Maybe NC17 eventuallyCharacters:
Ben and Lindsey. Maybe others laterWarnings:
Slash. Swearing will feature too, most likely.Disclaimer:
I do not own any of the characters in either Buffy The Vampire Slayer or Angel. I am borrowing them for entertainment purposes and no copyright infringement is intendedAuthor's Notes:
I started this a while back and have posted it elsewhere before. I am posting it here with some alterations in the hopes that if people read and like it, I will be encouraged to finish it.
Also, it is hasn't had a beta reader. I have cast a scrutinous eye over it myself before I posted it, but if anyone would like to volunteer, I will be most appreciative1
There are two types of near-death experience.
There's the common one that many people experience, whereby circumstances prevent an outcome from occurring that the person believes would have killed them. Like when someone steps into the road in front of an oncoming car, and the car stops in time. The person's death might have occurred, but it wasn't certain; they were, however near
a death experience.
The second sort is the true one, the proper one, whereby a person dies for a brief moment, only to be revived. Cases of women in pregnancy seeing the light
are most likely to be examples of this, if the women are to be believed. Also, people rescued from frozen lakes have been reported to be dead for several minutes before being revived fall into this category.
Ben, he's experienced both, but more recently, the latter (although near-murder experience would probably describe it better). Not that he hadn't deserved it, but he really didn't want to admit that. He had for a long time, wanted to do good, to help people; his medical was career a testament to that. The fact that he had so quickly abandoned that desire, been willing to sacrifice the lives of millions for his own preservation sickened him.
And yet, he couldn't help notice the irony of the situation. The part of him that caused him to abandon his principles to save his own life was the very part of him that kept him alive when he should have died. Despite her weakened state, Glory had surfaced once again, only briefly; her own sense of self preservation as strong as his. Had she not, Ben would have stayed dead, taking her with him.
He thought it a good idea to leave Sunnydale. He didn't want Giles to kill him again but more importantly, he didn't want to risk Glory killing Buffy along with anyone else who knew her (the fact that Buffy had already died was unknown to him). Not that he thought this would happen. He was certain he was in control. It was only the fact that he was so close to death that had allowed Glory to surface after her own beating. It allowed Ben enough time to regain his strength and assert himself once again. Glory still remained weakened, of that he was certain, and he was resolved to never let her surface again. A visit to a powerful mystic and a magic charm worn around his neck helped to strengthen his resolve.
So he left Sunnydale about three years ago. Moved to nowhere in particular, sort of a road trip kind of deal, but with no final destination. It was the travelling that was important, the constant change of his surroundings preventing him from dwelling on his actions in Sunnydale, burying his guilt under new buildings and unfamiliar sounds and sights and smells. It was refreshing. The last few years had not been easy, medical school had demanded a lot from him, and Sunnydale was not the happy ending he longed for, so he embraced the new and the fresh. He felt like a tourist, and visited the places he had taken for granted. For a while it appeased him. For a while, he found a measure of, well not peace, but something close to it.
As his savings dwindled, he supplemented his funds by selling Glory's possessions (it annoyed him that she was always able to lead a more lavish lifestyle than he, so he had no compunction in doing this), but that well was fast running dry. His lack of money forced him to evaluate his situation, to plan what he would do next and this brought him to a realization, almost a revelation in fact; he was lonely. Being practically a nomad for three years will do that to a man, he thought. Everywhere he went, he saw couples, friends, people in contact with others, reminding him that he had none of that. Since Sunnydale, he had not met one person with whom he was on a first name basis. In fact, He didn’t know the first names of anyone new unless they had it on a badge on their uniform. For the past three years, he had gone without any form of meaningful social interaction and that was something he did not want to continue any more.