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Xander the Maou

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Summary: Xander picks up a strange sword at Ethan's, and becomes the demon king! Now with Stargate and Discworld!

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Multiple Crossings > Xander-Centered
Anime > Kyo Kara Maou
Literature > Sir Terry Pratchett
Stargate > Xander-Centered
NerdgirlFR183638,60616290305,84920 Mar 085 Aug 13No

Chapter 11

SGC main briefing room

"Report, Colonel?" General Hammond ordered. "How did the interview go?"

Col. O'Neill sighed. He had not been looking forward to this briefing. "Well, sir, it was...unexpected to say the least. After getting the runaround and a bunch of weird answers from the boy, I'd hoped that the interview with the girl would have been easier."

"But it wasn't?" Hammond queried.

A soft snicker came from further down the table. The two turned to look at Daniel Jackson, who was barely containing his mirth. "Sorry, but you just had to be there. Except for the accent and the fact that she's female, Kendra did a fairly good impression of Teal'C, the strong, stoic, SILENT type."

Hammond frowned. "She wouldn't talk? Did you get any information out of her, to confirm or deny her companion's story?"

"Well, she kept up the closed mouth routine for a while, but things got a bit...heated up when she found out we'd been questioning Mr. Harris. Then things got a bit out of control," Jack said, remembering.



***Flashback***



Kendra woke up slowly, to far less pain than she had been expecting, Slayer healing notwithstanding. For a moment, she deeply regreted the enhanced sense of smell that she (usually) enjoyed, as the astringent scent of antiseptic mixed with the taint of old blood and smoke assailed her nose. No matter how well hospitals cleaned, they never could completely remove or mask the scent of their work, not for her. Especially millitary hospitals, whose primary business came from treating the results of war. All in all, it was not a pleasant thing to wake up to.

As the place was completely unfamiliar to her, she assumed that Xander's crazy scheme had worked, but where had they landed? And where was Xander? Suddenly, she was pulled out of her reverie by the sound of a throat clearing. Standing next to her bedside were two men, one whose bearing positively screamed 'career millitary,' and another, whose posture reminded her of Giles, absolutely focused, bookish, but with the sense that this was a man who had also seen action.

The bookish man chose to speak first. They seemed to be going the good cop route first, or sending the non-threatening one to try and get answers out of the frightened female. "Miss...Kendra, was it? I'm Daniel Jackson, and this is Jack O'Neill. I know you must be tired after your ordeal, but we're trying to help piece together what happened. Can you tell us where you are from, and how you got here?"

She just raised an eyebrow. The man's oh-so-subtle interrogation was mildly amusing. Had the stern looking man taken the lead, she might have decided not to respond, but since it was the Giles-like man...she decided to have a little fun with him. "California. And no."

Kendra could see that the millitary guy was not amused, but he allowed his companion to continue. "We aren't going to hurt you. We just want to verify a few things, make sure you aren't going to endanger anyone here. From what your friend Xander told us, you came from an alternate Earth, one with a...snake problem?"

Her face darkened at the mention of Xander. He wasn't in the room, and she only had vague memories of arriving in this place, memories of falling and the ratcheting sound of guns being readied. While Jackson seemed to be fairly earnest, she could not afford to trust them. "You spoke wit' Xander? Where is he?" Her voice took on an edge, "If you have hurt him, I will not show you any mercy!"

Jack held up his hands in a gesture that was meant to be calming. "Hey now, calm down! We haven't done anything. In fact, we took care of him after he got worn out healing you."

The explanation was not as convincing as the Colonel obviously hoped. She tensed, readying herself for a fight. Her eyes swept the room, looking for and finding objects that could be used as makeshift weapons. Hospital rooms could easily double as armories, for those with the knowledge and skill.

Jack tensed slightly, aware of her actions, subtle as they were. It was what he would have been doing, in her situation. But that made it all the more disconcerting, that a teenage girl would have the same reactions as a black-ops veteran. While they could certainly handle her if she became violent, he didn't want to have to hurt her.

Just then, the infirmary door opened, startling everyone and disrupting the rising tension slightly. Teal'c entered, dressed in his usual off-duty millitary casual, a dark hat pulled low over his forhead. He noted the tension in the room. "Pardon the intrusion, but the delegation scheduled to arrive at 18:00 is early and requests the presence of Dr. Jackson."

Staring at the tall alien, Kendra looked as though she was about to spring into action. Jack noted that her focus was not on his face, but rather lower, on his lower abdomen, where the infant Goa'ould lay in its pouch. Mentally cursing, he realized the folly of exposing the girl who was, according to young Xander's slip of the tongue, a survivor of a Goa'ould attack to a Jaffa. If their school was indeed destroyed by a 'snake,' they would not be happy to see one of the Goa'oulds' former servants.

"Demon!" she hissed, and threw herself out of bed. What followed was pure poetry in motion, which Jack would have been in a far better position to appreciate had he not been on the opposing side. Heedless of the flapping hospital gown, Kendra launched herself into the air, grabbing an iv stand to use as a staff, which she swung at Teal'c. Only the quick reflexes developed over long years of fighting saved him from a cracked skull. As he moved to block her, she ducked down and attempted to sweep his feet out from under him.

What followed was a deadly dance, done at a speed almost too great to follow. The fight was savage, graceful, and utterly skillful. Surprisingly enough, both had a hint of a smile on their faces. There was no doubt in the observers' minds that they were watching two masters at work. Jack and Daniel were forced to move to the side to avoid being hit; there were simply no openings to let them join the fight. The two combatants showed no signs of awareness of their observers, nor of the presence of the M.P.'s who showed up only to be stood down. In such close quarters, there was simply too much of a risk of hitting one of their own.

The fight continued, in fact, until another door inside the infirmary was thrown open, and Xander himself, dressed only in a rumpled hospital gown, staggered into the room. "Geez, you guys. What does a guy have to do to get some shut-eye around here? What's with all the racket?" He leaned against the doorway, appearing utterly harmless in the sight of all of the armed personnel.

With a startled cry of "Xander," Kendra threw herself at her friend. The battle readiness faded away, leaving her looking like an ordinary teen again, a far cry from the warrior persona she had just shown. Then she smacked him upside the head. "I t'ought dat you were in trouble. As usual. Where da hell did you bring us, dis place feels strange and dere is somet'ing EVIL in dat guy."

The young man blushed and hung his head sheepishly. As the members of SG-1 looked on in fascination, he replied, "I didn't mean to do it! I've never made a portal before, and since I'm not supposed to go to the usual place it would have connected to, it just went randomly. Besides, I didn't CHOOSE to go to a place where big guys have evil in their stomaches. Why would I do that?"

'Evil stomaches?' "Hey, wait," Jack broke in, "you can sense the Goa'ould in Teal'c's stomach?"

The pair looked confused. "Goa'ould? What the heck is a Goa'ould?" Xander asked.

"Whadaya mean, 'what's a Goa'ould?' A snake, you said that your town was being attacked by an evil snake, right? Probably some kind of evil guy with a tendency towards delusions of godhood? Well, the real name for those guys is Goa'ould," Jack explained.

"But how could one of dem fit in his stomach?" Kendra asked. "Unless...is he pregnant wit' one? Maybe he is incubating one of de eggs?"

At their confused looks, she continued, "De Olvikan, he was a giant snake, eighty, mebbe ninety feet long, eight feet wide. He wanted to consume all dose at da graduation, dat would have been de easiest place to hunt for food."

Xander was nodding in agreement. "He was an evil bastard, had been planning to become a true demon, one of the Old Ones. We had him for town mayor for over a century and no one realized until it was almost too late." He looked at their stunned faces and asked, "What? What did I say?"



***Later***



"So, it turns out that they really AREN"T from some Goa'ould infested planet. Which is good because if the snakes ever invaded California, I doubt anyone would notice. I mean, have you seen downtown L.A.?" At General Hammond's scowl, Jack continued, "Anyway, their whole snake thing turned out to be something completely different from our snake thing. And once they realized Teal'c was not an enemy, things calmed down pretty quickly. I think Teal'c may be interested in having the girl as a sparring partner, at least until we find a way to get the kids home."

Teal'c inclined his head. "Indeed. She is a most worthy adversary. Her form is technically very good, and she becomes very creative in her choice and usage of weapons when she believes her comrade to be threatened."

Hammond nodded. "That is surprising with someone as young as she is. What of the boy?"

Daniel spoke up. "He let a few things slip. He seems to know more about how he arrived here than he first let on. That and his healing abilities make me think he is somehow concealing alien technology, or perhaps has abilities similar to the Ascended. But if that is true, he may not have complete control over those powers. He did mention that they were traveling fairly randomly, and that the 'usual destination' was barred to him. I wonder what he meant by that?"

"Perhaps the answer to the question lies within the bag young XanderHarris was carrying with him when he arrived. I have not seen a report on its contents yet. It seemed to contain something rather large. Has its nature been identified yet?" Teal'c inquired.

"Uh, Teal'c, buddy, what do you mean, his bag? I don't remember....his bag? Wait, wasn't their something, yes, a black bag? Wasn't that stored with his clothes in the infirmary?" Jack was confused; there had been a bag, but his mind remained fuzzy on the details.

"That is really odd, I seem to recall something about a bag as well, but it didn't seem important..." Daniel looked around at his colleagues; all except Teal'c had slightly confused looks on their faces that were giving way to irritation and worry.

"Well, gentlemen, I believe we have a mystery to solve. Carter can go over that bag and see what kind of technology it's using to cloud our minds and for what purpose. And then, Jack, I believe you're due for another talk with young Mr. Harris. Dismissed."



What's causing the confusion field? What will happen when they open that bag? Find out next time.
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