One of these days, Alice... straight to the moon!
There will be no original characters, therefore, every character belongs to someone who isn't me. Buffyverse belongs to Joss and company, Stargate belongs to those Stargate guys. If you'd like to know who exactly, you should look it up. I'm sure Google would love to tell you.
There will be a Willow/Daniel pairing eventually, just, not yet. So sit tight.
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Ok, this did not look like someplace safe. Why did all her spells seem to go so wrong lately? If the latest mojo number had worked correctly, she would have found herself some place safe—someplace like Buffy's house or even her parent's old place. This bore no resemblance to either of those locales, nor to any house she had been in before. She was pretty distinctly behind bars. And while she had heard that some people turned themselves in to be safe on the “inside”, she was pretty sure that the spell wouldn't have sent her to jail
to avoid a demon, no matter how big and scary it was.
She was interrupted from her internal flash-babble by someone being very loud right next to her.
“What the... who the... how the hell did you do that?!” Gruff, manly, loud, angry: best to answer the fragments of questions as best she could.
“You're probably not used to people just appearing out of nowhere, huh? Well, ok, so I'm not to familiar with it either, but the yelling isn't going to help, as far as I can tell. Ok, so with the who- my name is Willow. And how I got here... would you believe me if I said I didn't know, exactly?”
“You don't know... Teal'c, can you tell from Junior if she's sportin' the latest in snake-wear?”
A very large man with a gold oval-and-squiggle on his forehead spoke from directly on her other side, “She is not a Goa'uld, nor does she have any visible Goa'uld technology, O'Neill.”
“Great, a mystery redhead.” The man called O'Neill sighed in a very put-out way, “Bet Daniel and Carter would love a go at this one. Too bad we're the ones locked up with puzzle-girl and they're the ones who have to focus on a way to break us out. Any neat vanishing tricks for three people by any chance?”
“Look, I already said I don't know how I got here. I was just trying to go someplace safe and then-”
“You were trying to go someplace safe and ended up in snake prison? You either have an extremely skewed idea of safe or you're extremely unlucky.”
“Both are probably true.” Willow sighed. “But I definitely didn't mean to end up in snake prison. Wait, snake prison? Why are you calling it snake prison? If you tell me that this place is going to fill up with snakes like in Indiana Jones, be prepared for some serious freaking out.”
'Indiana Jones... this is an Earth girl? Aw hell, now I really
don't know what's going on.' Thought Jack. 'Did she come through the Russian 'Gate? She must have... Hammond wouldn't just send someone through who had no idea what was going on. But she sounds American... and just appearing in the cell...'
“Damn it, I really need Carter right about now.” Jack muttered.
Ask and ye shall receive, apparently, because moments later Major Samantha Carter and Doctor Daniel Jackson were outside the cell, furiously working at the high-tech locking mechanism.
“Jack! Teal'c!” the linguist gasped between great breaths. It seemed that there had been some recent running. And sure enough: “We've got to get moving, some of the guards will probably have seen through our little diversion already and will be on their way... uh hello.” Daniel turned to Jack. “Who's the girl?”
“This is Willow. She likes Indiana Jones but not the parts with snakes.” Jack intoned, hoping he was being subtle in front of their guest, but not too much so for Daniel and Carter.
Daniel's eyebrows furrowed and then rose high on his forehead as the significance of Jack's statement became clear. Willow was from Earth, or at least familiar with it's recent popular culture. And she was blatantly civilian. And she was here, on PX-whatever. Well either he would get a fun puzzle: Earth's modern culture spreading through the stars like it's ancient mythology had; or Sam would get a puzzle: an Earth girl finding her way onto a distant planet, and not through the Stargate, as far as he knew. As a civilian, getting into Cheyenne Mountain was sometimes difficult even for him, and he worked there. It would be shocking in the extreme for someone to wander in, wander down two elevators and then just wander into an active Stargate. As far as he knew, also, the Russians kept theirs under just as much guard as his employers did. If this Willow was from Earth, she was either feigning ignorance, or a great scientific confusion. Teal'c would know if she was lying though, and while Daniel couldn't claim to know much about what the Jaffa was thinking, he didn't seem to be particularly perturbed by the little red headed girl. But for now, danger was coming and mysteries would have to wait. For a little while at least.
While running, towards what she didn't know, Willow thought about her accidental companions. They were certainly curious about her, though that was comforting in a way. If they had known exactly what was going on with her, that would be cause for suspicion and fear on her part. Then again, the suspicion and fear were already setting up shop, due to the fact that these guys were clearly military. She was just glad they weren't of the “immediately shoot anything we don't understand” persuasion.
Noises behind her brought her out of her reverie. There were things behind her, things with human bodies but giant snake heads 'oh, snakes'. On second glance they might have been big clunky helmets, but whatever the things behind her were, they were shooting at the running party of five. Shooting lasers out of those staff things they all had. Just to be clear, she turned to O'Neill: “Those would be the badguys, correct?”
Rolling one's eyes and running was dangerous, but Jack, of course, pulled it off. “Yes, those are the badguys.”
Willow turned and planted her feet, half levitating, half pushing all the snake-faces into walls, floors, and other nearby hard objects, hoping that their possible helmets wouldn't protect them from being knocked out. There were only so many times a girl could be chased for one day, after all. And she'd really like some more information on these military guys before she followed them blindly to wherever. She also wanted to know why forehead-squiggle guy had a staff like the bad guys, and she wanted to find out what branch of the armed services agreed with her opinion that floppy hair and glasses was a good look for serving the country.
Fortunately for all involved, with the exception of the snake-faces, said snake men were sprawled unconscious in the hallway, alleviating the immediacy of the threat. Now the earth bunch could make their way more casually than before, taking more care not to run headfirst into any traps. Quiet talk was also permitted; and after introductions complete with ranks, questions and answers, soft if a bit frantic, floated back and forth between SG-1 and the lone representative of the supernatural community.
Though national security and a lingering mistrust for the military held back a good deal of information, what was revealed between the two parties was enough to grant wonder and confusion to all. Willow was in space? Not on Earth? How could one stupid spell go so ridiculously wrong?
SG-1 meanwhile was surprised by Willow's surprise. It was plain by her lack of recognition when they described it that she had never seen or heard of the Stargate. How could someone get to outer space by accident? Or appear from nowhere into a Goa'uld cell, practically in the laps of an Air Force Colonel and the former First Prime of Apophis? Plus, apart from the fact that the appearing-from-nowhere-into-space didn't phase her nearly as much as it should have, she seemed like a normal California girl, if a bit nervous and a little geeky.
“So, what happens now? We sneak through enemy territory to some big stone circle--aptly named 'The Stargate'--punch our home address into yet another stone circle, and zing through space back to Earth and into your sanctum sanctorum?”
Daniel had an inexplicably elated look on his face. “Sanctum sanctorum? I love that phrase! I never get to hear that with the military, it's all 'HQ' this and 'base' that. Never any nice Latin. Sanctum sanctorum... from the Greek 'to hagion ton hagion' from the Hebrew 'qōdeš haqqodāšîm' or 'hol-”
“I think we can leave it there with the vocab lesson, Daniel.” Jack was sure that this situation with the girl was going to give him enough headaches without Daniel being all Daniel-y. He was hoping to get the girl through the Stargate, where plenty of nice servicemen with guns would watch and make sure she doesn't try to kill anybody, and let Carter and Hammond interrogate her. He was planning on going to that happy place where he thought about his next fishing trip until they were done with her.
“That is the plan, Willow.” Said Carter, taking her turn as the voice of reason. “With any luck you'll be meeting General Hammond shortly and we can figure out what's going on.”
“Oh,” sighed Willow, “so I should just get used to being around here and in the dark then...”
“No luck, huh?” Asked Daniel in a gentle, joking voice.
“Finding myself on the other side of the Galaxy with no clear notion of how I got there kinda leaves me feeling a little luckless.”
“I suppose that would do it.” Daniel mused, eyes lingering on the redhead for a few moments before they went back to guiding his feet, preventing another accident that would be so typically “Daniel”.
They made it back to the 'Gate without much trouble, dealing with the token resistance of a few angry aliens along the way. After dialing home and confirming that the wormhole was stable and that the iris was indeed open on the other side, the travelers made their way back to good old Earth. Teal'c and Jack had to pull a hesitant Willow through, but in the end they found themselves safe and sound inside the SGC.