Disclaimer: once again I do not own Harry Potter nor Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Maybe he'd Choose Her: Part Two
They spent the summer that followed Dumbledore’s death at the Burrow, planning and waiting for the right moment to come.
She hadn’t wanted the time to leave to arrive, not at first, for she doubted her ability to help in the quest. She wasn’t as smart as Hermione and couldn’t do magic well enough. Not to mention the fact that she had been incredibly out of shape. She doubted that, if they were to be attacked by vampires, she could defeat then.
She had long ago resigned to her job as the Slayer and at that moment came to realize that it was her biggest asset against the Death Eaters, who probably didn’t know anything about hand to hand combat.
With that at mind, she had used the time spent at the Burrow to train. She used all the time she had to spare to get back into shape but sadly it wasn’t much because Mrs. Weasley kept giving them all chores to do. Even though she couldn’t do more than run and practice a few moves at mornings, she had felt an improvement.
Things had been going smoothly until they went to pick up Harry from his relatives. The mission was a success, but it cost Mad Eye’s life. After that terrible loss, things seem to go back to a certain degree of normalcy. They had to work non stop on the wedding preparations and every free time they could afford was used on planning, so she had to stop training.
Bill’s wedding was interrupted by Ministry officials so she and the others took it as an opportunity to leave. They ended going to Grimmauld Place where they had spent their time devising a plan to retrieve Slytherin’s Locket from Umbridge.
They had gone to the Ministry to steal it from her but, even if the mission had been a success, things hadn’t gone exactly as they’d planned them. They had the horcrux but their hiding place had been discovered and thus they were unable to return to it. Thankfully Hermione had packed a magical tent in her purse so the following months were spent camping in different location.
It was in this time that Buffy and the others had noticed Ron’s constantly deteriorating mood. It had started with him being easily irritated and had quickly grown into him being angry all the time.
At one point Ron’s mood decayed to such extent that, after yelling at Hermione, he’d stormed out of the tent. Buffy had been outside of it when it happened, when she’d seen him run out she had yelled at him to stop. He did, only for a moment and to tell her to get real and forget the man that would never see her that way, to leave them be. After that he kept going. The words had stung her so much that she hadn’t noticed that the “them” Ron had spoken about was Harry and Hermione. Thoughts of him and Ginny had come to her mind and wouldn’t leave her, even if she tried to cast them out of her mind.
Thankfully, after Ron’s outburst Harry decided that they should stop wearing the locket, as their friend’s moods had always been worse when he wore it. If it had made Ron act the way he did she couldn’t have imagined what it would have done to her. Still she’d understood that he had a point and it was no use to be close to Harry, she’d only end up getting hurt.
After Ron’s departure she spent most of her time comforting Hermione and avoiding Harry like the plague. The last proved to be quite difficult though.
They’d gone to Godric’s Hollow and Harry had gotten hurt. She had wanted to reach out to him, to make him get better but instead she just watched as Hermione gave him different potions, she’d stayed by his side for a while, but had left it as soon as he started waking up.
When Ron returned he’d asked her to walk with him and had asked for her forgiveness for what he said. He told her that Hermione and Harry would never become a couple so she should not be avoiding the Boy-Who-Lived. He’d confided in her that Harry had been feeling confused and hurt by her behavior. She’d accepted his apologies but hadn’t made any move to close the gap between her and Harry.
Afterwards they’d been caught by the snatchers and had been taken to Malfoy Manor. Since the four of them had refused to reveal any information to the Death Eaters, the Dark Lord’s followers decided that if they tortured the Mudbloods the boys would loosen their tongues.
Buffy had been terrified at that moment. Not for her but for her best friend. She knew that the Slayer in her could probably take the pain better but didn’t know what the Cruciatus Curse would’ve done to Hermione’s mind.
Once she had been hit by the Curse she didn’t know if it was any less painful. She didn’t remember much of what had happened afterwards, she recalled though Hermione’s screams of pain, some cackles, Ron’s and Harry’s shouts and another set of pained filled screams, which she was fairly certain that were hers.
Somehow Harry had managed to get them out of there but not without a cost. Hermione and she had been hurt, as was Olivander and Griphook. Though non of the former prisoners of Malfoy manor lost their lives, their rescuer did.
Dobby had died and they were probably about to face their biggest challenge yet. There was no way to know if their plan to break in to Gringotts would succeed. Besides she couldn’t shake the feeling that the next day more would happen than just robbing the bank. She was certain that the final battle was upon them.
Apparently Harry felt the same way. The night before they headed there he came to her; he was scared and grieved by the deaths that had taken place. He didn’t want to continue fighting because he could get more people killed but he was terrified about stopping, for that had even worse consequences. He clearly needed comfort; he needed her to be his friend again, so she was going to give it to him. It hadn’t mattered if she got hurt,at least not at that moment.
What happened that night still seemed like a dream to her, one that she could hardly remember. She had grabbed a bottle of firewhisky from Bill’s stash and both had gone outside to drink it. They talked of a lot of things, they laughed of old school stories, they cried over dead friends and, once they were both completely smashed, something had happened. Harry had kissed her. She had been shocked and sensing no response he started stammering an apology, but her drunk mind would have non of it so she kissed him back.
Harry had been surprised now but he quickly retaliated. She couldn’t remember much of what happened next, except that the kissing grew more heated and that one thing led to another.
The next morning she had woken up on Bill’s couch with a pounding headache and an incredible joy though she didn’t remember lying on the couch and Harry was nowhere to be seen. She couldn’t help but her hopes up. Harry had kissed her, he had slept with her, and so he obviously had to feel something more than friendship towards her.
Maybe, just maybe, when the time came, he would choose her over Ginny.
All of her hopes came crashing down though once they were in Hogwarts. When Ginny had come out of Ariana’s portrait she had seen the way Harry looked at her and was overwhelmed with the knowledge that he’d never choose her.
She had wanted to cry, she had wanted to scream and she wanted to run away. Why was life being so unfair to her? Why had she been given the man that she loved to have him taken away from her? Would he always look at her as a mistake that, if known, could jeopardize his relationship with the woman he loved? She couldn’t be there. She couldn’t stay to find out. Why should she have stayed?
She had looked around to everyone in the Room of Requirement, trying to say a silent goodbye. Most people ignored her while preparing for what came but some came to her and congratulated her on what the group had accomplished that year, she was told that her and the others had given them hope. Those greetings didn’t mean much to her though, she hadn’t wanted to be a symbol to them.
She started heading towards Ariana’s portrait once again when her path had been interrupted by Neville Longbottom. He didn’t have any praise to say to her, he just told her that he had missed her throughout that year.
Buffy felt like she belonged. This world had been her home for two years and just at that moment she came to realize that it was also her world, one that was worth fighting for. Her responsibility wasn’t loyalty towards Dumbledore or love towards Harry but towards herself and the fact that she didn’t want to lose her world to Voldemort. For the first time she fought for the whole world and not just for one person that meant something to her.
The fight was long and gruesome but they won. It had seemed that the minute after it ended the stream of celebrations started. Many holidays were created to honor those who fought and to praise those who remained alive. It was at the Albus Dumbledore Day that Harry and Ginny announced that they were a couple again.
She never spoke to Harry about what happened that night. Not when it broke her heart to see him with Ginny, not when she wanted to yell at him for hardly talking at her anymore and not when she started getting sick. When she realized that she was pregnant she had wanted him there, she had wanted to demand him to be there but she remained silent, he was happy and in love and she could not ruin it for him. She loved him that much.
So now, two and a half months after Voldemort’s defeat, she had her bags packed and was ready to go. No explanations, no silent goodbyes, not one last look towards those green eyes that could easily make her change her mind. Just one long look towards the castle and she would be gone, forever.
She would return to her mother. Though she knew it would be rough at first she was certain that Joyce Summers would not throw her out of her house for being pregnant.
Besides, she always had wanted to see that Sunnydale town that her mom kept bragging about in her letters.