her. She could not even make her arms move to draw her wand.

Pansy took her cup and saucer. "You're both fine, Weasley. Just a bit of a sedative. No harm here."

"Wh-wh-wh-wh?" Ginny slurred. Merlin help her, she could not even get her mouth to work properly.

"Why?" Pansy prompted. "All will be revealed in time. Just know I mean well. I truly do. I want an ounce of peace for me, and this is the way to it. Cheers, darling. Have a good nap."

Ginny fought to stay awake. She really did, but she finally slumped back against the cushions as Pansy and the entire room faded from her vision.


Draco Malfoy shrugged out of his over robe as he entered the flat her shared with Pansy and Blaise. Blaise was right behind him. The two of them figured they had made themselves scarce long enough. Pansy always booted the both of them out, but especially Blaise, whenever she had Luna Lovegood over. This day she'd been having Lovegood and Ginny Weasley for tea. Draco gritted his teeth a bit. Ron Weasley's little sister just got more beautiful every time he saw her. Who knew that freckled little thing who used to follow Potter about like a puppy looking for table scraps would turn out so? Draco found himself staring at her against his will and often lately. Couldn't be helped. She had such a nice shape to her and an absolute mane of red hair. Plus, she was a bit of a firebrand. Hex you sooner than look at you, that one. Especially if your name was Malfoy. He liked it about her though.

It had to be his imagination, but Draco swore the flat felt different because SHE had been in it.

"Pans?" He called.

"They must've gone out after." Blaise offered while looking around suspiciously.

Draco eyed him. While he was sure Blaise knew none of how Draco was about Ginny Weasley, Draco knew every bit of how Blaise Zabini was about Luna Lovegood. The man couldn't have been more obvious in his obsession unless he tattooed it across his brow. Not that Draco really blamed him. She was a fascinating thing these days. Pretty and less goggle-eyed-looking too. She was a bit taller and more willowy than Draco liked a woman to be, but Lovegood's frame fit Blaise's tastes. Not that Pansy ever let Blaise hang about when her new friend was here. She had warned Blaise off specifically because of the way Blaise had treated the Ravenclaw girl in his seventh year at Hogwarts. Draco suspected that was because Blaise was the sort who pulled the pigtails of the girl he fancied. Draco suspected Blaise's little crush went all the way back to their school days.

"I'll be in my room." Blaise snapped, obviously miffed at not getting to indulge a bit more in his little stalkerific hobby.

Draco sighed and made his way to his own bedroom. He'd have to find a book or something to occupy himself. Blaise would be of no company considering the snit he seemed to be in. Draco used his wand to light the lamps in his room. He removed his jumper and tossed it on the bed.

Which moaned.

Draco froze.

The hair on the back of his neck prickled.

Blaise burst into Draco's room. The blonde spun, wand drawn, and nearly took his best friend's head off.

"Bloody hell!" Blaise screeched from where he was crouched. "What's that then?"

"Someone's sleeping in my bed."

"And you were going to hex her for it then? Didn't realize you were so protective of your bed, Malfoy."

"What? She?"

"My guess is it's Weasley."

"How do you figure?"

"Because Lovegood is sprawled out in mine snoring like an ogre and stripped down to her bra, knickers, and very innocently sexy white slip with lace on the edge. I suspect Pans drugged them at tea."

"What for?" Draco snapped.

Blaise gave him an exasperated look. "Your denial of your little Ginny obsession is becoming tiresome, Draco."

Draco blinked at him, trying to hide his surprise. Then he moved to his bed then and whipped back the black down feather duvet. What he saw were deep burgundy lace boy-cut panties on a nicely-shaped bum, long white legs, and a lot of red hair. Blaise walked up next to him. He stared. He blinked, and he stared some more.

Draco moved slowly to Blaise's bedroom. Blaise followed. Sure enough, Luna Lovegood was sprawled out on her back in a navy blue bra and a pristinely white slip. The slip might have hit her mid thigh, but it was nudged up a bit so her navy knickers were showing. Said navy knickers appeared to be holiday-festive. They had little white snowflakes on them. Her blonde hair was spilled all over one of Blaise's pillows. One hand was resting on her bare belly. The other was thrown dramatically over her head. She also appeared to still fancy a necklace made of butterbeer corks. And lastly, she was definitely snoring louder than a muggle buzz saw.

Draco looked at Blaise. "I'll be in my room."

Blaise nodded curtly. He then started undressing.

"What are you doing?" Draco snapped when he noticed this, pausing in his departure.

Blaise smirked at him. "Going to bed."

Draco pointed at him. "You had better not."

Blaise snorted. "I want her awake for that. What sort of a pervert do you take me for?"

Draco lifted one brow.

"But I'd never do THAT to a girl. I don't have to drug one to get one."

"No, apparently Pansy has to drug one for you to get the one you want."

"Pot calling the cauldron black." Blaise snapped. "Isn't there a redhead that Pans put in your bed with her arse cheeks peeking out of her lacy hipster knickers?"

"Shut up." Draco snapped as he stomped back to his room.


He stood at the foot of his bed.

Draco was having what he'd heard called a moral dilemma. He didn't think he'd ever fall victim to one though, having so few morals, yet here he was. He knew with absolute certainty that Blaise was snuggled in his big bed with Luna Lovegood. Draco would love to be in his own bed snuggled up with Ginny Weasley. He just didn't want her hexing the balls off of him tomorrow morning thinking he had done something to her in her drugged state or that he'd had something to do with her drugged state.

He finally sighed rather loudly and decided to hell with it. He was tired, and he was not sleeping on the decorative chaise lounge in his room that used to belong to his mother that was far too short for him just to be a gentleman. Draco stripped, donned his usual sleep attire of some pajama pants, and crawled into his bed. Funny that Pansy still recalled what side he liked to sleep on and had placed Weasley on the other side. Said Weasley murmured something in her sleep when he made sure the blankets were covering her.


Luna felt like that time she'd eaten those funny mushrooms. Her mouth felt all cottony. Her body felt heavy too. What had happened? She tried to open her eyes, but they did not seem ready to function just yet. Luna took stock. The last thing she recalled was having tea with Pans and Gin at Pansy's place.


Luna's eyes flew open, and she tried to sit up. Only she could not. There was a very manly and dark-skinned arm tossed across her middle. Luna followed that arm to the face of its owner. The sleeping face of its owner. She gasped. The gasp wasn't exactly whisper-y. It awoke the owner of the arm.

Blaise Zabini's dark eyes flew open then.

"I didn't touch you. I swear it."

She arched a pale brow and looked down at his arm draped across her.

"Dammit all, you know what I meant."

"What happened to me?" She asked, sounding little and frightened.

Blaise involuntarily pulled her closer and patted her hair in a comforting way. "Pansy drugged you, trussed you up, and stuck in my bed for me to find."

"Why?" She asked. "Why would she do that? I thought she was my friend."

Her voice had cracked a bit. Blaise hugged her tighter. She seemed too stunned to try to escape. He was loving her confusion.

"I thought she liked me. I thought she was my friend." Her voice sounded like she had tears in her eyes.

Blaise gave her a bit of a squeeze then kissed her temple. "She is, dove. She is, but she's my mate too, you know. One of the best. She wants her friends to have what they want even if they don't know they want it."


"She likely figured this was the only way I'd get you into my bed, my being so very Slytherin. Sweet Salazar, the lot of us just don't know how to relate to someone like you. Not ever. I couldn't seem to make myself be normal for you. I'm such a bully and a snob. It's all I know how to be, I think."

Luna leaned back to look at him, suddenly aware that he was holding her quite close and she was only in her undergarments and he seemed to be very nude.

"You like me." She whispered in awe. "You pick on me because you like me."

"Quite a lot."

"You pick on me quite a lot or you like me quite a lot? Because I knew the first part. I was there."


"Oh." Luna considered this. She also did not remove herself from his arms. "So you've been flirting with me all this time? Flirting Slytherin style?"


"Oh." She chewed on her bottom lip. "So you finding me half naked and passed out in your bed was a pleasant surprise?"


She grinned then as a faint blush crept up her face and spread to her neck and even the tops of her breasts. She turned her head away shyly. Blaise moved his head around. He captured her lips with his and turned her head back with them. Luna planted a hand in the center of his bare chest and pushed back.


"What about her?"

"Is she all right?"

"Oh, she ended up in Malfoy's bed and just about as dressed as you are right now."

Luna's eyes went wide. "So I think my question should have been is HE all right?" Then she considered. Her eyebrows went up, and her eyes took on that owlish quality that was not seen as much since she had graduated from Hogwarts. "Draco Malfoy likes Ginny?"

"Quite a lot actually."

"I thought he hated her."

Blaise looked at her. "You also thought I hated you."

"Well put. Excellent point. I still feel perhaps we should pop in on them to make sure no one's been hexed or dead or anything."

"But..." Blaise gestured to himself and the bed and to her.

"You're very sexy. You know that you are. Your kisses are rather nice, but you have to buy me dinner before I'll sleep with you. I know you're not normal, and neither am I, naturally having the nickname Loony and all, but we can at least be that normal. We aren't going about every aspect of this... whatever this is... in a Slytherin manner."

"I was afraid you'd say that."

"Oh you get to win here, I promise. You just have to play the game a bit longer." Luna smiled as she got out of the bed. "And I'd like to have a talk with you that didn't involved insults being hurled at my head. Ravenclaws like compliments."

"The lace on that slip makes me stand at attention."

Her eyes darted to a certain part of the blankets. Sure enough... she grabbed the lace hem of the thing, trying to make the mini-slip longer somehow. "This? Me?"

"Mostly you." He smirked. "How am I doing so far?"

"If you can manage any compliments that did not involve effects on your penis, that'd be great."

"Stop tugging on that slip. There's no point. I've seen your thighs already."

She stilled like a deer who'd caught wind of a wolf.

"You're oddly smart. You don't connect dots in the way others do. You get your conclusions down the road less traveled. It fascinates me."

She forgot to breathe for a moment. "Oh."


"Much." She sighed and turned towards the door. "I hate to leave this room, this moment, but I really do feel I must check on Ginny."

He was one her in an instant, his front molded into her back, his lips on the shell of her ear. "I'll come with you."

Luna could have moaned aloud. My goodness, how had she missed all of THIS? He was THIS about HER?

"Why do you make that sound decidedly less innocent than it ought to be?" She managed to ask.

"Because I am me."

Luna smiled and pulled the door open. That he was, and unexpectedly, he was also about her apparently.


Draco was lying very still. If he had not had to breathe, he suspected he would not be moving at all. Ginny Weasley was using his bare chest as a pillow. Her red hair was spilled all over him. It was a fascinating contrast to his pale flesh. He was not sure how long he'd been like this, but he could not remain so for much longer. He really had never been one for patience.

She made a very feminine little noise that definitely hit him below the belt and stirred a bit. He felt her eyelashes flutter against his skin. Draco braced for impact as he bit back a moan. She stiffened, finally realizing she was not in the bed alone, and sat herself up. Draco held his breath as she turned to see who she had been lying on.

Her eyes went impossibly wide.

"Good morning, Weasley." He said in an overly cheery tone. "Sleep well?"

She reached for the wand that was not on her and noticed she was in her underwear. Draco noticed that her bra was the same shade of burgundy as her knickers. Ginny squealed loudly and backpedalled herself right out of the bed. She went legs over head landed hard on the floor with a very loud thud and a groan of pain.


Draco scrambled to the edge she'd tumbled over. Only to see a small dainty fist right before it connected with his eye. Draco fell back on the bed with a howl of indignant pain, grabbing his injured eye socket. She was on him a moment later, straddling his middle and slapping at his head. Draco had to throw up his arms in an attempt to protect himself.

"Bloody effing hell! Stop that! Dammit!"

Draco started grappling with her for the upper hand. A few minutes later, he had her pinned to the bed and was looking decidedly rumpled. Well, they both were, but seeing her under him with her hair all askew with her nostrils flaring was quite the picture. Quite the affecting picture.

"You unbelievable bastard." She hissed through her teeth.

"I can't help it!" He shouted. "You're all seminude, and we've had a bit of a wrassle."

"What?" Then it dawned on her what exactly he was referring to. She could feel it. "Oh! Not that! Last night! How DARE you!"

"How dare I what? Sleep in my own bed and not touch you?"

"You had Pansy drug us. My goddess, where's Luna? What have you done with her!"

"Not a blessed thing."

"I don't believe you."

"Lovegood was placed in Zabini's bed. I didn't touch a blonde hair on her head."

Ginny let out a growl of anger and started struggling under him.

"Stop that." Draco hissed as he rested his forehead against hers and tried to control himself.

Ginny's eyes had gone very wide. Likely because she had noticed the struggling had made her effect on him more... prevalent. She shifted slightly under his weight, looking a bit uncomfortable and embarrassed.

"Dammit all, will you stop wriggling about!"

"Didn't realize you were so sensitive."

"I'm not."

"You aren't... I mean... th-that is to say... y-y-you don't..." She was suddenly stuttering and a bright blush crept up her cheeks.

"I don't what?" He asked, looking very severe.

"You want me? I mean, you can't want me. You don't... do you?"

"I thought that had been rather firmly established here." He quipped as he shifted slightly, letting her feel more of him.

She let out this breathy little sigh that did not sound like anything but pleasure.

Draco felt a bit of hope at that. "Why else would Pansy do this? She knew I'd never go after you on my own."

"Why not? You're fearless."

Surprising. "I would have thought you'd say spineless."

"Back at Hogwarts perhaps, but not now. No, I don't suppose I'd say that now."

"And what do you suppose you'd say if I were to ask if I could kiss you?"

Her eyes went wide again. "I... I..."

"Nevermind." Draco attempted to remove himself from on top of her person.

He'd been a thousand times a fool to think she'd ever accept anything of him. Even if she did find him fearless and apparently not so repulsive. Needless to say he was suitably stunned when she grabbed his head and planted her lips on his own.

After several, several minutes of this and after Ginny had somehow managed to roll them so that she was on top, Draco heard the door creak open. He opened one eye to see Lovegood standing there still very much only in her under-things and Blaise standing next to her without a stitch on. Draco flipped them both the bird before waving them both out of the room then threading his hand up in the back of Ginny's red hair.

"See? No one dead or hexed. Though it appears lack of oxygen may become an issue." Blaise said before pulling Lovegood out and closing the door.

Ginny pushed back with her palms on Draco's chest, breathing heavily and turned to look at the door. "What... I thought I heard..."

"Just Lovegood and Zabini come to make certain no one was dead or hexed." Draco said dryly.

"This is crazy." Ginny whispered, stating the obvious.

"Isn't it?" He smirked.

"I thought you hated me."

"Maybe once, but it wasn't really you I hated, Gin. It was your family, and by Merlin, it wasn't even my hate. It was my father's. I'm happy to report I'm not quite so stupid any longer. It was never you. Well, not that way. In another way, I think it might have always been you."

"But the way you speak to me sometimes..."

"What can I say..." He said in a husky tone as he tugged on a lock of her hair. "I'm a bit of a pigtail-puller. Most Slytherins are."

"Ron's going to have a fit about this."

"Bonus." He whispered before pulling her mouth back down to his. She halted their connection. Draco arched a pale brow at her. "Changed your mind already then?"

"Oh no." She seemed to struggle a bit within. "It's just..."


"Well, you're so not who I always thought you were anymore. It's a bit..."



"Naturally. How do you think I felt when I realized that a good, sound hexing was not exactly what I wanted to do to you?"

She giggled. "I just think..."

"And I think you're thinking far too much right now. We'll sort it all out later. I waited too long to kiss you to wait much longer. Let's you and I fall all over one another and see how we land, ay?"

"And Draco Malfoy always gets what he wants."

"So it would seem." He smirked again. "So it would definitely seem."



The End

You have reached the end of "Girl with a Plan". This story is complete.

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking