Disclaimer: I own not the world of Harry Potter or of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Fiascos in Supernatural Dating
Ron Weasely & Dawn Summers
He was totally blaming the twins for this latest disaster. The three Weasley boys had stopped at a kiosk at King’s Cross after seeing Ginny off on Hogwart’s Express to start her new job as assistant to Madame Pomfrey when they saw three very pretty muggles pass by. The tall dark haired one dressed in leather had leered at the three red heads and nudged her companions. The tiny blond woman rolled her eyes grabbed the woman in leather by the elbow and dragged her off giving some last minute instructions to the third woman who just smiled and waved at the departing women. That was when the twins struck.
“A pretty girl like that shouldn’t be left all alone,” George said.
“No, definitely not,” Fred continued.
“Looks a little lost and lonely,” George commented as they watched the girl look around curiously. When she caught the boy’s eyes, she blushed and looked away.
“I would have to agree with you, Gred.”
Ron rolled his eyes. When the twins started talking as Gred and Forge, he knew they were up to something. He paid for some muggle treats that he knew his father would enjoy and started to move away when he heard George say, “Ronald, a proposition.”
“I say, it’s well known you know the most about muggles,” Fred said eyes twinkling.
“More than Father, even,” George nodded enthusiastically.
“I mean, your two best mates are muggle-born,” Fred intoned wisely.
“You spent all that time with Hermione’s teeth obsessed parents and all,” George shook his head still a little baffled by teeth being replaced with metal rods getting stuck in one’s head.
“You’d be the best to save her from her lonely plight.”
Ron looked back and forth from one twin to the other. “How do you know she’s lonely? A plight?”
“Looks like he’s not buying it, George,” Fred said with a sad look.
“Time to pull out the big guns, then,” George replied.
“We dare you to ask her out on a date.” Ron groaned. It was like some genetic switch going off. Weasleys never backed down from a dare.
That had been about five hours ago.
He had boldly walked up to her extended a hand, “Ronald Weasley.”
“The direct method, good approach,” she said taking the extended hand, “Dawn Summers, I seem to be turned around.” He set her straight on the train lines through London, accompanied her back to her hotel and asked her out for dinner. She had graciously agreed.
Three hours ago, he had arrived on her doorstep and walked to a nearby restaurant that Hermione had found by casting some net. He wasn’t too sure how that worked, but after the last time he had tried to use her electric box thing and caused a “System Failure, Press escape to reboot,” Hermione had threatened to hex him if he ever touched it again.
Dinner was pleasant. She was funny for a yank and she was fascinated about growing up in a family of boys. She had moaned and groaned about being surrounded mostly by overprotective women and stuffy men that acted like they were her father. She laughed at his highly censored stories of his time at Hogwarts. He talked about muggle dentistry; he had absorbed enough from hanging about Hermione and her teeth obsessed parents over the years that he knew he would probably sound very muggle when talking about bridges, titanium posts and different shades of porcelain. He figured that was much safer than talking about his father’s collection of muggle plugs and batteries, although that might have been more interesting.
One hour ago, they had left the pub and were walking back to her hotel when three grengrills, or at least Ron thought they were grengrills, had approached them and after a spectacular muggle fight, of which Ron had been very little help, but it seemed his date had all sorts of training in kicking and punching, they had been taken captive. But not before Ron had managed to set of the coin that he always carried. On of the original coins that Hermione had charmed back in fifth year. A few of them still had them, he, Harry, Hermione, Ginny, Neville and Luna. He knew any minute, Harry or Hermione, or someone, most likely all of them would apparate in to perform a rescue and obliviate his date. Only, they hadn’t.
So here they were stuck in a small room with almost no light, except what came in through the barred window in the door. Ron tilted his head back a few times, knocking it against the wall with a dull ‘thunk, thunk, thunk.’ In his right hand, he kept keying the coin. He hadn’t dared pull out his wand in front of Dawn. She was a muggle and the ministry had been absolutely cracking down on the whole magic about muggle thing, especially after the whole muggle Watcher’s Council incident that the ministry was trying to sort out.
In fact, if he remembered right, Hermione and Harry were at some meeting with some group about that. Ministry, Ron snorted a bit. He was much happier managing the twin’s Hogsmeade store.
His date was pacing. She had been pacing since they had been thrown in the cell about half and hour earlier. Occasionally she would mutter something inane and kick a wall. It seemed she was winding down as her pacing had slowed and finally, she plopped her body down beside his. “If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be?” she asked with a wan smile.
Ron raised an eyebrow, “Not here?”
“I’m sorry about this. I don’t know how those faryls found me this time. It’s not even my time of the month.”
Ron recoiled, that was a little too much information. He always shied away from any talk about the whole female cycle thing, despite Hermione being one of his best friends and his close relationship with Ginny. He was not ashamed to admit that during “that time of the month” he would duck and cover and make himself scarce, in a manly sort of way, of course.
Dawn laughed at his expression, “No, not that, the time of the month for my kidnapping. It’s early. Usually I’m taken around the new moon or full moon. Mid-cycle, not too often.”
Ron’s eyebrows winged up. “So kidnapping by faryls, you called them? Faryls. I could have sworn they were grengrills. Don’t know faryls.”
“Grengrills?” Dawn shot her companion an odd look. She was right, he seemed to calm about the whole kidnapping thing. Probably got a screw loose. Damn and he seemed so normal at dinner. Not that being second to the youngest of seven was exactly normal, but he seemed to have a nice normal family and good friends and funny stories from the boarding school he attended. Although he looked at Dawn oddly when she asked if he was in dental school, he was very knowledgeable about the subject. Now he was muttering about moons and books and Dawn sighed at another date gone bad. Faith was going to laugh and Buffy would say “I told you so.”
Dawn jumped up startled and looked around wildly and started backing away as Ron stood with an unholy grin on his face, “Yes, finally,” he pulled out of his pocket what seemed to be a roaring coin. “’Bout time you buggers got back to me!”
Suddenly, there were sounds of shouting from upstairs and a female voice shouting pithy comments and another voice yelling for Dawn. “Down here!” She moved to the front of the cage, “What the heck took you so long?!”
“Forty two minutes is not long!” the blond woman that Ron had seen her with earlier ran in front of the cage with a large stick in her hand chasing one of the faryl things.
“Ronald?” Hermione’s voice could be heard.
Suddenly a flash of light hit the door and it sprung open. A female bundle of bushy hair flew in and jumped on him obscuring his sight before pulling back and Ron cringed a bit at the familiar batting about his head that signified a highly irritated Hermione.
“Back off, sister,” came the very annoyed voice of his date and the buffeting stopped. He was treated to the sight of Hermione’s wand arm grabbed and held by Dawn with a cold look on his face. The expression much like he saw in her earlier fight with the faryls.
“Woah, no, Dawn, Hermione,” Ron did not know who looked scarier now, his date of his best friend. Before further fireworks could explode, Ron stepped in between them, “Dawn Summers, Hermione Granger. Dawn, she’s my friend from school I was telling you about. Hermione, Dawn. She and I were at dinner when the faryl things attacked us.”
Hermione narrowed her eyes at Dawn and then looked at Ron, “Those aren’t faryls, where did you get that? It seems like these grengrills are owned by some hold out DE that’s bent on revenge on you, me and Harry.”
“Hah!” Ron said turning to Dawn, “Not faryls!”
“What?” Dawn was truly shocked, “This wasn’t about me?”
“Not everything in the world is about you, Dawn.” It seemed that Buffy had dispatched her grengrill and she now stood in the doorway with a huge grin on her face, “If I’ve told you once-.”
“Don’t you start, Buffy,” Dawn said releasing Hermione and pointing a finger at her sister, “when was the last time a kidnapping wasn’t about me?”
Buffy rolled her eyes. “Hey, mate,” a new voice was heard and those standing the in the little cell turned to see Harry Potter walking down the stairs with the dark haired woman from the train station.
“Situation?” Buffy asked.
“Five by five,” Faith replied with a grin, “Hey, D,” she turned back to Buffy, “I called Giles and told him that he could call off the researchers. I told you it was too early for a Dawn kidnapping end of the world apocalypse stopping party.” Buffy flapped her hand at Faith dismissively. A loud crash and bang could be heard. Everyone looked up.
“What’s going on up there?” Dawn asked a little concerned.
“Some funny blond is taking pictures and has got this feather thing and some red-head is yelling at some blond guy about something or the other,” Faith just shrugged. “Then they started kissing and the blond girl took some pictures of that while the grengy thing made a break for it. Then the Neville bloke tacked it and they were having some roll around on the floor, the blond and the red-head, not Neville and the grengy. It was funny but then this one,” she indicated Harry, “Started yelling about going blind and getting Ron, so we came down here.”
“THE FERRET’S KISSING MY SISTER?!” Ron ran out of the room and bolted up the stairs.
Dawn shook her head and dropped in into her hands. She really didn’t want to know. She really didn’t. She was never going to hear the end of this and she was never going to go on a date again.
“Er, hi, we haven’t been introduced. I’m Harry Potter.”
Dawn looked up and brilliant green eyes met hers. Dawn blinked, felt her heart flutter, gave a weak grin and took the extended hand, “Direct, good approach, I’m Dawn Summers.”