Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters. I receive no profits from this. It is just for fun.
Archiving: Please ask.
Feedback: Constructive Criticism desired.
AN – I have labeled this one as a single shot because my muse did not see where to take this beyond the set up. I am not sure of how many of my generation are into Buffy and LSH but I hope some of you at least understand what’s the what.
AN – I know I don’t have the dialog exact from the show but, it’s close enough for this fic.
AN – Thoughts are placed between two asterisks.
Snyder was looking happy when the Scoobs saw him upon entering school that morning. They knew that spelled TROUBLE. Anything that made Snyder happy was bound to make most of the student body unhappy, especially one Buffy Summers. They couldn’t go in the other direction because he standing right beside their lockers and they needed to get books for their first period classes.
Trying to blend into the background while he appeared to be involved with something with Cordelia and her sheep, they warily approached his blindside.
“Thank you for volunteering,” said Snyder swarmily.
“It’s our pleasure,” replied Cordelia, not even trying to make it sound convincing.
“What’s the what?” whispered Buffy to Xander and Willow.
“Halloween escort duty for the younger crowd. Volunteer and get your own group of sugary-hyped monsters,” replied Xander, also whispering. “Note the interesting take Snyder has on ‘volunteering’.”
“Alright, Miss Chase, your turn to pick a costume,” said Snyder holding up a small fish bowl with slips of folded paper in it.
Cordelia looked around glumly since she had already heard what the rest of her sheep picked and just knew who ever drew up the list of costumes was so far out of touch, the Hubble couldn’t find him even if it did have perfect vision. Reluctantly she reached into the bowl, grabbed a slip of paper, opened and read it.
“Who????” she said wonderingly.
Snyder took the paper from her and read it.
“Ah, a classic,” Snyder smiled.
“But…but…It says there have to be three of us,” looking at her sheep, “and they’ve already picked!”
“Not to worry, my dear. That’s easily rectified.”
At which point Snyder turned around and placed his hands on Willow’s and Buffy’s shoulders. The girls stiffening, not only from being touched by the toad of a man (they were still debating the man part), but the sudden feeling of doom that made its way into their hearts and stomachs.
“You two, go with Miss Chase to this shop this afternoon,” Snyder says, handing Buffy a slip of paper with a shop name and address on it. The proprietor will get you all outfitted.”
Before the girls can even begin to come up with excuses, Snyder turned on Xander and insisted he volunteer as well.
Resignedly, Buffy looks at Cordelia and said, “We’ll meet you after school and you can drive us there.”
Buffy hurried Willow off after giving Cordelia the shop address. Not even bothering to look at the paper with the costume on it.
The three girls, plus a very morose Xander, arrived at the shop indicated and approached the man who seemed to be in charge.
“May I help you,” he stated in an English accent.
Cordelia just handed him the slip of paper with the costume indicated on it. He read it, then perused the three young women in front of him.
“It would be better if you were at least all the same height,” he said after a few moments.
Before any of the girls could say ‘Too bad. Guess we’ll have to go tell Snyder it was a no go.’, he continued, “But I’m sure I can make it work.”
He either didn’t see or ignored their crest fallen faces. He went into the back of the store through a curtain and returned about a minute later with three identical outfits. Purple, long-sleeved mini-dresses with hems that ended above the middle of the thigh. The waist of the dresses was orange and had a point of orange that came out of the waist and would go between the lower cleavages of their breasts. The dresses also had orange cuffs that went half-way up the forearms. There were also orange capes that attached to the shoulders of the mini-dresses. There were also gold rings with a large ‘L’ on them and brown short haired wigs safety pinned to the dresses. And to top it off, or bottom it off to be more appropriate, were three pair of black calf-high flat heeled boots.
“But our panties will show if we wear those,” squeaked Willow.
With that the Englishman lifted up the bottom of each of the dresses to show a pair of cheerleader panties for each mini-dress. All three were different. One was all purple, one all orange and one was half and half orange on the left and purple on the right. He handed the mini-dress with the half and half panty to Cordelia, the all purple one to Buffy, and the all orange one to Willow.
“Do you have some changing rooms so we can make sure these fit?” asked Cordelia. “I’d hate to have Principle Snyder upset if they didn’t.”
Instead of being put out by her question, she and the other girls were ushered over to three curtained booths and left them to go help another customer. Since the booths were currently empty, the girls shrugged and went inside them to change.
A few minutes later, all three girls emerged from the booths with semi-shocked looks on their faces. The clothes they had been given had fit perfectly, including the boots. It was almost like they were made especially for each of them. With the wigs on they looked nearly identical, except for their varying heights and faces. Defeated in each of their plans to claim the costume didn’t fit, they re-entered the booths to change.
Xander was waiting for them when after they exited the booths in their street clothes. He had a hanger with a padded safari jacket and shorts on it that would probably make him look chubby. A matching pith helmet and scruffy looking fake beard and mustache hanging from the neck of the hanger. In his other hand he had a shoe box, apparently with hiking boots in it.
Before they could ask anything, Xander said, “I’m an explorer.”
When he didn’t elaborate, the girls decided not to press the issue. Even Cordelia decided that making Xander more depressed would not improve her own mood. So, none of them asked anything.
Cordelia dropped everyone off at their respective houses, with the girls agreeing to meet at Cordelia’s house to get changed. Xander would meet them at the school.
The wave of dizziness made her slump to the ground briefly. When it was over and she regained her feet, she realized she was alone. As she tried to figure out what could have happened, the ring on her finger began broadcasting,
“Luornu One, this is Two, do you hear me?” came the voice from the ring.
“I hear you,” she responded, speaking into the ring. “Do you have any idea what is going on? Have you heard from Three?”
“No clue. I just know we are not together,” came the voice.
“One. Two. This is Three,” suddenly came another voice similar to the other. “I’m confused as well but there appears to be some altercation between some unusual looking aliens and the more human looking residents of whatever planet we are on. I’ve had to save several children from vicious attacks.”
“Turn on your homing beacons and we’ll try to head toward each other while rescuing as many of the attacked as we can,” stated One. “Also turn on your emergency beacons to call any of the others who might be around. We may need more help than the three of us can provide.”
Having said that, she leaped into the air and flew towards the nearest screams.
Twenty minutes later, having actually moved farther from the others than she would have liked due to the many rescues she made, she came across a man who looked like an ancient pirate from a book she once read who was accosting a dark haired girl in a strange looking gown. She flew into the pirate, knocking him down and then yelled at the girl to run. The pirate got back up and attacked with his sword.
“A feisty wench,” he said. “You’ll do just as well.”
She ducked several of his swings before moving in close under his guard to grip his sword hand at the wrist to try and force him to let go. However, even as he did let go, she felt a hot pain just below her bottom, right rib. Swinging with all her might, she hit him in the jaw with doubled fists. This knocked him back six feet and into a wall where he slumped to the ground unconscious.
Reaching down towards the pain in her side, she discovered a dagger hilt jutting from her body. As shock set in she barely had time to raise her ring hand and say, “Help,” before she too slumped to the ground.
An unspecified time later, she heard voices, though she herself seemed unable to move or speak.
“We have to get her to a med unit,” said one voice.
“We don’t know where any are in this place,” replied the other.
“She’ll die if we don’t do something,” came the first voice again.
“I know,” responded the second. “That’s why we have to …”
“Are you crazy?” interrupted the first voice. “There’s no guarantee that will work and if it doesn’t we die too!”
“Are you willing to live without her?” asked the second voice quietly.
“No,” was the equally soft reply.
“Alright then lets do it,” said the second voice with conviction.
She thought to her self, *Three is right it’s too risky. I can’t let them die trying to save me.*
However, before she could try to voice that opinion, she was once again pulled down into darkness. But she also felt whole again.
Next morning, in the Library, Xander was talking to Giles.
“All I am going to say on the subject is that it was totally embarrassing,” said the young male Scoob. “I spent nearly the entire night down at the docks looking for my boat so I could weather the weirdness, snug in my cabin. I’m just glad that Angel thought to contact you once he realized something wasn’t right.”
“And if you tell Buffy I said that I will deny every word,” he quickly added after thinking about what he’d said.
“Not to worry,” replied the Watcher. “Are you sure you didn’t see the girls last night?”
“Giles, the way they were dressed, even my character would have noticed them, but I didn’t catch sight of them. Still no word?” Xander asked.
“No,” was Giles’s reply. “I called the Chase residence earlier and the maid indicated that Cordelia showed up late but seemed to be very tired and had gone straight to bed. She was still sleeping when I called and I could think of no good reason to give for her to be awakened. Willow’s parents are out of town again so I tried there, but there has been no response to my phone calls there. I hesitate to call Buffy’s place lest I alarm her mother. I find myself a bit worried.”
“Maybe I should run over to Buff’s and Willow’s to see what the story is?” said Xander questioningly. “It’ll look less suspicious if I do it.”
“You may……” Giles reply was cut off as the doors to the Library were thrown open and Cordelia rushed in, still wearing her costume.
“Giles, you have to help us!” she yelled.
“Cor..Cordelia,” Giles sputtered. “Of course I’ll help. But which us are you talking about?”
“Me, Buffy, and Willow,” she shouted back, in near hysterics. “Who else would it be?”
“What exactly do you want me to do?” he asked in attempt to get enough information to be able to do anything.
“We want you to fix this,” she said.
Suddenly, her image blurred a bit and the next instant there were three of her standing there. Only on closer examination of the faces of all three, did both Xander and Giles realize that it wasn’t three Cordelias standing there but Buffy on the right, Willow on the left, and Cordelia center.
It was then that the costume triggered Giles’ memory.
“Triplicate Girl,” he said in disbelief.