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Annoying Little Bee

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Summary: From the moment her little sister insisted that Dean and Sam stay with them, all Buffy has been doing is making Dean’s life a living hell.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Supernatural > Buffy-Centered > Theme: HumorEmeralEmberFR131850031,44920 Mar 0820 Mar 08Yes
Title: Annoying Little Bee
Rating: PG-13 (minor language)
Author: EmeralEmber
Summary: From the moment her little sister insisted that Dean and Sam stay with them, all Buffy has been doing is making Dean’s life a living hell.
Status: One Shot
Disclaimer: The characters in this story do not belong to me in any sense. Thank you.

Every day it was something different. First she put hair bleach in all the shampoos, and told everyone but him. The next day she put orange dye in the toothpaste. The day after that, she put something in his coffee that made him throw-up every time he tasted alcohol and gave him beer flavored candy. She had some demon turn him into a woman the next day. After that when he was asleep she played some airplane movie very loud, to give him a nightmare, and make him fall off the bed head first. After that she pretended to want to apologize and gave him a cup of coffee, which turned out to be some of the blood Spike had gotten for himself. She had his car shrunken down to a size suitable for a Barbie. She had put super-glue on the doorknob. She put super-glue on his pants zipper. She had put a bumper sticker on his car that said, “Gay and Proud”. She had put a balloon on the exhaust of his car, almost making him drive into a tree when it popped. And what was worse, the annoying blond was denying all of it. Even when he had seen her do some of the things.

But today, would be different. Oh yes. Today, Dean was going to have his revenge on Buffy Summers, and it was going to be fun. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do, but it would be good. And it would have to be better than just dying her hair. Of course with that he sighed and looked at his now white hair in the mirror. “No one’s hair is meant to be this white. It’s just not natural.”

Now, first thing he had to do was shave, and he would do that fast and go get back at Buffy. But, Dean didn’t get too far with shaving. Because as soon as he started the bathroom door was opened and the eldest Summers girl yelling something that sounded like “Gay porn,” and left again slamming the door. All this, just to make him cut himself. And he did. There was a huge cut down his left cheek, and it kept bleeding. Grabbing the hand towel that was on the sink and putting it on his cheek, Dean headed to the living room. He was done with this.

“Okay, Summers. What the hell is wrong with you?” he yelled as soon as he stepped into the living room, wondering then how Buffy had had enough time to change. Her and Dawn were sitting down on the couch sharing a big bowl of cereal while watching a re-run of American Idol.

“Um…you’re….blocking….the…light?” She responded slowly as if he had known the answer and she was supposed to guess.

“No! The bleach, the car shrinking, the woman making, the super-glue, and now the cut across my face. I don’t get it!”

Dawn got up from the couch, and sidestepped Dean so she could get into the kitchen where he assumed the rest of the people in the house were. As soon as the younger girl was out of the room, Buffy’s attention turned back to Dean, “I keep telling you, I haven’t done any of that.”

“I’ve seen you!”

“I’ve been here all morning!”

“Sam,” a new voice that sounded like Willow came from the up-stairs. As if on cue Dean turned towards the stairs, Buffy got up walking over to them, and Willow started down them with a laptop in hand. “The Buffybot’s been doing some weird things. Why would it put hair bleach in the shampoo bottles? I mean,” she said as she started into the kitchen, “I know I told you to make sure it did what it was told, but I was thinking more along the lines of killing demons.”

“Son of a..” Dean started a laughter erupted in the kitchen.

"I so got you dude!” Sam was head, as Dawn walked back into the room.

“And to be fair,” she started looking between the smiling Buffy and slightly shocked Dean, “All the car things…all my idea. And I told Sam he should play some pranks on you with the Buffybot to get back at her for not letting me have my friends over.”

With that Dawn ran upstairs before Buffy could do anything to hurt her, or ground her in anyway. “It was an apocalypse! I was not going to have a bunch of pubescent girls running around while trying to save the world!”

“I’m gonna kick your ass, Sam,” the two older siblings said at the same time and took off in different directions. It was a good thing Dawn was almost an adult. And a good thing Sam already was. Not that they would kill their siblings. Only metaphorically. Maybe a little mentally.

The End

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