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A/N: [crosses fingers and hopes the boys are true to character]
Creepy ass forest? Check.
Ritual sacrifice? Check.
Plan to stop said sacrifice? You bet your skinny ass.
Murphy taking a look at the plan and laughing his ass off before screwing you over? Sounds about right.
Just as they were untying the unfortunate “virgin” (a sobbing teenage boy that screamed “geek”. Figuratively, of course.) Murphy grabbed them by the balls and squeezed. Hard
Just above the sacrificial altar (plastic table covered by a cheap throw. Amateurs.), a swirly green, dare he call it a portal?, thing began to form.
It flashed brightly enough to blind him before disappearing.
He aimed his shotgun in tandem with Sam.
“What the hell? Demon? Hellbeast?” he questioned.
“No. Pissed off guy with an axe. Who’s going to murder Andrew in a painfully embarrassing way,” the man groaned as he stood.
No friggin’ way.
“Xander?!” Did he just say that out loud?
“How do you know me?” that got the guy’s attention, “You didn’t summon me did you? Of course not. Why would you summon me
? Unless…I hope you didn’t because Willow is soo going to open a can of Bad-Ass Wicca if you did. And why are you pointing threatening weaponry at me? That’s kinda of rude considering that you
.” Dean blinked. Geez the man could babble.
“Dean? You know this guy?” Sam questioned with a good amount of disbelief.
“When’s the last time you watched Buffy?” Dean shot back.
“Buffy?! You guys are stalking Buffy
? Are you insane
? Or do you happen to have a morbid death wish? Geez if you want her positive attention you buy her weapons. You don’t
kidnap her friend! Wait…Spike kidnapped me and Willow…you guys aren’t vampires are you? No, dressed like actual people and not broody Dracula-wannabe’s. Stupid Deadboy.”
And he was off.
Dean had a feeling this was only the beginning. Of the day and his headache.
Why couldn’t it have been Buffy? Blonde, hot, ass-kicker. Why oh why was it the babbling sidekick who reminded him of Sam at his most annoying?
Murphy must really have it out for him.