Buffy and Firefly characters belong to Joss Whedon.
This isn't happening, Dawn thought as she hid inside her room. The problem was, it was happening. She was still Dawn Summers, but now she had a new set of memories. Memories of being Dawn Tam, River Tam's twin sister. And only she and River knew that Dawn Tam was a lie.
She reached into her long sleeved and touched her chest. The claw marks she got in the fight were still bleeding slightly. "Liou coe shway duh biao-tze huh hoe-tze duh ur-tze," she cursed. She must still be the key. She was bleeding when the spell hit her, and the key was somehow activated to create a whole new mess. She reached under her mattress and pulled out a butcher's knife. She had hidden one there about a month ago. She wasn't sure what had made her do it, but she did know she felt slightly better knowing it was there.
She rolled up her sleeves and put the blade to her wrist. She had to find out if she was still the key. She just had to.
Simon set the sedated River down in her bed. He hadn't wanted to sedate her, but she had shown no signs of calming down. He stroked her hair and then left. He had to go find Dawn.
He was really worried about Dawn. She had always had a wild imagination, but ever since the Academy she had become convinced that her fantasy world was the real one. And despite everything he did, she still wasn't convinced that she was where she belonged.
He opened the door to Dawn's room. His jaw dropped open at the sight in front of him. Dawn was collapsed on the floor, her wrist slashed and bleeding, the knife still clutched loosely in her hands. "Wuh de tyen, ah," he cried out.
She opened her eyes and looked up at him. "Simon?" she said quietly.
He rushed to her side. He grabbed the blanket off her bed and put it on her wrist. "Mei-Mei, what did you do?" he asked as he applied pressure. "Why did you do this?"
"I had to see if I was still the key," she said quietly. She looked down at her wrist. "I wasn't Dawn Tam before. First I was a green ball of energy. Then the monks made me into Dawn Summers, and gave me to Buffy. They put fourteen years of fake memories in my head. But they felt real."
Simon picked her up and started carrying her to the infirmary. He didn't have time to try to figure out what she was saying.
"I don't understand why I'm here," she said. "I died to save Buffy, just like she did for me. I'm supposed to be dead. But I woke up here. I woke up as Dawn Tam and seventeen more years of fake memories." She started to cry. "I don't want to be here. I don't want to be a weapon. I don't want to be a government experiment gone wrong." She started getting more upset. "Two by two hands of blue. Two by two, hands of blue. They want their key back. They won't stop till they get it back."
He set her down on the infirmary bed. "Dawnie, listen to me," he said quietly. He placed both hands on her cheek and gently made her look at him. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you. I promise."
She calmed down a little, but the look in her eyes told him she didn't believe him. He sighed and got to work on her wrist. He tried to ignore the helpless feeling inside of him. He couldn't understand why his little sisters couldn't have been left alone. River and Dawn had never done anything to hurt anybody. They were just kids. All they wanted was to be kids.
"Hi Kaylee," Dawn said. She used her free hand to wave at the doorway.
"Hey Dawnie," Kaylee said. She came in and stood at Dawn's other side. "What happened?"
"She had a little accident," he explained. He gave Kaylee a reassuring smile. "But she'll be fine."
Dawn nodded. "Yeah. I'll be fucked up, insecure, neurotic and emotional again in no time."
Kaylee frowned. "I don't think he meant that kind of fine. I think he meant you'll be the shiny kind of fine." She paused and looked at him. "That is what you meant, right?"
He nodded. "Yes, that is what I meant."
Dawn shrugged. "Oh. Well, I think I can do that. Somebody around here has to torment the girly man."