Hello all, I thank you for reading and reviewing this is the end. Hope you guys liked it as much as I liked writing it. There will be another featuring Willow who we all adore (Hopefully) It's posted already, my new baby Only Willow's Bend.
The sun was warm against my face, soothing. It felt good just to lay here and not move just Anita and me.
“I wasn’t scared this time, “I told her softly, “I mean it hurt but I didn’t fight it…I don’t remember all of the like pain and stuff I think maybe I blacked out.” I shrugged turning my head to look at her. Her hair was down trialing over her shoulders. She called in sick today, Micah did too. He was inside making lemonade.
“My Slayer side was inside me and the leopard too…And then I don’t know the Slayer side was just gone and I shifted. Will is always hurt?” I asked hesitantly.
“No, you’ll get used to the change…”
“I thought Willow said that they’d end up fighting” the animator replied picking at the grass.
“Well, maybe she was wrong…It probably would have killed me.” I smiled, “I don’t really want to die so I guess this isn’t so bad.”
“How do you feel?” she asked seriously. I shrugged looking down at my hands.
“I don’t know, it hasn’t sunk in yet but we knew me shifting was a possibility right? I mean Micah and Nathaniel are both shifters and they cool people, I know it isn’t going to change who I am.”
“But you won’t be like normal kids anymore.” She replied softly, I gave her a look.
“I was never like normal kids Anita, none of us were and we never will be.”
Anita squinted at me, I continued, “But I guess it wouldn’t be so bad, it’s not like I was attacked it’s just the way my body changed to this dimension. Maybe Willow and Delia are going to have some similar reactions.”
“But why?” she asked, “I don’t understand why it happened…”
I turned onto my stomach, my hair trailing into my face, I smoothed it out of my eyes with practiced ease, “I don’t know either…Maybe the Powers that Be decided to take away my Slayer side who knows, but it’s gone…Like gone, gone, not
hiding.” I picked up a cookie from the plate in front of us and took a big bite, Micah made the best cookies next to Nathaniel. I think maybe even Nathaniel would win over Martha Stewart in home stuff.
“What does my leopard form look like?” I asked curiously, Anita looked surprised by the question.
“You’ve never seen a shifter before?”
I shook my head, “Well I seen the other worlds shifters they were more animal then anything, but I’ve never seen a leopard before. When Micah took my best I passed out like right after.”
“Well,” she stole the remainder of my cookie right out my hand and shoved it in her mouth. I gaped.
She laughed; grumbling I took another cookie but I was smiling too so it was
“So what did I look like?” I asked again.
“You were big,” she started, “But all were leopards are, full grown they’re maybe the size of a small pony. You were half that…” she shrugged, “I don’t know what to say Faith, and I was so in shock I didn’t get a chance to study you. I know your eyes turn grey.”
I remembered the grey eyes girl from my dream maybe that was my leopard peeking out, “I’m sorry I hit Richard.”
Anita snorted, “He did kind of deserve it.”
I smiled, “He did.” My smile faded some, “How do you feel about me shifting?”
She looked surprise, “I guess it’s one of those things that makes you even more special, at least now I won’t have to worry about you getting sick and hurting yourself really badly.” We both smiled.
“Why was there paint on your shoe?” she asked suddenly.
“Last night there was paint on your shoe.”
“Well, remember Aubrey the vampire?”
“Yea…” she started suspiciously, I picked at the grass.
“Well, I was going to draw and she was with me and I found out she really likes to paint so we went back to her room and she showed me all her paintings.” I replied in a rush.
“You went off with a vampire by yourself?” Anita asked in a blank tone. I gave her wide eyes.
“I was perfectly safe Anita! Aubrey is so totally cool and she has the prettiest paintings ever like they are so amazing! She let me use her paints to paint a picture!”
“I didn’t know you liked to paint,” she replied with a frown.
“Dr. Marlowe told me to try it, that maybe it would help me express myself and clear my thoughts…”
“Did it?” she asked, I shrugged.
“I didn’t finish it…But I started one and I think maybe it helped a little. I’ll be right back.”
Standing I took off before she could say anything almost running over Micah carrying out some lemonade.
I retrieved the drawing I did from under the bed and raced back down stairs.
Micah was sitting behind Anita when I reappeared with the folded piece of paper tucked inside the white pocket of my dress.
“I drew a picture a couple days ago about a dream I had. It isn’t very good but…well…I don’t know.”
I handed her the paper before I could back out, she gave her glass to Micah and opened it carefully.
Biting my lip I stood there while they both viewed it.
“I-I smudged it a little and I mean I don’t except to be all fantastic or anything-“
“Faith,” Anita cut in, I snapped my mouth shut, “This is really good.”
My eyes widened, Micah was nodding, “This is amazing, why didn’t you tell us you could draw?!”
I shrugged self consciously, “Because I didn’t know I could.”
She smiled at me, pulled me into her arms and kissed my forehead.We spent all afternoon outside in the sun until it was time to go pick up Delia and
Willow still thought being a vampire would be cooler then being a shifter but I didn’t agree with her. Delia wanted me to change for them but Anita wouldn’t let me. She said I’d make a mess in the house. Micah was teaching me what it was to be a leopard. My first full moon was coming up. He said as it got closer I’d feel my beast more and stuff. Sometimes when I’m angry Willow says my smell changes, I asked her what it smelled like and she said boogers. But boogers don’t have a smell so I know she’s lying. Anita framed my picture and took it to work. She said
so she could have something to put on her desk. Nathaniel also gave her a picture of me Delia and Willow when we were sleeping. Personally I think Delia ruined the whole picture cause she was like totally hogging the lens but Anita loves it so I guess it was okay.
Aubrey let me finish the painting it took three days without any breaks except for lunch and sleep to get it finished but those were the only breaks.
I didn’t let her see it when I was finished, instead after it dried I wrapped it and Anita and I took it to my next meeting with Dr. Marlowe.
When he saw it I think he actually teared up a little, I hadn’t expected that. He said I had a real gift and I should keep on trying to get better. I guess he wasn’t so bad, sometimes we had our days where I couldn’t get anything out but it was
getting better. He thought maybe if I sat down and talked to Richard it would help me find ‘inner peace’. I told him what he could do with his inner peace, I didn’t like Richard. Maybe one day when I’m older I’d talk to him, but right now in this moment I wanted to ignore his tortured ass.
Or BUTT Anita didn’t like us to say bad words anymore, ever since that lady heard us at the mall and muttered to her hubby how rude we were. It took me a week to muster up the courage to let Anita and Micah and the rest see my painting.
It was a riot of color, dark red and navy blues all mixed up and changing. It’s what the inside of my head looked like at the time of the rape. I wasn’t so ashamed of it anymore, I knew what happened wasn’t my fault and I did win just by not dying. I put my soul into the painting, all the insecurities that I had been
hiding and the anger and the sadness. Sometimes I’d trace the curve of a broken body barely identifiable between the colors. I had been the broken body, the lost soul. But Anita found me and she made me whole again. I still go see Dr. Marlowe
once a week, I still paint. JC bought me canvases and a stand complete with water colors and charcoal pencils for home. Aubrey was teaching me how to be better, create smoother lines and really see the world. I really liked Aubrey I could talk to
her how ever I wanted, even curse words.
We’re starting school, I didn’t want to go back and it sucked but I guess we had to. Willow’s so excite she has trouble sleeping. Such a weirdo, but I love her.
Sometimes I dream of the mean that hurt me, I dream of pain that won’t let me go. On those days I wake up to find myself surrounded by the warmth of Anita and Micah. Or sometimes I tell Jean-Claude and he’ll sit and listen and let me talk
until I didn’t want to talk anymore. Sometimes I get so frustrated I spare with the tree in the backyard, usually when that happens Anita has to call Doc Lillian. My knee got better when I shifted the first time but it isn’t healed no matter what I do my body wouldn’t be able to heal the nerve damage. I can walk okay and it doesn’t hurt but when I over do it, I limp and my knee pops but only if I over due it.
Sometimes I dream of fields of lavender flowers, but it’s no longer with a sad lost girl. She’s happy and knows exactly where she’s going and it’s exactly where I want to be.
With the people who love you.